HERMIT
06-02-2003, 11:17 PM
Surgery in the Critical care ward? I woke up after surgery with that big drain tube down my throat to clear fluid from being under 18 hours. The nurse would take her sweet time when I started to thrash and gurgle. I was like that for 3 days and still have nightmares about it.
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franjo
06-03-2003, 03:18 AM
Hermit~
I've had 15 surgeries, and after most of them I remember waking up in recovery with "the tube". Only once do I remember them actually taking it out while I was still awake. It's unnatural, to be sure, to have something like that down the throat. Mostly, it just makes me mad, because I'm still goofy and disoriented from the anesthesia. It's a helpless feeling, not being able to communicate just how pissed off I am with that thing in the way.
I don't think that I've ever had them keep it in for longer than a few hours though. I'm sure your throat was pretty sore after that. But that slow to react nurse....are you saying that you were thrashing as a result of not being able to breathe? If so, that's scary enough to make me have your nightmare! I keep thinking of a scene out of "Misery" or something.
If this was the case, and you were struggling for your life's breath, then you may have been traumatized and suffering from a temporary form of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. The nightmares, as you probably know, are your psyche's way of forcing you to deal with that. Most trauma's are too overwhelming to look at straight on, so our minds dose us with little snippets at a time. If the nightmares increase in intensity and/or frequency, you might consider seeking counseling.
The nurse, on the other hand, should consider a new line of work, if I understood your post correctly.
I hope your nightmares are only short-lived, and your experience with that will simply fade into the background over time.
Wishing you sweeter dreams,
~Teri
------------------
Spina-bifida occulta; Congenital Scoliosis (dextrorotatory and 'S' curve, 42 thorasic and 57 degrees lumbar); Meningomyelocele (split cord @ L1); Diastematomyelia (re-sectioned at L2-3); tethered cord @ S-3; cysts on cord; various developmental abnormalities of the spine: narrowing of all disk spaces, defects in posterior arches, ectasia of the spinal canal and dura, segmental disease, sclerosis in L. iliac bone and adjacent sacroiliac joint, unilateral osteitis condensans ilium, hypertrophic facet disease L4-5 and L5-S1.
Surgeries include, but not limited to:
Lumbar fusion-1968
Fusion with Herrington Rod instrumentation-1970
Femoral osteotomy-1971
Tethered cord release-1987
Rod removal-1987
Chiari-type pelvic osteotomy-1988
Trochanteric osteotomy-1989
I've had 15 surgeries, and after most of them I remember waking up in recovery with "the tube". Only once do I remember them actually taking it out while I was still awake. It's unnatural, to be sure, to have something like that down the throat. Mostly, it just makes me mad, because I'm still goofy and disoriented from the anesthesia. It's a helpless feeling, not being able to communicate just how pissed off I am with that thing in the way.
I don't think that I've ever had them keep it in for longer than a few hours though. I'm sure your throat was pretty sore after that. But that slow to react nurse....are you saying that you were thrashing as a result of not being able to breathe? If so, that's scary enough to make me have your nightmare! I keep thinking of a scene out of "Misery" or something.
If this was the case, and you were struggling for your life's breath, then you may have been traumatized and suffering from a temporary form of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. The nightmares, as you probably know, are your psyche's way of forcing you to deal with that. Most trauma's are too overwhelming to look at straight on, so our minds dose us with little snippets at a time. If the nightmares increase in intensity and/or frequency, you might consider seeking counseling.
The nurse, on the other hand, should consider a new line of work, if I understood your post correctly.
I hope your nightmares are only short-lived, and your experience with that will simply fade into the background over time.
Wishing you sweeter dreams,
~Teri
------------------
Spina-bifida occulta; Congenital Scoliosis (dextrorotatory and 'S' curve, 42 thorasic and 57 degrees lumbar); Meningomyelocele (split cord @ L1); Diastematomyelia (re-sectioned at L2-3); tethered cord @ S-3; cysts on cord; various developmental abnormalities of the spine: narrowing of all disk spaces, defects in posterior arches, ectasia of the spinal canal and dura, segmental disease, sclerosis in L. iliac bone and adjacent sacroiliac joint, unilateral osteitis condensans ilium, hypertrophic facet disease L4-5 and L5-S1.
