BipolarPrincess
05-12-2009, 12:49 AM
Yeah, I seem to love to sleep. I slept after taking benadryl from 4am last night until 7:30 this evening. Now I feel better at night and less depressed and less anxious. I dread for mornings to come, where most people are "productive" I feel more sad. I don't know what is wrong with me. Anyone else going to be up or is up right now? I'm so alone in this world. :(
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dreams in neon
05-12-2009, 01:06 AM
I feel the same way you do. I prefer the quiet of night since that's when the world is sleeping and I don't have to be reminded of how depressed I am when I hear everyone going about their day (when I'm going through a depressive episode). I don't think there's anything wrong with you. I know alot of people with bipolar who like to stay up all night and sleep during the day. You may feel better knowing that there are people who don't have bipolar who enjoy doing the same thing. One of my girlfriends is an example. She loves staying up all night, but sleeps during most of the day yet she doesn't have bipolar, unipolar depression or any other kind of mental illness.
BipolarPrincess
05-12-2009, 02:52 AM
I feel the same way you do. I prefer the quiet of night since that's when the world is sleeping and I don't have to be reminded of how depressed I am when I hear everyone going about their day (when I'm going through a depressive episode). I don't think there's anything wrong with you. I know alot of people with bipolar who like to stay up all night and sleep during the day. You may feel better knowing that there are people who don't have bipolar who enjoy doing the same thing. One of my girlfriends is an example. She loves staying up all night, but sleeps during most of the day yet she doesn't have bipolar, unipolar depression or any other kind of mental illness.
Okay, good. lol. I feel like a "night owl".. I guess when I'm stable enough to work again I'll work at night.. or maybe I'll learn to enjoy the day ahead of me. bah.:dizzy:
Okay, good. lol. I feel like a "night owl".. I guess when I'm stable enough to work again I'll work at night.. or maybe I'll learn to enjoy the day ahead of me. bah.:dizzy:
dreams in neon
05-12-2009, 03:00 AM
Okay, good. lol. I feel like a "night owl".. I guess when I'm stable enough to work again I'll work at night.. or maybe I'll learn to enjoy the day ahead of me. bah.:dizzy:
Working at night is a great idea. I also think that once you have something to keep you busy, you'll start looking forward to each new day.
Working at night is a great idea. I also think that once you have something to keep you busy, you'll start looking forward to each new day.
BipolarPrincess
05-12-2009, 03:05 AM
Working at night is a great idea. I also think that once you have something to keep you busy, you'll start looking forward to each new day.
yeah, you're right. I'm just wasting my life away right now until therapy time. I'm going to read I'll probably check back on in a little. Also I feel I can't relate to anyone, I judge people and don't understand why they act the way they do. I feel they are all stupid and ignorant. I guess it's MY problem. I don't know. The only person I relate to is my boyfriend..but he still doesn't understand me 100 percent which sucks. I want to connect with him on that level, I feel he's my soulmate as does he.
yeah, you're right. I'm just wasting my life away right now until therapy time. I'm going to read I'll probably check back on in a little. Also I feel I can't relate to anyone, I judge people and don't understand why they act the way they do. I feel they are all stupid and ignorant. I guess it's MY problem. I don't know. The only person I relate to is my boyfriend..but he still doesn't understand me 100 percent which sucks. I want to connect with him on that level, I feel he's my soulmate as does he.
dreams in neon
05-12-2009, 03:22 AM
yeah, you're right. I'm just wasting my life away right now until therapy time. I'm going to read I'll probably check back on in a little. Also I feel I can't relate to anyone, I judge people and don't understand why they act the way they do. I feel they are all stupid and ignorant. I guess it's MY problem. I don't know. The only person I relate to is my boyfriend..but he still doesn't understand me 100 percent which sucks. I want to connect with him on that level, I feel he's my soulmate as does he.
Perhaps when you start therapy you can learn how to view people differently and accept their faults.
I used to have the same problem in high school. I was a perfectionist in every way and anyone who didn't meet my expectations was looked down upon, criticized and insulted.
Alot has changed since then although I still struggle from time to time to accept that people are different from me.
Sometimes I'm hard on others and think they should approach and think about things the same way I do.
I also forget that not everyone has the same experiences in life.
Some people are extremely angry and/or bitter (Note that I'm not referring to people with bipolar, depression or other kinds of mental illness. I'm talking about people who do not have mental illness and have everything going for them yet they refuse to see how fortunate they are.) while others see the good even in the worst of circumstances.
It may take awhile for you to learn how to change the way you look at others, but I think it can be done with time and patience.
Perhaps when you start therapy you can learn how to view people differently and accept their faults.
I used to have the same problem in high school. I was a perfectionist in every way and anyone who didn't meet my expectations was looked down upon, criticized and insulted.
