I would like to share with you my point of view on your problems. First of all, we all know when we get our stiffness, pain, swollen joints back - it means we got either a bump on a road (flair) or our treatments reached a plateau. I was changed from one drug to another as soon as my RA Dr sees the stiffness and swollen joints/soft tissue is back. I don't even have to tell her about my pains, she just tells me it simply not working and no reason to risk it.
Honestly, I don't do well with doctors who don't listen or don't care. I look for someone else. I travel for almost 2 hours to see my doctors because of my poor previous experiences. It took me a long time to finally find a team of doctors I am happy with. If you not happy the way your Dr communicates with you, time to change and go to someone else who will listen to you. This is simple advice and only this works. You can't make them care or listen if they don't know how or never done it. Just time for you to think and move on.
I know it's bad enough for people to deal with their health issues, no need to deal with cold doctors.
Just my 2 cents.