Surgeries include, but not limited to:
Lumbar fusion-1968
Fusion with Herrington Rod instrumentation-1970
Femoral osteotomy-1971
Tethered cord release-1987
Rod removal-1987
Chiari-type pelvic osteotomy-1988
Trochanteric osteotomy-1989
Catherine with a C
06-03-2003, 04:10 AM
Teri,
Well said!!
Hermit! I am so sorry for your experience as a result of a no doubt scary situation!
Reliving an ordeal through dreams, awake or asleep, is indeed a direct result of trauma.
I have only read about scenarios such as yours!
Again, I stress how saddened I am that you are having to relive this experience.
***For what it is worth.........long story~~~~~~edited for the purpose of this post~~~~~
I am the survivor of a home invasion/theft/ sexual assault which took me months to realize that the A-hole had a knife to my throat the whole time.
The brain tends to, as Teri stated, only allow you as much as you personally can handle at the time.
I want you to realize that you are no longer "in" the moment!! Take control of your reality!! You survived!! You are truly an example of spirit!
Let it go!! Do not let the episode win!!
You are stronger than that!
I hope to hear from you soon.
Be strong!! Stay Blessed. And know that you are not alone!!
I hope your surgery was successful!!
Please post when you can!
Until later,
take care, cause we care.
Catherine
Well said!!
Hermit! I am so sorry for your experience as a result of a no doubt scary situation!
Reliving an ordeal through dreams, awake or asleep, is indeed a direct result of trauma.
I have only read about scenarios such as yours!
Again, I stress how saddened I am that you are having to relive this experience.
***For what it is worth.........long story~~~~~~edited for the purpose of this post~~~~~
I am the survivor of a home invasion/theft/ sexual assault which took me months to realize that the A-hole had a knife to my throat the whole time.
The brain tends to, as Teri stated, only allow you as much as you personally can handle at the time.
I want you to realize that you are no longer "in" the moment!! Take control of your reality!! You survived!! You are truly an example of spirit!
Let it go!! Do not let the episode win!!
You are stronger than that!
I hope to hear from you soon.
Be strong!! Stay Blessed. And know that you are not alone!!
I hope your surgery was successful!!
Please post when you can!
Until later,
take care, cause we care.
Catherine
Midge130
06-03-2003, 10:24 AM
Hermit, what a horrible :eek: experience!! I am sorry you had to go through that! Do as Teri said and try to get past it.
Yes, Teri, very well said!!!
Catherine, wow, I'm sorry that you went through what you did, how scary!! :eek: I'm glad you made it through alive and have not let it torment you for years.
Midge
Yes, Teri, very well said!!!
Catherine, wow, I'm sorry that you went through what you did, how scary!! :eek: I'm glad you made it through alive and have not let it torment you for years.
Midge
franjo
06-03-2003, 12:54 PM
Catherine~
I'm glad you replied to Hermit's post. If anyone should know about trauma, it'd be you. You are my poster child for survival and courageous spirit. Many times, it just comes down to choices...like you said, you can decide to let the experience win, or claim absolute victory for yourself. You are one strong gal. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/heart.gif
~Teri
I'm glad you replied to Hermit's post. If anyone should know about trauma, it'd be you. You are my poster child for survival and courageous spirit. Many times, it just comes down to choices...like you said, you can decide to let the experience win, or claim absolute victory for yourself. You are one strong gal. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/heart.gif
~Teri
Catherine with a C
06-03-2003, 02:30 PM
Thanks Teri!!!
Catherine
Catherine
melanie dawn
06-03-2003, 03:08 PM
Hermit,
what a horrible experience! Teri and Catharine answered and adressed your concerns so well. I can only say that as a nurse, i am saddened and disturbed by your experience . And apologize for the trauma that you suffered. It seems that not everyone that works with people should.
Mel
what a horrible experience! Teri and Catharine answered and adressed your concerns so well. I can only say that as a nurse, i am saddened and disturbed by your experience . And apologize for the trauma that you suffered. It seems that not everyone that works with people should.
