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Old 03-07-2009, 10:37 PM   #1
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Smile Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

My 4 yr old is downright defiant against me! He is like super nanny's biggest challenge! Mean as ever one minute and just a sweetheart the next! He is very smart! 2 smart 4 his age! He does have a problem w/ change in routine, potty training, and ocd moments. He is currently receiving therapy for his potty training, but his therapist, (not the phychiatrist), is saying she doesn't think he has it. But she doesn't see the horrible fits of rage @ the house. Him saying i don;t love you anymore and calling you a dummy XXX and screaming to the top of his lungs anywhere i take him, most of all in the car! He throws his shoes at me when im driving. I love him with all my heart, but is this just normal kid behavior or something more serious? He is the smartest kid n his class practically, just the behavior is out of control.

 
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Old 03-08-2009, 11:48 PM   #2
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Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

hi - i would rec'd taking you son to a child psychologist for a thorough eval and they'll include intervews from you and teachers ,etc. to help decide what interventions would be good.

let us know what happens.

 
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Old 03-10-2009, 12:42 PM   #3
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Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

coincidentally, a friend of mine just told me today that her six year old has recently been diagnosed with aspergers. funny enough for about the past four years the entire neighborhood new that there was something off about this child, yet she never did.
anyway, i did some research on this this morning as i always do when someone tells me something and this is what i learned: aspergers is a form of autism, these children often display signs of being unsocial, they have problems listening to others. In my experiece with this particular child, i can hear him screaming, yelling, throwing tantrums and i live across the street. does your son act this way only towards you? or also with his teaches? please know a lot of these kids are smart they just have behaviour problems,
and no social skills. if your son has been diagnosed then i'm assuming that he has done all sorts of psychological evaluations, and all sorts of tests? are you doubting the diagnosis? this child i know, never answers back when you speak to him and never looks you in the eyes, he does not take orders well form his teachers and does not interact at all with his peers. please get to the bottom of this, if your child needs help, please get him it. glad to hear you see there is a problem, that is the first step to getting the proper help for your child. the behaviour that your child is exhibiting right now is not normal, throwing shoes at you in the car as your driving, it can be deadly.
this type of behaviour is not in any way normal, or acceptable anywhere.
you need to get him psychiatrists and psycologist and pediatricians to evaluate him and his situation. does your child have a shadow at school?
please be patient, imagine waht he's going through.

Last edited by fufu; 03-10-2009 at 12:47 PM. Reason: forgot to addsomething

 
Old 03-12-2009, 07:54 PM   #4
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Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

Try another doctor. Try many doctors if you are unsure. My 4 year old has Autism, a friend has a teenager with Aspergers. Your sons behavior doesn't sound like either one to me, but then, I am not a doctor. You do need help but don't just accept one diagnosis if you are unsure about what they are saying. Have you explored your own disciplinary skills? There could be a more simple answer to your problem. Don't mean to offend.
Michelle.

 
Old 03-15-2009, 02:58 PM   #5
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Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

I would question the diagnoses too if it were my child. What are the reasons why he is not potty trained? A Aperger child would be advanced in these skills, not delayed.
Your child might be doing this for control reasons? or anger issues? What is going on in preschol? What is suppose to happen when a child is experiencing emotional problems is that the "whole child" needs to be looked at. Where the child is experiencing stress. If your sone is simply taking his anger out on you.. Why he is having these rage , temper tanturms, and how his parents are handeling them when they are occuring.
Psychatrists have to give diagnoses in order to treat patients. Keep that in mind. For such a young child, a developmental ped. or specialist is most qualified in diagnosing. Call your local Regional center. They will evaluate your son! . That is the best thing to do. Look in your phone book. Call them up, tell them , what you know, and what the psych doctor said. And that you need a more accurate diagnose. OR you can also turn to your local school district. Your son is close enough to being evaluated by your local school district, and they will do a full eval on him as well.

 
Old 05-07-2009, 12:43 PM   #6
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Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

No one here can tell you, based on the information you have provided, if your son really has Asperger's. I can tell you that while I didn't have potty training problems as a child, when I got older I did get to where I would just hold it in and never go do #2, because I didn't like the way it felt, looked, or smelled. It was all just gross, it was multiple sensory issues all rolled into one.

I didn't know I had Asperger's until just last year, but it sure made a hell of a lot of sense once I discovered it. You definitely need to see someone for another opinion if you don't feel right about the diagnosis, but I want to stress to you the importance in this matter of only dealing with psychologists who are experienced with the autism spectrum. Psychologists who do not often see children or adults with Asperger's are less likely to see it, as it does manifest itself differently in everyone. Your kid's bathroom issue could be an entirely unrelated issue and he could still have Asperger's.