Alot has changed since then although I still struggle from time to time to accept that people are different from me.
Sometimes I'm hard on others and think they should approach and think about things the same way I do.
I also forget that not everyone has the same experiences in life.
Some people are extremely angry and/or bitter (Note that I'm not referring to people with bipolar, depression or other kinds of mental illness. I'm talking about people who do not have mental illness and have everything going for them yet they refuse to see how fortunate they are.) while others see the good even in the worst of circumstances.
It may take awhile for you to learn how to change the way you look at others, but I think it can be done with time and patience.
seaturtle
05-12-2009, 11:32 PM
I am that way, too. I can't sleep before 3,4,5 - even 8 or 9 a.m.
I look forward to darkness coming. As neondreams says, it's quite, no phone calls, no noise, no bright lights that are too much for my eyes, and no more of that constant over-stimulation of the senses.
I dread the coming of the light, too. Now, it's a bit different, since I am a passionate gardener (read "gardening maniac"), so in the afternoons, I work outside when I can - then, the light is welcome, not to me, but for my plants.
I don't know anyone else like this, who prefers the darkness. I think we must have reverse seasonal affective disorder on a daily basis, lol. People talk about how they love to get up and spend the day at a lake, fear the darkness. It's the opposite for me - the darkness, I find to be comforting and sheltering an kind.
Thank for the topic. As always, I'm not alone.
I look forward to darkness coming. As neondreams says, it's quite, no phone calls, no noise, no bright lights that are too much for my eyes, and no more of that constant over-stimulation of the senses.
I dread the coming of the light, too. Now, it's a bit different, since I am a passionate gardener (read "gardening maniac"), so in the afternoons, I work outside when I can - then, the light is welcome, not to me, but for my plants.
I don't know anyone else like this, who prefers the darkness. I think we must have reverse seasonal affective disorder on a daily basis, lol. People talk about how they love to get up and spend the day at a lake, fear the darkness. It's the opposite for me - the darkness, I find to be comforting and sheltering an kind.
Thank for the topic. As always, I'm not alone.
BipolarPrincess
05-13-2009, 12:25 AM
I am that way, too. I can't sleep before 3,4,5 - even 8 or 9 a.m.
I look forward to darkness coming. As neondreams says, it's quite, no phone calls, no noise, no bright lights that are too much for my eyes, and no more of that constant over-stimulation of the senses.
I dread the coming of the light, too. Now, it's a bit different, since I am a passionate gardener (read "gardening maniac"), so in the afternoons, I work outside when I can - then, the light is welcome, not to me, but for my plants.
I don't know anyone else like this, who prefers the darkness. I think we must have reverse seasonal affective disorder on a daily basis, lol. People talk about how they love to get up and spend the day at a lake, fear the darkness. It's the opposite for me - the darkness, I find to be comforting and sheltering an kind.
Thank for the topic. As always, I'm not alone.
hahaha. reverse SAD on a daily basis. I do love to swim and spend days at lakes when Im feeling happy, but my depression has me so down I don't care about anything, I want to be alone at night and I am more peaceful. I know it's not "healthy"..nothing I am doing right now is healthy. Can't help it though. I feel like a lost soul....
I look forward to darkness coming. As neondreams says, it's quite, no phone calls, no noise, no bright lights that are too much for my eyes, and no more of that constant over-stimulation of the senses.
I dread the coming of the light, too. Now, it's a bit different, since I am a passionate gardener (read "gardening maniac"), so in the afternoons, I work outside when I can - then, the light is welcome, not to me, but for my plants.
I don't know anyone else like this, who prefers the darkness. I think we must have reverse seasonal affective disorder on a daily basis, lol. People talk about how they love to get up and spend the day at a lake, fear the darkness. It's the opposite for me - the darkness, I find to be comforting and sheltering an kind.
Thank for the topic. As always, I'm not alone.
hahaha. reverse SAD on a daily basis. I do love to swim and spend days at lakes when Im feeling happy, but my depression has me so down I don't care about anything, I want to be alone at night and I am more peaceful. I know it's not "healthy"..nothing I am doing right now is healthy. Can't help it though. I feel like a lost soul....
dreams in neon
05-13-2009, 01:05 AM
Seaturtle,
I've read that the circadian rhythm of people with bipolar is vastly different than those who do not have the disorder. It is said that many people with bipolar prefer to stay up all night. Part of this is due to mania or hypomania, but the other part has to do with the "natural" internal clock of those who have bipolar.
Once again I am up late. It's 11:05pm here and I don't feel like sleeping.
Over the past several days, I haven't fallen asleep until 12:30 or 1am which is better than my sleep patterns a few weeks ago. At that time, I stayed up until 5:30 or 6am. I don't know if that was a sign of impending mania or whether I just wanted to stay up all night because I enjoy it. For all I know, it could be a combination of both.
