Maree
04-02-2002, 09:09 AM
Hi All. I have had this fear for as long as I can remember. Not only am I afraid to vomit myself - but if I hear or see anyone else vomiting I go into hysterics and have to block my ears and eyes. I can't watch movies that have scenes with vomiting and I avoid places like theme parks and bars. I know I am not alone in having this - but it would be nice to be taken seriously. People say "No one LIKES vomiting" which I know is true - but this is an actual phobia and fear which I would like to overcome before I have children...
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Zafu
04-02-2002, 09:38 AM
Hi Maree,
Emetophobia is a very real and wide-spread phobia.
Have you seen this thread on this very board?
http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/Forum98/HTML/000009.html
Best wishes
Zafu
[This message has been edited by Zafu (edited 04-02-2002).]
Emetophobia is a very real and wide-spread phobia.
Have you seen this thread on this very board?
http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/Forum98/HTML/000009.html
Best wishes
Zafu
[This message has been edited by Zafu (edited 04-02-2002).]
Maree
04-02-2002, 09:54 AM
thank you for replying! yes i did see the thread, but those people seemed to be more afraid of themselves vomiting. I am petrified - and that is the best word to describe it - of both. the last time i vomited i cried so much i gave myself an asthma attack and had to be admitted to hospital. while i was there i was more worried about seeing or hearing someone vomit than i was about myself. it just seems as though no one understands and everyone thinks it is a joke or attention seeking.
Zafu
04-02-2002, 10:36 AM
Maree,
Like all phobias what you have is treatable. Have you spoken to your doctor about counselling/therapy for it? There is almost certainly a root cause to your phobia that, once realised, can be mentally released and the problem cured.
Are you actually fearful or more revulsed by these situations?
Zafu
Like all phobias what you have is treatable. Have you spoken to your doctor about counselling/therapy for it? There is almost certainly a root cause to your phobia that, once realised, can be mentally released and the problem cured.
Are you actually fearful or more revulsed by these situations?
Zafu
Bunbunella
04-26-2002, 10:47 PM
I have extremly similar problem . when i was in elementary skool kids used to puke or feel sick and I would run around or out of the room, sometimes in tears. I get very nervous and jittery when people say there gonna puke or throwup. things like carnivals are like he*ll for me. like i can puke myself but not with ne won else doin it. I think my prob might be this. when i was younger i slept on bunk beds w/ my bro. and he used to get sick off the top bunk..he did have control and so i would completly flip and grab all my sheat and run for my mom.
planes are also bad places for me b/c there always barfin in the bags
planes are also bad places for me b/c there always barfin in the bags
Bunbunella
04-26-2002, 10:48 PM
sorry he did *not have control over his puking lol
Jerseygirl
06-19-2002, 12:14 PM
I know this is an old post, but I just had to reply to this! I am PETRIFIED of it!! If someone even says they are sick (that I don't even SEE - maybe it's on the phone or whatever) I can't eat and have trouble sleeping. The last time I threw up was in 1968!! Once in a while I relive that day like it was yesterday - almost like a post traumatic stress thing!!! I FEEL it, I start shaking inside, I know every single detail of that day. Just typing this now is getting me upset.. I will avoid ANYTHING to come in contact with a sick person. When I hear of a bad disease, I always ask, "Does it affect the stomach? They may say "No, but it can be fatal" - I say, "As long as you don't throw up!" and I'm serious!
Is anyone THIS bad? And Maree, I too will block my ears and eyes and won't look at a "throw up" scene in a movie or TV show. I didn't get over the fear before I had my daughter, and somehow you get through it. Realize that MOST stomach problems are from bad food and that can be controlled 90% of the time. You can control how you prepare your food and if you are out, get something "safe". Nothing is 100% safe, but you can get something safER... (ie: a hot dog over a tuna salad!) Wash dishes with a paper towel instead of a bacteria filled sponge, things like that.