To say that all kids with Asperger's potty train well and early is far too broad of a statement, just like saying all kids with Asperger's are good spellers or good at math. I potty trained well but had problems later in my childhood, I sucked at math, but I was an amazing speller.

 
Old 06-10-2009, 07:47 AM   #7
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Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

Hi there, my nine year old son has just been diagnosed with autism, he too was very late toilet training, and is also very smart, however when hes cross or things upset him he can be both verbally and physically abusive, i have strict rules on what i will and wont stand for and allthough when he has something taken off him because of actions he doesnt like it or agree, but after taking the same thing off him for the same action he is slowly starting to realise he doesnt like it,dont get me wrong it doesnt work over night , but by bieng consistant i think you can slowly change behaviours hope this helps

 
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Old 06-11-2009, 07:16 AM   #8
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Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

I would prefer an Asperger child to belong to a smaller class at school. A big class is too much noice and people etc.

My sons went to each different small class during first 4-5 years until they were 10-12 years old. They needed that calm period to be able to concentrate and communicate and enjoy school.

Now at 17 they like to go to ordinary classes with 20-30 pupils in each subject...

Last edited by elbryn; 06-12-2009 at 08:47 AM.

 
Old 06-11-2009, 07:20 AM   #9
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Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

Our sons were first diagnosed with autism at the age of 2. But since a few years son No 2 is diagnosed with Asperger which is a special kind of autism.

Twin No 1 does not have any diagnosis any more. He was declared to be free of his autism a year ago when he was going to take the driving-licence...

Last edited by elbryn; 06-12-2009 at 08:49 AM.

 
Old 06-11-2009, 11:53 AM   #10
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Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

Dear Jen,
It certainly sounds as though you have your hands full & need help!

Whatever studies are done on your son to evaluate his intelligence & behavorial issues - you may also want to consider having allergy & food sensitivity testing done too. Sometimes triggers from a variety of things can cause extreme behaviors such as you are describing. This can include vaccination reactions, & being overloaded with various toxins, even reactions to food additives (MSG, GMOs, HFCS, etc), artificial colorings, & more.

Our world has a great deal more challenges than when we were growing up & the whole combination seems to be affecting an entire generation of kids. If you ask teachers about this who have been teaching for anywhere from 15 to 30 years about these concerns they will tell you the same thing, and that kids have changed a great deal from the way they used to be!

 
Old 06-13-2009, 01:25 PM   #11
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Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

Thank you all who have gave me good opinions & advice that I can use. I actually have been very persistant w/the therapist & pychiatrist that now it looks like he is exhibiting signs of bipolar. He now is 5 and FINALLY potty trained fully. I don't believe someone should drug their child but it was a last resort that we gave into. His Dr put him on Depakote as a mood stabilizer & to our suprise, it's like we have our sweet son back. Yes, he does still have a few fits, but they aren't as bad & they last a couple of minutes. He still talks back but he gets diciplined. He just recently started tearing his books up so we put them in a box & took them out of his room. Once he reliezes that he is not in control, things will be the way I want. I may not be the best parent, but it is a learning experience with your 1st child & boy have i learned. What I mean I guess is that no parent is perfect but I do consider myself a good parent. All of my boys needs are provided & I hug them and tell them I love them all the time. I give them praise & I dicipline & try to play & interact with them more. I am a parent in the making! Now I will know how to be a better mom to my 2 yr old son!

 
Old 06-13-2009, 11:55 PM   #12
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Mira11 HB User
Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

jen - i can tell you are a great parent. and that is great that depakote is helping.

 
Old 07-02-2009, 11:23 AM   #13
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Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

My son was diagnosed with AS at 4yo. He started pre-K at 4 wearing diapers. Our school system did not allow this, but the teacher was kind when I told her, she understood. He did not become fully potty trained to poop on the toilet till he was about 6. Frustrating! grrr......

 
Old 08-04-2009, 03:21 PM   #14
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Re: Son diagnosed w/Aspergers! Im not sure though!

There are no good or bad parents, just parents who love their children. I am 54 and believe I have asperger and I know from what I have read that I can often be hard to take. but I of course don't realize this unless someone points this out to me. I often say things in social situations that I can tell by the reactions of the others was not proper in that situation. I along with others with aspergers don't mean to be rude or unruly we just have a hard time knowing how to behave in social situations or life in general. I know it takes a special kind of person to handle us, and I praise them for it. My husband is a saint but I know he wishes he could better understand me. He wants to fix me, but I am not broke like a china cup, or toy. I can't be fixed I just have to continue to live among the neuro-typical people and try to fit in as best I can. I visit u-tube and hear some people with aspergers say they are fine with it and don't want it taken away but I say I have been this way all my life and for one day I would like to be neuro-typical to see the difference. Maybe It would be no better but I would like to know, cause I often hate my life.

 
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