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Old 03-27-2010, 11:48 PM   #16
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Re: Adult Aspergers

Quote:
Originally Posted by UhohKris View Post
I'm feeling the same way! Though I'm a bit younger...I feel like I have autism and didn't know it my whole life...So I guess I don't have an answer but you're surely not alone I always felt like I thought and acted backwards my whole life.
Uhohkris,

Although I cannot give medical diagnosis, because I could get kicked off the message board for this. HOWEVER, I can say this for sure. Based on the way I grew up, based on the confusion and fear that you may have when you get near anyone that you believe will want to carry on a general conversation, and the other signs that I have heard that you have experienced throughout your life, I can say that it is ABSOLUTELY CONSISTENT TO THE "T" AS ASPERGER'S SYNDROME!!! In fact, I would bet my left index finger on it (I'm a righty, just in case I'm somehow wrong). When you have studied it within yourself like I have with myself since I was six, and through pharmaceuticals, I have achieved normality with no symptoms of either Bi-Polar or any introversion or inappropriateness from the Asperger's, I'm able to look back and see how difficult my social life was. Basically, I didn't have one, and like you, we weren't born capable of having one. Your psychologist will blow this off, and I'm not trying to shove pills down your throat to advocate that pharmaceuticals are the only way to go, but the one irrefutable truth that I can verify with documented proof, and tons of evidence simply from 16 years of studying and experimenting with meds with one of the greatest psychiatrist that ever lived in my book, that what you or your psychologist might think is psychological in Asperger's, is in fact neurological. That, I can prove; and I'm waiting for someone on here to challenge me on it, but with no luck. Nonetheless, I also don't want you to start on medications when it's something that you're not comfortable with. Lot's of those diagnosed with Aspergers have found that much of their relief comes from high amounts of multivitamins and minerals, but I suggest you go to a health food store instead of a grocery store, because some aspy's have a hard time digesting the hard coating that some of the more "commercial" vitamins they sell at the stores; whereas at the health food stores, they have gel caps, with liquid vitamins inside, so it digests very easily. Note that a lot of aspy's have gastrointestinal issues, and have problems digesting certain foods, vitamins with hardshells, and other types of things that don't bother others. I want you to know that I know exactly what you are feeling. Now that I am able to socialize, and all of my neurogical issues have been solved, I can carry on conversations with people now, and have made it my life ambition to help mostly adolescents (males dipically) to handle their Asperger's, especially if nothing else is working, then medications may be the only alternative. This is my specialty, and I have studied what does and doesn't work with Aspy's as far as medication goes for almost two decades now. Write back on the message board if you need any more possible ideas or suggestions, I'm free to help.

Quixote23

 
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Old 03-28-2010, 12:08 AM   #17
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Re: Adult Aspergers

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trang123 View Post
Thanks for your comments. My doc is not completely convinced, he reckons more like a fear of socialising or a personality disorder. Maybe a thin line, who know's...all i know is it's not cool and I struggle like hell through life.
Thank you Trang123 for talking with your doctor about it. The one thing I have learned over almost two decades of intensely studying myself, and my transformation through medications into a normal person, who can talk and socialize and chit chat, which I never thought I could do, is this: Doctor's don't know %$%^&* about Asperger's and how it relates to autism, what goes on in our heads, the confusion we experience when we can see ahead of time that we might end up in a social situation that makes us want to excuse ourselves and run as far away as possible as fast as we can; subconscously, we know ahead of time that we are not capable, physically in our brain to socialize, and we feel a tremendous amount of pressure when we feel we are going to have to sit down and talk to someone we hardly know and chit-chat, which we aren't capable of doing. I lived in the same world that you lived in for 21 years, until I started taking Ritalin, and all of these neurons that were so inactive that controlled speech, eye contact, looking at someone and connecting directly with them( sort of like a strong connection) ,became active and began to work. That began a 16 and a half year obsession for me to solve the biggest puzzle and take on the biggest challenge that I had ever taken on before. To make myself normal, to where not only where I'm acting normally, but I feel that I also feel normal inside.

I don't mean to take the attention off of you and your situation. I just want you to realize that the only way you are going to get out of this hell is to become your own doctor of your own body. You need to change the beliefs that you have that Doctor's know nearly most everything, when in this case concerning Asperger's, they really don't have a clue. One of the reasons (which I've heard before myself) why your doctor said he wasn't completely convinced you had asperger's said right there that he doesn't know anything about it really. If he did, he would be able to pick up on it in less than five minutes. Check back if you have any questions!