Is anyone THIS bad? And Maree, I too will block my ears and eyes and won't look at a "throw up" scene in a movie or TV show. I didn't get over the fear before I had my daughter, and somehow you get through it. Realize that MOST stomach problems are from bad food and that can be controlled 90% of the time. You can control how you prepare your food and if you are out, get something "safe". Nothing is 100% safe, but you can get something safER... (ie: a hot dog over a tuna salad!) Wash dishes with a paper towel instead of a bacteria filled sponge, things like that.
Jerseygirl
06-19-2002, 12:20 PM
I went to the link Zafu provided, but it was a link on schizophrenia!
Zafu
06-19-2002, 05:00 PM
Aha, the mods have been moving the boards around.....
It was right when I posted it....sorry :(
Zafu http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/clown.gif
It was right when I posted it....sorry :(
Zafu http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/clown.gif
Sehsun
07-04-2002, 07:56 PM
I am also afraid of vomit. When I hear people say they are going to throw up, I cover my ears. If I had to see it, I would close my eyes, too. The last time I threw up was in '95. I did not throw up a lot, but I hate feeling like I'm going to throw up. When other people feel like vomiting, I do, too. Either that, or I won't have an appetite. If I get married and/or have kids, my main fear is that I won't be able to help them when they are about to throw up.
sweetypi
09-28-2002, 01:57 AM
I have a terrible fear of vomitting. I have 2 children and it's so hard for me to take care of them when they are sick. Fortunately, whenever my kids have been sick my husband has been here to deal with it. I can clean it up but if I hear them throwing up I get very excited and nervous. I start to sweat and then I can't sleep all night. Does anyone have any suggestions? This fear is totally running my life. I don't even have a job because I'm afraid of getting the flu. I won't let my son play outside when it's cold because I'm afraid he will get sick and throw up. I won't babysit my nieces if one of them is sick because I couldn't handle it if they threw up and I was taking care of them. I need help!
Jerseygirl
09-28-2002, 11:38 AM
I too couldn't sleep all night if my daughter got sick (or even said her stomach hurt, then I'd be AFRAID she MAY throw up!) I'd suggest taking a Xanax that night, it'll relax you enough to get some sleep and make it easier to deal with. I'm sure a doctor an prescribe something for you.
sweetypi
09-29-2002, 04:17 PM
Jerseygirl,
Thanks so much for the advice. I've been seriously considering seeing a doctor for this. It may be the best solution for me. In the meantime, since my son is sick now, I'll give the med a try. Thanks again.
Thanks so much for the advice. I've been seriously considering seeing a doctor for this. It may be the best solution for me. In the meantime, since my son is sick now, I'll give the med a try. Thanks again.
okiegirl
11-09-2002, 11:32 PM
I know this is an old posting, but I just read it and I can totally relate! I also have a fear of vomiting, and the more I talk to people I realize it isn't as uncommon as I thought. My phobia has gotten really bad in the last few months...triggered by taking care of my mom this spring when she had a really bad case of food poisoning (hospitalized for 4 days!) Anyway, I'm seeing a counselor, taking an antidepressant, and trying to get my life back. But this phobia really does affect your life...scared to get pregnant (morning sickness), avoid sick people like the plague (especially if it is a stomach virus), if I've been around someone who is sick, I won't eat for a few days for fear of throwing up too...is that weird or what!? But counseling is helping and I think I'm making progress.
sweetypi
11-24-2002, 12:45 AM
Okiegirl,
This isn't really weird at all. I too have a severe problem with emitophobia but since I've been reading some posts on here and doing some research I've noticed a big change. My son, for the past 2 years, during the winter gets a cold so bad that he coughs so hard he throws up. This happens just about every night for almost 6 months. We are taking him to see a specialist because we know this isn't "normal" but for some reason I'm almost "getting use to it". I think the more my kids are sick and throwing up the more I can handle it. I don't get as nervous as I use to when my kids were sick. I'm much calmer now. I know it's hard.......I've dealt with this for over 20 years! A lot of things in my life would change drastically if I didn't have this fear but I'm afraid I'm gonna have to kick it on my own. If you need to talk some more, don't be afraid to vent here. Take care!
