Re: aspergers and relationship advice
It does sound like he likes you. We don't get excited about coffee break with people we don't like! He may not recognize flirting unless it is obvious, but as long as he enjoys your company, he'll hang out with you.
Being a female, it's difficult for me to ask someone to do things with me; I don't know if the guys have the same difficulty or not. But if someone else suggests an activity to me, I would certainly take them up on it if I wanted to be with them.
Yes, the set routines are typical of Aspergers. We can learn to be less rigid, but it takes time, and we need to see that the world doesn't come to an end! Or that there is a better, simpler way. Some of our rigid behaviors have underlying reasons behind them, so you might want to ask him some questions. Like, my keys ALWAYS go on the same place on my counter. Why? Because if they aren't there, I have absolutely no idea where they might be, and will search the house from top to bottom, being frantic and upset the entire time until the keys turn up. Most of my "rigid behaviors" stemmed from a bad situation I got myself in, and then made myself a "rule" that I would ALWAYS do it like this so I didn't have to go through that emotional turmoil / meltdown again. Sometimes it's for easiness. For example, the glasses go in the cabinet by the refrigerator. Why? Because I get drinks out numerous times each day, and it's more convenient. I ALWAYS use unscented or low scent shampoo. Why? Scents make my allergies flare up. So ask him - why does he do things a certain way. If someone shows me a better, easier way, I can quickly change. If it's no better for me, just "different", I can be as obstinate as a mule.
The non-stop talking may need professional help. Sometimes I have this problem, but not often, however, I know two guys with Aspergers who literally won't stop talking, even after you tell them to be quiet so you can talk. They will talk with no pauses for 20-30 minutes straight. If I ever get a word in edgewise, they will almost immediately talk right over me. Don't know what the solution is to this, I've tried a timer (which didn't work), and have been tempted to try duct tape! I have seen good counseling help with this. My personal solution has been to avoid these guys, because they aren't having a conversation, they are engaging in a monologue, and really don't care what other people have to say.
Good luck with this guy! We can be fun, entertaining people in the right environment, and we're very loyal.