Quixote23

 
Old 03-28-2010, 02:05 AM   #18
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Re: Adult Aspergers

May I just correct you quickly...we don't think backwards honey :-) we just think different to others. Backwards make us sound stupid, we are not stupid. I have a degree in music, we are achievers, just not as comfortable being " human" around others. We are just over sensitive, and our shyness I think makes people think we're backward, because we would rather keep the peace than confront them and they walk over us, yet inside we know and say to ourselves, Hey you moron, stop being such an idiot, yet we keep quiet.... well I do :-)

 
Old 03-28-2010, 01:44 PM   #19
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UhohKris HB User
Re: Adult Aspergers

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trang123 View Post
May I just correct you quickly...we don't think backwards honey :-) we just think different to others. Backwards make us sound stupid, we are not stupid. I have a degree in music, we are achievers, just not as comfortable being " human" around others. We are just over sensitive, and our shyness I think makes people think we're backward, because we would rather keep the peace than confront them and they walk over us, yet inside we know and say to ourselves, Hey you moron, stop being such an idiot, yet we keep quiet.... well I do :-)

Actuuualllyyy...I'm more on that spectrum where I say random absurd things that I don't realize is absurd because I can't really tell by looking at people. It's ...a curse haha

and it's not terrets (sp) it's more like....saying things im thinking that i shouldnt of said

Last edited by UhohKris; 03-28-2010 at 01:46 PM.

 
Old 03-28-2010, 01:51 PM   #20
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UhohKris HB User
Re: Adult Aspergers

Quote:
Originally Posted by Quixote23 View Post
Uhohkris,

Although I cannot give medical diagnosis, because I could get kicked off the message board for this. HOWEVER, I can say this for sure. Based on the way I grew up, based on the confusion and fear that you may have when you get near anyone that you believe will want to carry on a general conversation, and the other signs that I have heard that you have experienced throughout your life, I can say that it is ABSOLUTELY CONSISTENT TO THE "T" AS ASPERGER'S SYNDROME!!! In fact, I would bet my left index finger on it (I'm a righty, just in case I'm somehow wrong). When you have studied it within yourself like I have with myself since I was six, and through pharmaceuticals, I have achieved normality with no symptoms of either Bi-Polar or any introversion or inappropriateness from the Asperger's, I'm able to look back and see how difficult my social life was. Basically, I didn't have one, and like you, we weren't born capable of having one. Your psychologist will blow this off, and I'm not trying to shove pills down your throat to advocate that pharmaceuticals are the only way to go, but the one irrefutable truth that I can verify with documented proof, and tons of evidence simply from 16 years of studying and experimenting with meds with one of the greatest psychiatrist that ever lived in my book, that what you or your psychologist might think is psychological in Asperger's, is in fact neurological. That, I can prove; and I'm waiting for someone on here to challenge me on it, but with no luck. Nonetheless, I also don't want you to start on medications when it's something that you're not comfortable with. Lot's of those diagnosed with Aspergers have found that much of their relief comes from high amounts of multivitamins and minerals, but I suggest you go to a health food store instead of a grocery store, because some aspy's have a hard time digesting the hard coating that some of the more "commercial" vitamins they sell at the stores; whereas at the health food stores, they have gel caps, with liquid vitamins inside, so it digests very easily. Note that a lot of aspy's have gastrointestinal issues, and have problems digesting certain foods, vitamins with hardshells, and other types of things that don't bother others. I want you to know that I know exactly what you are feeling. Now that I am able to socialize, and all of my neurogical issues have been solved, I can carry on conversations with people now, and have made it my life ambition to help mostly adolescents (males dipically) to handle their Asperger's, especially if nothing else is working, then medications may be the only alternative. This is my specialty, and I have studied what does and doesn't work with Aspy's as far as medication goes for almost two decades now. Write back on the message board if you need any more possible ideas or suggestions, I'm free to help.

Quixote23
I honestly don't know what all of this medication stuff is about...I was diagnosed with everything from depression down to bi polar early in my life. I got off the medication by choice. I'm not in pain or anything, I don't understand why I would need medication for this right now. I just feel depressed of people judging me because they don't know, believe it or not the world CAN be like middle school. What does the medication help? To be more out going?

 
Old 03-31-2010, 08:11 PM   #21
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Quixote23 HB User
Re: Adult Aspergers

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trang123 View Post
May I just correct you quickly...we don't think backwards honey :-) we just think different to others. Backwards make us sound stupid, we are not stupid. I have a degree in music, we are achievers, just not as comfortable being " human" around others. We are just over sensitive, and our shyness I think makes people think we're backward, because we would rather keep the peace than confront them and they walk over us, yet inside we know and say to ourselves, Hey you moron, stop being such an idiot, yet we keep quiet.... well I do :-)
You are absolutely right! I'm sorry for my wording, and my possible subconscious and instant outlook, which I'm not sure where it came from. I have to self-meditate over this. Because I do feel that we are not backwards. That upsets me off to hear some neurotypical say that! Now I said the very same thing, and didn't even realize it. Thank you for noticing! I will put an immediate stop to this type of language that spirts out of me!

