out of home placement - Autism Spectrum Message Board

redshoes · 12-25-2005, 05:55 PM

Have any of you placed your children out of home. Our 13 year old son is becoming increasingly hard to manage. I sometimes wonder if a placement would be better so that he could have the structure he needs and that we are not able to always provide. we also have young children and he can not stand the noise level that comes with them. we can not afford a bigger house as many of you know that money is tight, I just don't know if i can bare not having him live at home but I worry that I am not doing what is best for him but what is best for me.

Kathy

muzicman66 · 12-26-2005, 07:25 PM

I have an 11 yr. old daughter who was placed about a year ago. The main reason was safety and better medicines, that could only be given if she was monitored.
The results are unbelievable. She has advanced more in the past year than all others combined. I set it up so I can see her at any time, including weekdays asd holidays. Most of the time. I only have to give a one hour notice. We both reside in NJ.

marissamm · 12-26-2005, 09:12 PM

hi redshoes, my son is 17 hfa, between the age of 11-15 was real hard, he was so violent towards me and everyone else in my family it was real hard taking care of him. if i had the option of placement i would of taken it in a heartbeat, but in tn. they didn't have accomodations. i even had dhs called on me, when they realized the situation i was in the backed off, they told me that they couldn't offer anything because he was too violent,he chased them out of the house with a 2x4. i called the police numerous times they wouldn't remove himbecause of his disability, he is 6 feet tall and weighs 250 lbs, one dangerous afternoon he came at me with a knife i had to protect my younger daughter and i had to hit him and knock him down, and he tried a couple of more times but at 16 i had to fight him back, i did and he realized that now i fight back he didn't like that, so he quit hitting me, i never became afraid of him but he was too big to restrain like i used to. i am a strong willed woman and i would be damned if i let my kid continue to beat me. now he is 17 he has been real good all year, every now and then he will draw a fist at me i will ask him "you wanna" he will drop that fist and apoligize immedietly, now our realationship is repaired he will be able to get his own apt when he turns 18.but i am glad he is not violent anymore, but good luck your doing the right thing.