soft&squishy
04-21-2009, 01:01 AM
Hi. I wanted some advice to give to my mother who has become involved with a narcissist. My mother became friends with a woman at work a few years ago and she talks to her on the phone nearly everyday and my mom said she was okay at first but my mom has been drained emotionally by this woman. My mom comes home really angry and with a chip on her shoulder just by dealing with this narcissist person at work. She was never like this, she was always happy.
Anytime my mother tries to have a simple innocent conversation she has turn it onto herself and say why her or her family are better. She goes around critcizing everyone such "Look at her she is so ugly, short and fat." My mother is a short person and a little overweight so this basically a cheap shot at my mother. She always says that all the guys are always telling her she is so beautiful and gorgeous (believe me she is definetly NOT). She is focused only on physical appearances, bragging that no one has a grand daughter as beautiful as hers and that all the others girls at her school aren't as pretty as her. Sounds very elementary doesn't it?? She has an extreme fantasies about her beauty, success and love. She is definetly not attractive and always lies about people's reactions of her beauty (such as her doctor telling her she looks sexy!!), she works at a minimum wage job at a grocery store and her husband has been working night shift at his job just so he won't have to be home with her and he has had affairs on her and she has had some too but she brags to people at work that her and her husband have "true love." If thats "true love" then you can count me out. I'm sorry I'm getting a angry as I am typing this because of all the pain she is causing my mother and others at her work (2 people have quit their jobs because of her, including her own cousin). I am 100% sure this woman is a full blown Narcissist.
I told my mother to stop talking with this woman all together and don't answer her phone calls and just ignore her at work. I get mad when my mother answers the phone to talk to her almost everyday. My mom said she's afraid of her and if she doesn't answer the phone she will be angry and anytime she tries to ignore her she begins to talk smack about my mother to all the other co-workers and my mothers self esteem is so damaged from this woman that I think she couldn't even handle that. I think that my mother is too far sucked in to leave because she has to see this woman everyday at work. I told my mother to switch to a different department at her work so that she won't ever have to see her but there are no openings at the time and who knows when there will be. I just don't want my mother to end up with a mental illness because of this sick woman. PLEASE HELP!!:confused::confused:
Anytime my mother tries to have a simple innocent conversation she has turn it onto herself and say why her or her family are better. She goes around critcizing everyone such "Look at her she is so ugly, short and fat." My mother is a short person and a little overweight so this basically a cheap shot at my mother. She always says that all the guys are always telling her she is so beautiful and gorgeous (believe me she is definetly NOT). She is focused only on physical appearances, bragging that no one has a grand daughter as beautiful as hers and that all the others girls at her school aren't as pretty as her. Sounds very elementary doesn't it?? She has an extreme fantasies about her beauty, success and love. She is definetly not attractive and always lies about people's reactions of her beauty (such as her doctor telling her she looks sexy!!), she works at a minimum wage job at a grocery store and her husband has been working night shift at his job just so he won't have to be home with her and he has had affairs on her and she has had some too but she brags to people at work that her and her husband have "true love." If thats "true love" then you can count me out. I'm sorry I'm getting a angry as I am typing this because of all the pain she is causing my mother and others at her work (2 people have quit their jobs because of her, including her own cousin). I am 100% sure this woman is a full blown Narcissist.
I told my mother to stop talking with this woman all together and don't answer her phone calls and just ignore her at work. I get mad when my mother answers the phone to talk to her almost everyday. My mom said she's afraid of her and if she doesn't answer the phone she will be angry and anytime she tries to ignore her she begins to talk smack about my mother to all the other co-workers and my mothers self esteem is so damaged from this woman that I think she couldn't even handle that. I think that my mother is too far sucked in to leave because she has to see this woman everyday at work. I told my mother to switch to a different department at her work so that she won't ever have to see her but there are no openings at the time and who knows when there will be. I just don't want my mother to end up with a mental illness because of this sick woman. PLEASE HELP!!:confused::confused:
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writeleft
04-21-2009, 01:11 AM
The best weapon you can give your mother is knowledge. Print up a few articles of narcissists. Go through them with your mother. There will be warning signs, which your mother can learn and hopefully be able to step away from this manipulator. Education is the best tool you can give a person to identify, avoid, and protect your mother from this horrible situation.
Her co-worker is not well, and your mother must learn to immunize herself against the contagious illness that is her co-worker.
I learned this from stepping to protect my mother and father from my sister, who is a sociopath. You must help her. These kinds of illnesses people have will destroy everything in their path, so you must get your mother out of the way.
I wish you and your mother the best.
Her co-worker is not well, and your mother must learn to immunize herself against the contagious illness that is her co-worker.
I learned this from stepping to protect my mother and father from my sister, who is a sociopath. You must help her. These kinds of illnesses people have will destroy everything in their path, so you must get your mother out of the way.
I wish you and your mother the best.