Hi, Liz. I hope and pray you will be able to summon up the stremgth to stay quit. The same family members you now feel excluded from, will one day possibly suffering from various lung/heart problems. That will be one group you will be happy to be excluded from! Also, your symptoms are scary. Do you know that you younger you start smoking, the more damage you do to your lungs? I have read many times, that people who start smoking before they turn 18, are more suseptable to dying an early death from cigarette smoking. It has something to do with young people's lungs developing: how cigarettes intereferes with the normal growth process. You started smoking so young. You have got to give up the cigarettes. I know, its hard. But having good health is precious. You can't change anything another person decides to do. My own family smoked very heavily also. I know that contributed to my own smoking habit. But ultimately, we are responsible for ourselves. I watched my father die from lung cancer. It's a horrendous habit; cigarette smoking. The longer you stay quit, the easier it'll get. People are remarkable: they adjust to what is in their envirement. You will one day not even miss cigarettes. You'll be ablt to talk on the phone; whatever you used to do with cigarettes, you CAN do without them. It just takes some time to get used to the change. Many people can't stay quit long enough to make it to that point. But you CAN do it, Liz. You can have all the interaction with your family you want: you don't need cigarettes to be close to them. Who knows: maybe if you can be a sucessful quitter, you will inspire other family members to quit also, eventually. Plus, your symptoms, and the fact that you started smoking at such a young age, is a serious matter. You can reverse the damage done to your lungs, if you want to bad enough. I hope you can stay quit. Nothing in life that is worthwhile is easy. And this is SO worthwhile, Liz. Its the best gift you can give yourself....Take care...Debbie