It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Asperger's Syndrome Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 04-21-2008, 05:12 AM   #1
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: perthshire
Posts: 4
kat1979 HB User
Eye Contact - Aspergers

My 4 1/2 year old son has Aspergers and makes very little eye contact. Should I accept that this is part of Aspergers or try to encourage him to make eye contact? I have tryed games ( suggested by speech therapist )like holding objects near my face or putting something silly on my head which works at the time but doesnt make any difference the rest of the time. Your thoughts would be most welcome.

 
Old 04-21-2008, 07:05 AM   #2
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
GatsbyLuvr1920's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 1,871
GatsbyLuvr1920 HB UserGatsbyLuvr1920 HB UserGatsbyLuvr1920 HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

I have Asperger's, but few people think that I have poor eye contact. This is because I look at people's mouths, so they assume that I'm looking at their eyes. This is a trick I learned over the years- you can still sort of see the person's eyes, but it's not nearly as intense as looking directly into the eyes. (I still have poor eye contact, meaning that I look around the room and not at the person, with somebody I don't know well.) Maybe you could try this with your son. If he doesn't like looking at faces at all, you could maybe try the trick with him again when he's older and understands more of the social implications of eye contact. Good luck!
-GatsbyLuvr1920-
__________________
"Not everything that steps out of line, and thus 'abnormal,' must necessarily be 'inferior.'"
-Hans Asperger

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 04-21-2008, 12:43 PM   #3
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: perthshire
Posts: 4
kat1979 HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

Thanks so much for taking the time to reply. Your advise makes perfect sense and is much appreciated.

 
Old 04-21-2008, 04:27 PM   #4
Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Texas
Posts: 361
golfhat HB Usergolfhat HB Usergolfhat HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

That is good advice. If a child is old enough to understand that not making eye contact bothers people this little trick could do wonders.

 
Old 04-22-2008, 08:42 AM   #5
Inactive
(female)
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In the beautiful country
Posts: 5
MaybeImIndigo HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

Hi Kat, Im not sure how that would help, trying to draw focus to your eyes I guess is the goal his speech pathologists wants. I would try to use objects of interests, if you already havents, only use objects of interests. My mother and my son never made good eye contact, they seem to wonder all over as looking into someones eyes for some people can be quite intimidating and push the ability to not focus. Try to make a story line or talk to him about subjects of his interest and use your eyes for expression. Try to grab his gaze with your eyes and keep talking about the interests. Make it friendly and easy at first because you have to start small, you might be able to grab him a few seconds, but thats progress. He will better understand the concepts of it being rude or uncuthe by not making eye contact as he gets older, right now, try to focus on the concept, by looking into your eyes as you tell a SHORT story of his favorite interests, he will get the concept of looking into your eyes and mouth for his answers. He is still quite young and Im not sure how his auditory and speech is, but try to not make it any more complicating than what his abilities are right now. Remember you are building concepts and ideas brick by brick with these children, start small and use your good judgement about when it is time to go to the next level.

 
Old 04-24-2008, 10:21 AM   #6
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Leeds, England
Posts: 5
FairyBookWorm HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

As a sufferer of Aspergers i do find it difficult to look in peoples eyes, especially when I'm trying to think or express any emotions. My advice is don't push your son. He will look in your eyes when he's ready but this may take a while. You ahve to understand that he's not avoiding your eyes because he doesnt love you or because he's not listening to what you're saying but simply because he finds it hard. As he grows up, depending on the severity of his condition he will eitehr learn similar tricks already expressed to make life easier (i find myself focusing on the most prominent feature of the face that is'nt the eyes - except for one of my friends who has a weird spot on her eye and i tend to look at that) or he will be able to make eye contact with a few people, although there is a possibility he will be one of the many autistic people unable to make eye contact. The important thing to remember is that this is no reflection on you and that whatever progress he is going to make he will make at his own pace, even if you do try to 'trick' him into looking at your face.

 
Old 05-08-2008, 06:13 AM   #7
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Brooklyn New York USA
Posts: 742
Liamsmom HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

I was under the impression that Asperger's can't be diagnosed until the child is at least 7 yrs old. Right or wrong????

 
Old 05-08-2008, 10:53 AM   #8
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 537
datgrlstef HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

Supposedly the onset of Aspergers is later.. I think the lack of speech delays keeps a parent from being tipped off, perhaps? You might just assume a child has odd behaviors, but not necessarily think it's at all related to the Autism Spectrum.

I'm 33, and have never been diagnosed with any kind of disorder (such as Aspergers). However, I tend to look at people's mouths when they're speaking, as well. I can't help myself. I do try harder to give eye contact, though. Probably more so since taking my son to speech therapy. Eye contact is very important, and as she said- how do you expect people to know you're talking to them, if you're not looking at them? So I make an effort to do it. I also make sure my son does it, if only for a couple seconds.