Quixote23

 
Old 03-31-2010, 08:21 PM   #22
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Quixote23 HB User
Re: Adult Aspergers

Quote:
Originally Posted by UhohKris View Post
I honestly don't know what all of this medication stuff is about...I was diagnosed with everything from depression down to bi polar early in my life. I got off the medication by choice. I'm not in pain or anything, I don't understand why I would need medication for this right now. I just feel depressed of people judging me because they don't know, believe it or not the world CAN be like middle school. What does the medication help? To be more out going?
It helped me communicate to the point that I could look into a woman's eyes, make a joke, make her laugh, and make a connection with her, and we could laugh together and feel a bond for several moments.

It helped me feel "normal" inside; which is something you would feel when you find the right medications for your symptoms. Like my old psychiatrist used to say,"There is no such thing as normal; however, when it comes to medicating your symptoms of Asperger's and Bi-Polar Disorder, you always LOOK for NORMAL. And you WILL know how it feels when you find it!

It helped me to communicate on the same level as "neurotypicals". Now, I'm so comfortable around my fellow aspy's, and can talk with them the same as I can with family that I haven't seen but once a year every Christmas when we're excited to see each other and we're catching up. AND, I'm also completely on the same social wavelength as the neurotypicals, and have found a whole new social world, which has given me friends who will back me up and help me out in any situation I may need help in.

It helped me in me having no sense of humor, to being completely joking around with everyone, which before, I hated anything related to a joke. I hated to hear people laughing.

Basically, medications gave me a personality!!!!!!

Quixote23

 
Old 04-02-2010, 05:30 AM   #23
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UhohKris HB User
Re: Adult Aspergers

Quote:
Originally Posted by Quixote23 View Post
You are absolutely right! I'm sorry for my wording, and my possible subconscious and instant outlook, which I'm not sure where it came from. I have to self-meditate over this. Because I do feel that we are not backwards. That upsets me off to hear some neurotypical say that! Now I said the very same thing, and didn't even realize it. Thank you for noticing! I will put an immediate stop to this type of language that spirts out of me!

Quixote23
I don't get why saying "thinking backwards" is bad...

I always said it as a good thing actually, I've always been proud of being different, even though that means lacking of a social life.

I guess whenever I say it I mean it in an artistic way...like looking at things backwards is coming to the same conclusion as everyone else but from different clues.

 
Old 04-03-2010, 12:01 AM   #24
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Re: Adult Aspergers

I hear what you're saying :-) it's just the word backwards had a negative stigma attached to it, so lets call ourselves independent thinkers doing things from a slightly different angle to others, while achieving same results. I agree with you, I know I am different in social scenes and communication is hard, but my question now is... are we " backward " or are they???? lolol

 
Old 04-03-2010, 05:43 AM   #25
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UhohKris HB User
Re: Adult Aspergers

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trang123 View Post
I hear what you're saying :-) it's just the word backwards had a negative stigma attached to it, so lets call ourselves independent thinkers doing things from a slightly different angle to others, while achieving same results. I agree with you, I know I am different in social scenes and communication is hard, but my question now is... are we " backward " or are they???? lolol
Haha nice one!

 
Old 04-29-2010, 10:16 AM   #26
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Smile Re: Adult Aspergers

Hi,
I am a 25 year old female who was diagnosed at 2 with autism...I was really severe but with much schooling and such, but today hardly anyone would be able to tell...in fact, I told a few counselors and they didn't think I had autism, aspergers, if anything. Needless to say, it is rather difficult and complex to be able to diagnose someone so it could be possible (in my opinion)...Interestingly enough, I also have ADHD,not to uncommon for autistic people to have as a dual diagnosis, and I didn't know about this until I was 22 years old. Lol, as I thought it was normal to loose focus after 5 minutes of reading. So anything is possible...We seem very much alike though as far as personality traits go...I am not into small talk at all, give me a heavy topic like philosophy, integrity, science, making connections, and research questions (what would happen if) type of topics...otherwise, it's just so boring...no wonder why I'd rather be in my own world. :P Hypersensitive, give me number over words anyday (especially since I do far better communicating if I show instead of say), and eccentric or kooky is what I've always used to describe myself....hence the reason why it seems as if I'd be better off talking to a brick wall instead of another human and would rather spend time alone....otherwise it just gets to be too overwhelming. I also need time alone to calm down, especially after a rough incident. It gets to be too much, or too chaotic, where you cannot function or focus. Sound kinda familiar? Here's a few other traits that might help you...as far as hypersensitivity, I am picky on clothes. Some autistic people can only wear a certain brand or type of pants for example. As far as I go, I hate wearing tight long sleeve shirts or pants because I feel too constricted and no way in hell do I want to wear tights or high heels. Another trait that is not too uncommon, a lot of females with aspies tend to be tomboys...I wear boxers everyday...need I say more. :P And another common trait, taking things literally...and to this day I still do sometimes...although I think I mastered sarcasm with some of the oozing remarks I've made in the past. *devilish grin* Not to mention, it seems very common for aspies to highly value integrity, trying to be good people...and it's difficult because we can be VERY understanding of people and treat them with respect since we know what it's like to be treated poorly, but what is worse is that people don't seem to see this...instead they think we need to improve on commitment or spend more time with them...I say quality over quantity. What time I do spend with a person, I am very passionate about trying to make them feel good (whether this is listening to them or doing something kind, etc) but this takes a LOT of effort to do so we also need time to rest up and rejuvenate so we can continue to have the strength and focus on doing our best to treat people with integrity... Also, it seems common for us to be able to relate better to animals than to humans...and no way in hells bells would I or did I ever want to get married either...yucka. I tried the dating thing like you but now I tell people that I am married to art and music is my mistress...or whatever. Point is, it seems as if, I am too happier and better stimulated by diving into knowledge and creativity rather than "social activities". I know this doesn't answer all of your questions, but I hope this helps. Not to mention, you seem like a pretty cool person, aspies or not.