Sweety
This isn't really weird at all. I too have a severe problem with emitophobia but since I've been reading some posts on here and doing some research I've noticed a big change. My son, for the past 2 years, during the winter gets a cold so bad that he coughs so hard he throws up. This happens just about every night for almost 6 months. We are taking him to see a specialist because we know this isn't "normal" but for some reason I'm almost "getting use to it". I think the more my kids are sick and throwing up the more I can handle it. I don't get as nervous as I use to when my kids were sick. I'm much calmer now. I know it's hard.......I've dealt with this for over 20 years! A lot of things in my life would change drastically if I didn't have this fear but I'm afraid I'm gonna have to kick it on my own. If you need to talk some more, don't be afraid to vent here. Take care!
Sweety
Anonymity
11-26-2002, 06:24 PM
This isn't exactly the same thing, but I am afraid of being alone while vomiting because I am TERRIFIED of choking on it!
My psychiatrist even told me that there is no way that a conscious person who is sitting upright can choke and die on their own vomit. She said only unconscious persons who are lying down and extremely helpless persons (very feeble elderly, very small children, invalids, etc.) can choke on it and actually suffocate.
So, any time I'm sick, I try to tell myself over and over that it's impossible for me to choke on it, but it doesn't really help. I HAVE to have someone nearby; I will totally PANIC about vomiting alone! I insist that my mom, fiance, or whoever is near me while I vomit. It's totally embarrassing for me, but, the closer the better. I am the most comforted (and embarrassed) if someone lays a hand gently on my back while I'm vomiting.
Vomit, in a physical sense, and the sensation of vomiting don't bother me. I don't like it, but I get over it. Also, seeing/hearing/etc. someone else vomit makes me queasy, but no more than a normal person.
My only abnormality is this fixation on the link between vomiting, choking, and suffocation.
Does anyone else feel this way? This isn't ruining my life by any means, but I would like to move past it if possible. I should probably bring it up again with my psychiatrist, but... its an awkward topic.
Thoughts?
My psychiatrist even told me that there is no way that a conscious person who is sitting upright can choke and die on their own vomit. She said only unconscious persons who are lying down and extremely helpless persons (very feeble elderly, very small children, invalids, etc.) can choke on it and actually suffocate.
So, any time I'm sick, I try to tell myself over and over that it's impossible for me to choke on it, but it doesn't really help. I HAVE to have someone nearby; I will totally PANIC about vomiting alone! I insist that my mom, fiance, or whoever is near me while I vomit. It's totally embarrassing for me, but, the closer the better. I am the most comforted (and embarrassed) if someone lays a hand gently on my back while I'm vomiting.
Vomit, in a physical sense, and the sensation of vomiting don't bother me. I don't like it, but I get over it. Also, seeing/hearing/etc. someone else vomit makes me queasy, but no more than a normal person.
My only abnormality is this fixation on the link between vomiting, choking, and suffocation.
Does anyone else feel this way? This isn't ruining my life by any means, but I would like to move past it if possible. I should probably bring it up again with my psychiatrist, but... its an awkward topic.
Thoughts?
okiegirl
11-26-2002, 08:09 PM
Sweety:
Thanks for your reply. It does help to know that there are people out there with the same anxieties, and that they can get better over time. I too have often thought that once I have kids, that will help me to overcome this fear. I know my kids will get sick from time to time, and I will have to/want to take care of them...so maybe in that process, it will help me to overcome this fear. I sure hope so anyway. I never in a million years thought I would be affected by a phobia such as this. Thank goodness I have a very supportive family and husband...I hope you have a good support system as well. Thanks again for the encouragement.
