neicee_s

Hi all,

I may be putting the cart before the horse but I like to be prepared. Our middle son (we have 3 boys) is 9 and we feel very sure that he will be diagnosed with Asperger. He is to go back for more testing in Oct. with a Neuropsychologist. On the first visit the doctor mentioned it could be Asperger but of course could not make an official diagnosis yet. After what we have read, we as parents are 99.9 % sure.

Sooooo, assuming we get a diagnosis in the next few months, how do you go about explaining it to the child? He already has anxiety about so many things and I don't want to give him a complex or have him go into depression. I think one thing that could be good or bad, is how when he is introduced to something (a subject) that he is unfamiliar with he will ask a million questions. But then he also obsesses on that subject for hours or days. I noticed there are a good many members that post who themselves have this and I would love to hear your opinion on how to tell him.

Just a little history on him, he is super intelligent, makes straight A's in school. He has difficulty with being in situations where there are alot of noises, especially if there are alot of people talking or doing different things at one time. He likes things calm and relaxed and prefers one on one conversation because when he speaks, it takes him a while to say what he has to say because it has to be precise and he is very detailed in what he has to say. When we're all at the dinner table and everyone is talking and interjecting things he gets frustrated because he can't do that, he has to go into a long dissertation on everything. When he starts thinking of something he goes on forever about it and sometimes I feel bad because I have to tell him I just can't discuss this anymore, I have answered all of his questions and he goes on and on. The doctor said that was because of the frontal lobe something or other that he can't shut things down or off. He prefers to be by himself or with adults, kids don't understand him so they usually pick on him or he gets frustrated with them. He's a very picky eater and he'll say things like, "I don't want to eat anything that swims in the ocean, or anything that flys." He likes junk food mostly. He used to throw up at about every meal when we'd try to make him eat what we were having. I finally gave up and just let him do without if he says he doesn't want to try it. When he gets excited about something he'll jump up and down and shake his hands like he's wringing water off of them and he squeels like a little girl. When he's told no about something or that we can't do what he's wanting right that minute, like go to the store to get something, he gets very frustrated and will follow me around saying "why can't we go now" and no answer I give him is good enough. He takes everything literally. But over all, he's a great kid, never causes trouble in school and obeys rules, seems to be a rulekeeper and wants others to abide by the rules. There's so many other little "peculiarities" that we now understand better after reading about Aspergers. Now I can relate to him in an entirely different manner and we all get along better knowing that there's a reason behind the things he does. One more thing, he picks at the tips of his fingers to the point of getting them all infected.

So anyway, sorry to be so long but thank you for reading and any input will be greatly appreciated.

Sincerely,

Neicee S