I've read that the circadian rhythm of people with bipolar is vastly different than those who do not have the disorder. It is said that many people with bipolar prefer to stay up all night. Part of this is due to mania or hypomania, but the other part has to do with the "natural" internal clock of those who have bipolar.
Once again I am up late. It's 11:05pm here and I don't feel like sleeping.
Over the past several days, I haven't fallen asleep until 12:30 or 1am which is better than my sleep patterns a few weeks ago. At that time, I stayed up until 5:30 or 6am. I don't know if that was a sign of impending mania or whether I just wanted to stay up all night because I enjoy it. For all I know, it could be a combination of both.
seaturtle
05-14-2009, 12:16 AM
Thanks for that info, neondreams, I didn't know that about the sleep cycle being related to the bp.
I'm underslept right now. I've committed to a project I really want to do, but it means getting up way before my usual rising time. Getting up early doesn't help me sleep, I just get underslept. I can't seem to change my sleep cycle.
I hope you're doing all right.
Bunnylover, I think Dreams is right. Therapy and some DBT will probably help you see others in perspective. I think sometimes we expect so much of others (and ourselves) that we can find everyone lacking.
I'm underslept right now. I've committed to a project I really want to do, but it means getting up way before my usual rising time. Getting up early doesn't help me sleep, I just get underslept. I can't seem to change my sleep cycle.
I hope you're doing all right.
Bunnylover, I think Dreams is right. Therapy and some DBT will probably help you see others in perspective. I think sometimes we expect so much of others (and ourselves) that we can find everyone lacking.
dreams in neon
05-14-2009, 12:38 AM
Thanks for that info, neondreams, I didn't know that about the sleep cycle being related to the bp.
I'm underslept right now. I've committed to a project I really want to do, but it means getting up way before my usual rising time. Getting up early doesn't help me sleep, I just get underslept. I can't seem to change my sleep cycle.
I hope you're doing all right.
Bunnylover, I think Dreams is right. Therapy and some DBT will probably help you see others in perspective. I think sometimes we expect so much of others (and ourselves) that we can find everyone lacking.
I'm doing pretty well Seaturtle.
However, I'm thinking about tweaking my meds or changing my mood stabilizer given the mixed episode I had last week and the severe depression I felt the week before.
I have an appointment with my pdoc on the 19th. When I spoke to him on Monday, it sounded like he wants to make changes to my meds as well, but we'll see. I'll keep you updated on what happens.
I'm sorry you've been unable to sleep. Do you take a sleep med at all? If not, perhaps you can ask your pdoc for one at least until you return to a more consistent sleep pattern.
I'm underslept right now. I've committed to a project I really want to do, but it means getting up way before my usual rising time. Getting up early doesn't help me sleep, I just get underslept. I can't seem to change my sleep cycle.
I hope you're doing all right.
Bunnylover, I think Dreams is right. Therapy and some DBT will probably help you see others in perspective. I think sometimes we expect so much of others (and ourselves) that we can find everyone lacking.
I'm doing pretty well Seaturtle.
However, I'm thinking about tweaking my meds or changing my mood stabilizer given the mixed episode I had last week and the severe depression I felt the week before.
I have an appointment with my pdoc on the 19th. When I spoke to him on Monday, it sounded like he wants to make changes to my meds as well, but we'll see. I'll keep you updated on what happens.
I'm sorry you've been unable to sleep. Do you take a sleep med at all? If not, perhaps you can ask your pdoc for one at least until you return to a more consistent sleep pattern.
katlin09
05-14-2009, 06:15 PM
Thanks for that info, neondreams, I didn't know that about the sleep cycle being related to the bp.
I'm underslept right now. I've committed to a project I really want to do, but it means getting up way before my usual rising time. Getting up early doesn't help me sleep, I just get underslept. I can't seem to change my sleep cycle.
I hope you're doing all right.
Bunnylover, I think Dreams is right. Therapy and some DBT will probably help you see others in perspective. I think sometimes we expect so much of others (and ourselves) that we can find everyone lacking.
Seaturtle,
I hope your sleep system gets itself straight soon, I know how bad it can be. I just started a DBT Group 2 weeks ago and so far it's okay.
Kat
I'm underslept right now. I've committed to a project I really want to do, but it means getting up way before my usual rising time. Getting up early doesn't help me sleep, I just get underslept. I can't seem to change my sleep cycle.
I hope you're doing all right.
Bunnylover, I think Dreams is right. Therapy and some DBT will probably help you see others in perspective. I think sometimes we expect so much of others (and ourselves) that we can find everyone lacking.
Seaturtle,
I hope your sleep system gets itself straight soon, I know how bad it can be. I just started a DBT Group 2 weeks ago and so far it's okay.
Kat