stacynb

Hey there.

I always think about you. I hope you are getting some rest. I hope your kids are well.
I have been keeping busy. I had felt pretty good for a couple days, so I took my kids out to do as much as we could. Today I am not feeling so hot, but that's the price we pay for our children's happiness. "I'll have fun today and pay dearly tommorrow"
Thursday will be my last day at the Chiro, at least for a while. I was going to him for adjustments, drainage/cleansing with homeopathic drops, and JMT(bioenergetics)...I am choosing to stop treatment for a while and see if I can deal with the pain on my own. I have been contemplating whether or not to go on DMARD's or Enbrel, but until I have the $$ and proper insurance, I am going to try to fight it on my own somehow. I have a couple Dr appt's in the next couple weeks with my Dermatologist and a new Rheumatologist, so I will see what they have to say, but it seems like all my Dr.'s suggest the same types of treatment.
With school starting back up for my kids, I want to free up a lot of my time and get into a good routine so that I am a sane mother for the school year. I have been a stay -at -home mom with my youngest for the past few years, and I was taking care of another child in my home 'til earlier this year, but now her gymnastics place offers a mom's day out 2x a week, so I am going to get her in that if I can. I was hoping to feel good enough to start working again, but I just don't know. I don't know how you do it.

It's funny that you mentioned remembering what it was like to just get up and go ride a bike with no problems. I was just thinking the other day what I would do if I had no pain. The first physical thing I would do is go running, and I was envisioning myself doing a running round-off then a back handspring and a back flip. I was in gymnastics when I was younger and my kids have been in gymnastics, and I watch those kids on the bars and say to myself.. gosh, I would love to be able to do that just one more time.
At the gym, I am able to ride the stationary bike for a while without hurting too bad, so at least I can do some form of exercise.
I definitely don't take things for granted anymore. I am always thankful I can see, hear, taste and smell.
As much as I want to feel sorry for myself at times and it just blows my mind that this could happen to me, my lifestyle and my immediate family just don't give me the chance to let this disease get the best of me. I still do everything I can without help- Yardwork, shopping, running errands, household chores, taking care of the girls and the dog. Even though I need the help, I just don't want to be a burden on my family and since my parents, sibling, and friends all live in other states, it isn't really an option.
I still have a thought in the back of my mind that this is only due to 5th's disease and it will all go away one day. I am not in denial, but I still have been holding on to that thought... I guess it has made the year go by a little easier for me(having hope). I want to be proactive in my treatments, but I can't believe drugs are the only ultimate solution.
Listening to what you and everyone else has to say, educating myself, and trying to stay positive- That is what I am going to do for myself right now.
Thanks for caring.

Let me know what is going on with you.
Take care!