Thanks for your reply. It does help to know that there are people out there with the same anxieties, and that they can get better over time. I too have often thought that once I have kids, that will help me to overcome this fear. I know my kids will get sick from time to time, and I will have to/want to take care of them...so maybe in that process, it will help me to overcome this fear. I sure hope so anyway. I never in a million years thought I would be affected by a phobia such as this. Thank goodness I have a very supportive family and husband...I hope you have a good support system as well. Thanks again for the encouragement.
sweetypi
11-27-2002, 02:50 PM
Okiegirl,
I'm glad I could give you some reassurance! Trust me, I'm a FREAK when it comes to vomitting. I can't remember ever throwing up from the flu. I only remember throwing up 2 times and it was because of drinking. I was so out of it that I don't really remember it.....just a little. Like I said before, my son was sick last year for 6 months straight and he coughed so hard he threw up. He did this at least 3 times a week and thankfully my husband was always here during those times so he could help. I can't handle holding my son (he's almost 3) when he throws up. My daughter (who's 9 months) had a few episodes about 2 weeks ago where she'd cough and throw up and it didn't bother me AT ALL! And when my son throws up I don't mind cleaning up the mess......that doesn't bother me at all anymore......it just bothers me to see him doing it or more so to HEAR him. I hate it! But I am getting better and have had no therapy or any other treatment. I have considered seeing a therapist to see what can be done because it still prevents me from getting a job so I guess I'll have to work on that. But for now I'm holding up and we're in the flu season now so I guess well see what happens! Thanks for talking!
Sweety
I'm glad I could give you some reassurance! Trust me, I'm a FREAK when it comes to vomitting. I can't remember ever throwing up from the flu. I only remember throwing up 2 times and it was because of drinking. I was so out of it that I don't really remember it.....just a little. Like I said before, my son was sick last year for 6 months straight and he coughed so hard he threw up. He did this at least 3 times a week and thankfully my husband was always here during those times so he could help. I can't handle holding my son (he's almost 3) when he throws up. My daughter (who's 9 months) had a few episodes about 2 weeks ago where she'd cough and throw up and it didn't bother me AT ALL! And when my son throws up I don't mind cleaning up the mess......that doesn't bother me at all anymore......it just bothers me to see him doing it or more so to HEAR him. I hate it! But I am getting better and have had no therapy or any other treatment. I have considered seeing a therapist to see what can be done because it still prevents me from getting a job so I guess I'll have to work on that. But for now I'm holding up and we're in the flu season now so I guess well see what happens! Thanks for talking!
Sweety
54321
01-01-2003, 04:46 PM
hiya, my mum had a very bad vomit phobia, she would never take me to france or IOW just incase someone was sick on the ferry, although she really wanted to go. BUt its getting better, i have an illness which causes me to vomit all the time and shes grandualy getting used to it, so it is possible to eventually over come it
good luck
good luck
garysgirl16
11-12-2004, 09:57 AM
Ok, I know its been a year since anyone posted on this.....but I found this site through this thread by searching for emitophobia on google, and I just have to reply. I'm an emitophobe too.
( I actually have an appt with my doctor today to try and convince him to give me a script for phenergan b/c the tummy bug is roaming around here and I want a "just in case")
Anyway, I know exactly where my phobia came from. I was "abused" as a child, ironically by therapists and my parents who were trying to cure my behavioral problems when I was a kid.
They suprised me one day by making me lay down on a blanket surrounded by eight adults and they grabbed my hands, feet, and head and sort of dogpiled me. I couldn't move, I had a hard time breathing, and the weight on my tiny little chest was enormous. ( I was seven). Nobody said a word or told me what was going on, and i literally thought I was being murdered. I screamed for my life and nobody said a word.
This went on for two hours of me screaming and crying when they finally let me up and told me to hug my mom ( yeah right *****!) and told me that they werent' trying to kill me, it was just "new age bonding therapy" trying to revert me back to the helpless stages of infancy so I could "bond" with my parents.