Mel
HERMIT
06-03-2003, 07:32 PM
Thanks for all the kind answers. I had this surgery almost 10 years ago. The reason I asked is I still dream about it. I also have 2 accoustic neuromas that will need to be removed and also more spinal tumors to be taken out someday. I had the surgery done at the TO western Melanie. i mainy remember being awake for 2 days--my parents tell me that it was 2. My lungs would fill with fluid as a result of the anasthetic and would clog the tube? This happened often. to calm me down I was given shots but 4 hours later it was back to the drowning. My left arm was useless for almost a year and while in the hospital I did not eat as it was too much effort to use one arm. I guess the experience did traumatise me as I was supposed to be there 3 months and I walked out in 6 days under my own power. I was loaded into my buddies van onto a reclining lawnchair with no painkillers for the 6 hour drive home. All this with 148 staples up the back of my head. All the doc said was--"if you start leaking spinal fluid come back". I vowed never to have any surgery done again--and haven't. One surgeon says that is why I have lived so long with my disease. He is pushing me for surgery on my middle back but keep refusing. I still have all my functions and consider my self more fortunate than some. Anyways--thats my rant for today and just wondered if the tube experience was the norm.
PS I still dream about a girl in the bed across from me. I dunno if it was the drugs I was on but her toungue was swollen so bad it took up her entire mouth and was partway down her chest. Is that possible? As you can see--my present state of mind on surgery is --no more. When I get bad enough, I will go to my deer watch by the creek and go on my own terms. Hope I hve a few years before that decision.
For the ones that have endured many surgeries--you are true heroes in my eyes as I don't have the guts to do it again. Thanks for the replies. Sorry for the life story.
PS I still dream about a girl in the bed across from me. I dunno if it was the drugs I was on but her toungue was swollen so bad it took up her entire mouth and was partway down her chest. Is that possible? As you can see--my present state of mind on surgery is --no more. When I get bad enough, I will go to my deer watch by the creek and go on my own terms. Hope I hve a few years before that decision.
For the ones that have endured many surgeries--you are true heroes in my eyes as I don't have the guts to do it again. Thanks for the replies. Sorry for the life story.
franjo
06-04-2003, 05:10 AM
Hermit~
First of all, please don't ever be sorry to tell your story here. That is what we do best! :) What a long ordeal you went through! I have NO problem understanding why you wouldn't want to undergo surgery again. To tell you the truth, each one gets a little harder for me to face valiantly. But face it, I will, valor notwithstanding.
Surgery is, by its very nature, a traumatic event...emotionally and physically. After hearing your story, I'm sure you were pushed to the limit on both counts. (And that's not including your ride home!)
I wish you well, and will keep you in prayer...
~Teri
First of all, please don't ever be sorry to tell your story here. That is what we do best! :) What a long ordeal you went through! I have NO problem understanding why you wouldn't want to undergo surgery again. To tell you the truth, each one gets a little harder for me to face valiantly. But face it, I will, valor notwithstanding.
Surgery is, by its very nature, a traumatic event...emotionally and physically. After hearing your story, I'm sure you were pushed to the limit on both counts. (And that's not including your ride home!)
I wish you well, and will keep you in prayer...
~Teri
melanie dawn
06-04-2003, 02:54 PM
Hermit,
thank you for sharing your story with us. I am familiar with TO western. I have done done many ambulance runs there with patients from Niagara.
YOur esperience with the tube is not the norm. I work alot( i did, not working since July) in the OR / recovery room. The tube is used to assist breathing during surgery and anesthesia, to maintain an airway. This intubation is removed at the onset of recovery from anesthesia. We usually remove at the first onset of recovery, before the gag reflex returns or immediately at return. Unfortunately this intubation is also the same for anyone who is at risk of having airway difficulties,and needs a respirator for a short period. Therefore in ICU there are patients with respirators, but we usually keep them very sedated, almost in a coma to prevent them fighting the respirator. Then they need to be weaned of off it. This is not the norm for most surgeries, people awake with an irritated throat and never know about the tube/ have no memory of it.One of the things that anesthesia provides is amnesia.
So I am sorry that you had to recall this, but please it is not the norm. I am so saddened when I hear of these issues and experiences. I am a firm believer that no matter how traumatic , the staff can and should take the time to explain things and help to alleviate the panic and fear. The fluid you felt is also from the respirator, when you exhale there is alot of moisture in your breath, this can build up inthe tube and needs to be emptied. If not it can run back into the chest.
I understand your thoughts on more surgery. In 97 I was misdiagnosed and treated for a "severe flu". After having a 4 foot bowel resection after the gangrene had gone into my blood stream, they told my family , if I lived thru the first 24 hours the odds were in my favour. I swore never again, but now given the level of pain and rapid dysfunction, I am begging for the surgery for my neck. Which is so funny because here they are not into doing this surgery, so I am fighting for funding for the US.