 
Old 05-03-2010, 08:25 AM   #27
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Re: Adult Aspergers

I'm a 23 year old guy and I was diagnosed during childhood. School was tough and I never really had a lot of friends and usually I was pretty unpopular. Nobody ever taught me the rules of social interaction but by my late teens I managed to learn by rote much of what came naturally to others. I've also been repeatedly diagnosed with ADD and depression which I've been battling for the past 8 to 10 years (I can't really even remember anymore).

You wouldn't know I had it if you talked to me and I'm quite an amiable person but because of past humiliation it's drilled into my brain to associate being social with emotional pain and I've developed a sort of mental block in that area of my life. And it's really frustrating because I'm 23 and I've yet to have a girlfriend. Even though I think I'm not unattractive and I have a lot to offer I just cant seem to bring myself to take the bull by the horns and talk to women. I really feel like I need someone to show me the ropes with everything in my life and of course that never happens. How does a guy with AS deal with that? I sometimes feel like the condition totally screws guys over in that respect.

Anyways I'm not that lonely, strangely. I've descended into a sort of mental limbo for maybe the last 5 years where I feel neither highs nor lows. I had an episode of severe depression in high school and after that I was never able to truly experience emotion. I'm working with my doctor but the drugs don't work and I'm getting frustrated. My life is going nowhere and I don't seem to care. I've lost passion for pretty much everything I cared about and I'm just bored with life.

Sorry, just needed to vent.

 
Old 06-26-2010, 02:32 PM   #28
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flickfire HB User
Re: Adult Aspergers

I'm sorry you that feel about your life the way
that you do. I have a lot of struggles myself, and
sometimes wonder if it's worth going on, but I still
do, because I think that the good things about life
outweigh the bad.

I think you're lucky that you're young, and hopefully
have many years left in your life. To every problem
there is a solution, and I hope you find yours.

Good luck to you!

 
Old 06-27-2010, 01:24 AM   #29
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Trang123 HB User
Re: Adult Aspergers

Hi fiveninefive,

I just want to say how reading your message touched me. I can relate to how you must be feeling. I also am replying basically to tell you that guys look at woman differently, they are more visual, looks grab their attention, I guess that's how nature designed guys, but from a womans point of view, we look for different things in guys. We look for someone who is caring, kind, and is genuine in their love...but they have a certain confidence about them. they can be the most nerdiest looking guy on the planet, but oozing that irresistable lovable way of making the person they with feel like she is the most important person in the world and you leave their company feeling good about yourself...and know that you have made them happy. I guess what I am trying to say here is this... there is no need to be nervous around woman, they human just like you,start off by smiling to various people when walking down the street, a simple thing like this will change things, how you perceive yourself and how others perceive you...just by a simple smile as starters. I also relaate to you giving up on things and with me I had a passion for life and now I have to struggle to find a reason to do things. I am doing a degree in Health Science now and my doctor put me on something called modivigil, hope spelling is right. Anyway this is to keep you awake during day, for my studies, but what I discovered was, this has helped me tremendously in my concentration which was a huge thing with me. It has given me passion again about doing things like studying. When we are depressed it affects our chemical balance in our brain, I know this, it happened to me many times. We try to rationally talk ourselves out of depression but can't. find a Dr who will listen to you and not just load you with anti depressents....you need your zing back in life, mine was studying....but I needed modivigil to help me same as ADD meds. Hope my rambling on here has helped in some way :-)

 
Old 05-07-2011, 07:53 PM   #30
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Re: Adult Aspergers

I also have asperger syndrome and I am a lifelong loner

 
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