This went on every friday for a couple of years. I suffered SEVERE anxiety attacks on thursday nights in anticipation. They would pin me down and completely take away any physical control of my body and bog me down with adults laying on me....the pressure kept me from being able to breath well and the weight sometimes made me vomit. The would not let me up to puke, just turn my head. I was made to pee on myself also. Sometimes they would wrap a towel over my face ( TERROR) or put ants on my face. When I got dehydrated they would finally sometimes offer me some water, but I would be so dehydrated that I would promptly vomit it back up.
I cannot explain the dread, TERROR, or the feelings that I went through with this, but any emitophobe will understand that the feelings you go through right before you are about to vomit and while actually having to suffer through it, is exactly how and what I felt during these experiences.
That is where my fear of vomiting originated, during these long hours of terror, vomiting, fear of dying and smothering, and complete loss of control to these monstrous people that were supposed to be loving me.
The last time that I was really sick was when I was 12 and I got food poisoning on christmas eve, and they put me out in a trailer in the driveway alone and I threw up all night by myself.
I have since gagged a couple of times from drinking in college, my pregnancy, and last year when I had a kidney infection and fever, but I have not been really sick with vomiting in 12 years.
Jersygirl you give me hope, lol. Please tell me you still haven't thrown up since 1968!!
*sigh* This fear is ruling my life....i think about voming or something related probably every two minutes. Seriously. But it is usually only this bad around this time of year, because this is the time of year that all that **** happened to me. Things usually get better in the spring, but I have the hardest time getting through november and december and january.
I can't eat, sleep, I have anxiety attacks, and fear of dying. Sheesh.
Can anyone offer up some advice?
Thanks!
( I actually have an appt with my doctor today to try and convince him to give me a script for phenergan b/c the tummy bug is roaming around here and I want a "just in case")
Anyway, I know exactly where my phobia came from. I was "abused" as a child, ironically by therapists and my parents who were trying to cure my behavioral problems when I was a kid.
They suprised me one day by making me lay down on a blanket surrounded by eight adults and they grabbed my hands, feet, and head and sort of dogpiled me. I couldn't move, I had a hard time breathing, and the weight on my tiny little chest was enormous. ( I was seven). Nobody said a word or told me what was going on, and i literally thought I was being murdered. I screamed for my life and nobody said a word.
This went on for two hours of me screaming and crying when they finally let me up and told me to hug my mom ( yeah right *****!) and told me that they werent' trying to kill me, it was just "new age bonding therapy" trying to revert me back to the helpless stages of infancy so I could "bond" with my parents.
This went on every friday for a couple of years. I suffered SEVERE anxiety attacks on thursday nights in anticipation. They would pin me down and completely take away any physical control of my body and bog me down with adults laying on me....the pressure kept me from being able to breath well and the weight sometimes made me vomit. The would not let me up to puke, just turn my head. I was made to pee on myself also. Sometimes they would wrap a towel over my face ( TERROR) or put ants on my face. When I got dehydrated they would finally sometimes offer me some water, but I would be so dehydrated that I would promptly vomit it back up.
I cannot explain the dread, TERROR, or the feelings that I went through with this, but any emitophobe will understand that the feelings you go through right before you are about to vomit and while actually having to suffer through it, is exactly how and what I felt during these experiences.
That is where my fear of vomiting originated, during these long hours of terror, vomiting, fear of dying and smothering, and complete loss of control to these monstrous people that were supposed to be loving me.
The last time that I was really sick was when I was 12 and I got food poisoning on christmas eve, and they put me out in a trailer in the driveway alone and I threw up all night by myself.
I have since gagged a couple of times from drinking in college, my pregnancy, and last year when I had a kidney infection and fever, but I have not been really sick with vomiting in 12 years.
Jersygirl you give me hope, lol. Please tell me you still haven't thrown up since 1968!!
*sigh* This fear is ruling my life....i think about voming or something related probably every two minutes. Seriously. But it is usually only this bad around this time of year, because this is the time of year that all that **** happened to me. Things usually get better in the spring, but I have the hardest time getting through november and december and january.