Well as usual I just made a short answer into a novel. But I truly believe that the nursing staff and Dr's make all of the difference in the world during illness and surgery, not thru just the clinical skills but with compassion and the ability to reach out to the patients and answer their questions and provide emotional support and comfort their fears.
I am glad that you found this board, it is a safe place to outlet your fears and concerns. The group here is very special and composed of truly warm and compassionat people. Whereabouts do you live, 6 hours from To?
YOu have learned to live your life with dignity and strength, and i hope you will come to get over the nightmares from your past surgical experience.
Take care, hope to hear from you soon,
Mel
thank you for sharing your story with us. I am familiar with TO western. I have done done many ambulance runs there with patients from Niagara.
YOur esperience with the tube is not the norm. I work alot( i did, not working since July) in the OR / recovery room. The tube is used to assist breathing during surgery and anesthesia, to maintain an airway. This intubation is removed at the onset of recovery from anesthesia. We usually remove at the first onset of recovery, before the gag reflex returns or immediately at return. Unfortunately this intubation is also the same for anyone who is at risk of having airway difficulties,and needs a respirator for a short period. Therefore in ICU there are patients with respirators, but we usually keep them very sedated, almost in a coma to prevent them fighting the respirator. Then they need to be weaned of off it. This is not the norm for most surgeries, people awake with an irritated throat and never know about the tube/ have no memory of it.One of the things that anesthesia provides is amnesia.
So I am sorry that you had to recall this, but please it is not the norm. I am so saddened when I hear of these issues and experiences. I am a firm believer that no matter how traumatic , the staff can and should take the time to explain things and help to alleviate the panic and fear. The fluid you felt is also from the respirator, when you exhale there is alot of moisture in your breath, this can build up inthe tube and needs to be emptied. If not it can run back into the chest.
I understand your thoughts on more surgery. In 97 I was misdiagnosed and treated for a "severe flu". After having a 4 foot bowel resection after the gangrene had gone into my blood stream, they told my family , if I lived thru the first 24 hours the odds were in my favour. I swore never again, but now given the level of pain and rapid dysfunction, I am begging for the surgery for my neck. Which is so funny because here they are not into doing this surgery, so I am fighting for funding for the US.
Well as usual I just made a short answer into a novel. But I truly believe that the nursing staff and Dr's make all of the difference in the world during illness and surgery, not thru just the clinical skills but with compassion and the ability to reach out to the patients and answer their questions and provide emotional support and comfort their fears.
I am glad that you found this board, it is a safe place to outlet your fears and concerns. The group here is very special and composed of truly warm and compassionat people. Whereabouts do you live, 6 hours from To?
YOu have learned to live your life with dignity and strength, and i hope you will come to get over the nightmares from your past surgical experience.
Take care, hope to hear from you soon,
Mel
HERMIT
06-04-2003, 03:30 PM
Thanks Melanie and I am glad it is not the norm. That tube was not taken out at all after the surgery. I was also breathing on my own, but i guess 18 hours under sedation does something to the lungs--so it stayed in. When I built up fluid and started to "bubble" the nurse would come---slowly---and put a suction hose down the tube to drain it. It is nice to hear from a nurse who still realises that the patient is actually a human being. It seems to me that many docs and nurses get like people at other jobs--just doin the routine day after day.
As for the catheter--who invented that thing?? Just thinking about when she pulled that out----"shiver".
Anyways thanks to all for the support and hope everyone is having a good day. Beautiful sun today here and cut the grass for the first time. Why I bought a house with a whole acre of grass, I'll never know. Oh yeah-- at the time I used to live in a small town called Petawawa. I am now in New Brunswick and want to get back there as soon as possible. There is nowhere nicer than the ottawa valley!!
[This message has been edited by HERMIT (edited 06-04-2003).]
As for the catheter--who invented that thing?? Just thinking about when she pulled that out----"shiver".
Anyways thanks to all for the support and hope everyone is having a good day. Beautiful sun today here and cut the grass for the first time. Why I bought a house with a whole acre of grass, I'll never know. Oh yeah-- at the time I used to live in a small town called Petawawa. I am now in New Brunswick and want to get back there as soon as possible. There is nowhere nicer than the ottawa valley!!
[This message has been edited by HERMIT (edited 06-04-2003).]