 
Old 05-08-2008, 12:47 PM   #9
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
GatsbyLuvr1920's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 1,871
GatsbyLuvr1920 HB UserGatsbyLuvr1920 HB UserGatsbyLuvr1920 HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

The age at which AS can be diagnosed is often debated; datgrlstef is right about how it is diagnosed later than the other ASDs. Often, it is said that symptoms of Asperger's won't arise until after age three, but some professionals won't diagnose it until the school years, once the child has entered the social realm of school. However, I don't believe that symptoms aren't apparent until after age three in all children with AS. For example, I had "special interests" before the age of two. I was obsessed with glasses as an infant, and several childhood obsessions of mine began around 18 months. I also toe-walked from the minute I could walk (and I still toe-walk). Sensory issues also have always been with me. My family has home videos of me complaining about bright lights when I was about 18 months, and I always have had severe tactile sensory issues about the way clothes feel. I also was hyperlexic as a child, and I first started to demonstrate a remarkable rote memory as a toddler, memorizing dialogue of TV shows and movies that were "special interests," as well as commercials. The social problems usually aren't apparent until the preschool years or later, and that's why diagnoses usually are put off, since AS is supposed to be primarily a problem with social interaction. My social deficits are mild ones, so that's why I didn't get diagnosed until I was an adult, but my "special interests" and sensory issues are what define my AS, and those have always been with me. If I grew up today, I would very likely have been diagnosed when I entered preschool, because it was extremely obvious, even though the social problems were more subtle. So, depending on which AS criteria one looks at, the symptoms can be present before age 3.
-GatsbyLuvr1920-
__________________
"Not everything that steps out of line, and thus 'abnormal,' must necessarily be 'inferior.'"
-Hans Asperger

Last edited by GatsbyLuvr1920; 05-08-2008 at 12:49 PM.

 
Old 05-08-2008, 04:18 PM   #10
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 5
Cassandra72 HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

It is probably easier to diagnose Aspergers, in "hindsite". The trouble with diagnosing young children is that the behaviors are so subtle, they may be due to other factors. That is why clinicians usually wait until age 7 to see how the child matures and how their behaviors evolve. And just like autism is a spectrum, so is Asperger's, with many "normal" people living with some traits of Aspergers and it never bothering them. People are all different and we don't necessary need a diagnosis for being different.

 
Old 05-13-2008, 05:03 PM   #11
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: fort wayne,IN USA
Posts: 1
cheryl72 HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

Quote:
Originally Posted by Liamsmom View Post
I was under the impression that Asperger's can't be diagnosed until the child is at least 7 yrs old. Right or wrong????
that is wrong. my child was diagnosed with aspergers at the age of two.

 
Old 05-15-2008, 02:51 AM   #12
Newbie
(male)
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: bolton england
Posts: 5
snotty1 HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

Hi everyone. Im new here so please bear with me. I am stepdad to Sophie who was born with CP and brain damage. She is now 7 and is a wonderful kid, normally very happy just being happy and by making everyone around her smile. However she has recently began to turn instantly moody and will kick-off big style if she doesnt get her own way. This can result in screaming fits and doing the dying fly as we call it (lieing on her back kicking up at anyone who goes near her). This can be VERY distressing for all concerned and I was wondering if anyone has any advice on coping with this type of bad behaviour. Normally I use distraction techniques to coax her along but even I think she is getting a bit wise to me! Thanks for any advice with this. Bern.

 
Old 05-15-2008, 01:32 PM   #13
Member
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 98
DannysMum HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

Hi Snotty1! I think you are posting on the wrong message board!
We are currently discussing eye contact in people with asperger syndrome, is there a board specialising in CP? People there are much more likely to be able to help.
FYO - when an ASD child is kicking off we don't call it bad behaviour usually, as they are not being 'bad', frustrated probably, not bad. LOL

Last edited by DannysMum; 05-15-2008 at 01:35 PM.

 
Old 05-15-2008, 02:28 PM   #14
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 537
datgrlstef HB User
Re: Eye Contact - Aspergers

Quote:
Originally Posted by DannysMum View Post
Hi Snotty1! I think you are posting on the wrong message board!
We are currently discussing eye contact in people with asperger syndrome, is there a board specialising in CP? People there are much more likely to be able to help.
FYO - when an ASD child is kicking off we don't call it bad behaviour usually, as they are not being 'bad', frustrated probably, not bad. LOL
Children on the spectrum might not be able to help all behaviors, but many of them do act out on purpose just like any other child.

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Aspergers- Are you parents out there?? c21cg Asperger's Syndrome 16 12-20-2011 09:00 AM
Adult Aspergers - how to get an assessment deber Asperger's Syndrome 10 11-22-2010 01:37 PM
Risk to eye from weekly disposable contact lenses? Chalkman Eye & Vision 3 04-23-2010 08:24 AM
What is the Difference between Autism and Aspergers tangyshoo Asperger's Syndrome 19 10-08-2007 07:45 AM
Could my child have Aspergers? tylersmom29 Asperger's Syndrome 21 05-05-2007 03:15 PM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



mscat40 (7), writeleft (3), Brocallie (2), dkw46 (2), ninamarc (2), rosequartz (1), ness67 (1), emeraldsea (1), michlei (1), Foreverseeking (1)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1180), MSJayhawk (1007), Apollo123 (906), Titchou (851), janewhite1 (823), Gabriel (759), ladybud (755), midwest1 (669), sammy64 (668), BlueSkies14 (607)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:02 PM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!