I can't eat, sleep, I have anxiety attacks, and fear of dying. Sheesh.
Can anyone offer up some advice?
Thanks!
Chloegirl7
05-25-2006, 01:57 AM
As a few people have already said, this thread is pretty old but I feel compelled to post b/c I also have this phobia. I've had it for more than 20 years. I let it get in the way and have since I was 11 or 12 years old. I had a violent episode as a child and I suffered panic attacks throughout my childhood and even as an adult. My husband and I have been together for over 11 years and we want to be a family but I'm too afraid to get pregnant. I'm 32 and I feel like I'm running out of time. I can't even imagine how other Emetophobes get pregnant. How they have the courage to take that bold move to get pregnant and face pregnancy sickness. I haven't worked in 7 years. I always did retail and worked with the public and now I fear it so much that when I get a job I blow it off b/c I get panicky all the way there or once I'm there and clocked in. Or I can't sleep the night before if I'm scheduled for the next day. Okay, am I the only one that finds this guy right here -> :bouncing: very annoying? He's an icon smiley off to the right of the post board and he's really distracting me from my post, lol. Anyway, I just felt the need to vent my feelings about this stupid phobia. I definitely feel it's a control issue. Because when I had my traumatic experience (nothing like that last girl that posted, God bless your heart! My heart really went out to you. I'm so sorry you went through that.), I was a child and I fought the urge to vomit. My Grampa kept trying to get me to come to the toilet but I refused, thinking that if I stayed where I was I'd be okay and it wouldn't happen. But it happened anyway. I had no control over it. And my over-protective mother, for the next 20+ years, has continued to try and control my life. She still asks me to call her when I get home. She was raped by a family member when she was a young girl and so she grew up afraid of everything. She still is. She won't be alone, won't drive alone. And so she projects onto me her fears and her views that the world is a horrible and dangerous place. I was anorexic as a teen. Never bulimic, of course. She's a perfectionist and now so am I. It's aggravating. I pray some day I'll be able to afford therapy on a regular basis. Thanks for reading...
Jaedyn
05-25-2006, 12:47 PM
I too have a very big fear of vomitting. I will beg my friends not to get sick. If someone drinks too much and gets sick I will beg them to hold it in. I just feel like if they wait it will pass and they will be ok. I of course do not throw up myself. If by chance the urge is too great I will have to be completely alone and out of ear shot from everyone. I am terrified of people seeing or hearing me throw up. I do not know where this fear came from but I definitly have panic attacks when I think about people getting sick. Even if somone calls and tells me they have the flu or they drank too much and I am not there I still freak and panic about them getting sick. I worry so much. I get so angry when people drink too much and it makes them sick. I tell them they are irresponsible and they should know better and how come they can't read their own bodies and they are so stupid for getting themselves that way. Didnt realize this was a real phobia though. Crazy! Thanks!
sunbronzedbabe
06-15-2006, 02:44 PM
Wow..I had no idea that there were so many other people out the who were soo scared of vomiting!! I must say that I too have this problem. However, my problem didn't start until the beginning of this year (about 6 months ago).
At the end of last year I got really sick from what I think was bad food, because everyone around me got sick too. But anyways it was one of those things where it's coming out of both ends. At that time, I hadn't thrown up for probably 10 years, but the couple of times I threw up as a kid they were really bad memories that I could easily describe very vividly if I had to. Anyways after I got sick that time last year, I started to become a little nervous thinking to myself that I could throw up at any moment because when I got sick it happened so quickly from me feeling perfectly happy go lucky during the afternoon to feeling horrible that night.
Well then at the beginning of the next year I started getting sick way more then io ever had! It went from me having diarhea all the time ( sorry for all of you who just read that, but I feel it is important) to me feeling neasuous all the time to me worrying that I might be pregnant and this might be morning sickness, to me worrying that I had lactose intolerance or Chrone's or Irritable Bowel Syndrome ( anything to put me under some type of category so that I might be relieved to know what it is). Well I never found out what "IT" was, and now I feel very traumitized because I lost weight at the beggining for fear of eating anything that could possibly make my stomach not feel good. I also didn't feel like I had alot of support throughout this whole ordeal because my family and boyfriend didn't know how I was feeling on the inside, and then when I finally told them I guess to get their emotional support, I felt repetitive and they would tell me that they dont know what I want them to do. And to tall you the truth, I dont really know what I expected through this.
Now, 6 months later, I am constantly concerned by anything and I mean ANYTHING that could possibly mean an illness for me, especially one that could make me throw up. Whether it's my stomach feeling a little weird or a bad taste in my mouth I start to panic. I now get panic/anxiety attacks over this every now and then and I am trying so hard to keep a normal life. However once I am having a good timeand I forget about this nagging idea of mine, I revert back to this side of me really fast. I even think now that I bring stomach aches on myself because of my anxiety over this!!
I also am really nervous about morning sickness when I get pregnant!! All my life I have wanted children and now I cant stop wondering how I am going to deal with being sick all the time. I have the feeling that because I am so nervous with this, that I am going to be one of those woman who have mrning sickness so bad that there's a certain name for it, but I forgot what it was. You know when they have morning sickness so bad that they can't even keep water down?
Well for the people who have had therapy, can you tell me what that entails exactly. I get the feeling that your going to be forced to throw up and I am so worried about that!! I know that it is better to face your fears, but gosh I just dont know how to handle the thought of throwing up.
Well for those of you who have read all the way through this and could offer some help or advice I would really appreciate it!
At the end of last year I got really sick from what I think was bad food, because everyone around me got sick too. But anyways it was one of those things where it's coming out of both ends. At that time, I hadn't thrown up for probably 10 years, but the couple of times I threw up as a kid they were really bad memories that I could easily describe very vividly if I had to. Anyways after I got sick that time last year, I started to become a little nervous thinking to myself that I could throw up at any moment because when I got sick it happened so quickly from me feeling perfectly happy go lucky during the afternoon to feeling horrible that night.
Well then at the beginning of the next year I started getting sick way more then io ever had! It went from me having diarhea all the time ( sorry for all of you who just read that, but I feel it is important) to me feeling neasuous all the time to me worrying that I might be pregnant and this might be morning sickness, to me worrying that I had lactose intolerance or Chrone's or Irritable Bowel Syndrome ( anything to put me under some type of category so that I might be relieved to know what it is). Well I never found out what "IT" was, and now I feel very traumitized because I lost weight at the beggining for fear of eating anything that could possibly make my stomach not feel good. I also didn't feel like I had alot of support throughout this whole ordeal because my family and boyfriend didn't know how I was feeling on the inside, and then when I finally told them I guess to get their emotional support, I felt repetitive and they would tell me that they dont know what I want them to do. And to tall you the truth, I dont really know what I expected through this.
Now, 6 months later, I am constantly concerned by anything and I mean ANYTHING that could possibly mean an illness for me, especially one that could make me throw up. Whether it's my stomach feeling a little weird or a bad taste in my mouth I start to panic. I now get panic/anxiety attacks over this every now and then and I am trying so hard to keep a normal life. However once I am having a good timeand I forget about this nagging idea of mine, I revert back to this side of me really fast. I even think now that I bring stomach aches on myself because of my anxiety over this!!
I also am really nervous about morning sickness when I get pregnant!! All my life I have wanted children and now I cant stop wondering how I am going to deal with being sick all the time. I have the feeling that because I am so nervous with this, that I am going to be one of those woman who have mrning sickness so bad that there's a certain name for it, but I forgot what it was. You know when they have morning sickness so bad that they can't even keep water down?
Well for the people who have had therapy, can you tell me what that entails exactly. I get the feeling that your going to be forced to throw up and I am so worried about that!! I know that it is better to face your fears, but gosh I just dont know how to handle the thought of throwing up.
Well for those of you who have read all the way through this and could offer some help or advice I would really appreciate it!