I titled this post this way because I am wondering why I went to school so long. I have a Master's in English, and am beginning to think I might have done better in life if I had just been content to finish high school or just obtained a basic Bachelor's degree. That extra education didn't really do me much good and some of it might have even done harm. Most of the stuff I was taught and read in school went contrary to my basic philosophy of life. Looking back, I had very few joyous experiences in college. Between coping with roommates (with a few exceptions), the depressing things I read, and going through the psychological "system" again after four years of repreive in high school, I was miserable, in retrospect. I loved school and academics growing up, and still love reading and seeking knowledge of all kinds, but I'm sick of schooling. If I had to do it again, I'd avail myself of the Internet.
Sometimes I think those years would have been better spent working and catching up on things I never did growing up, like learning to drive and gaining other important skills. Hopefully, it isn't too late but, at almost 42, I find myself getting less and less patient with other drivers on the road and less desirous to risk life and limb from the actions of some of the really irresponsible drivers on the road in my town.
Was all that time wasted? Did all that education help or hurt me? I hear people ask why I am doing certain things if I have all that education. I answer, truthfully, that I feel I am in the right place for me right now. I have a job I love and one which is well tailored to my specific interests and abilities. Theoretically, no education is really wasted, but I wonder, is it really necessary to go to college for nine years to study literature? I'm beginning to think if you aren't going to be a doctor, lawyer, computer scientist, engineer, or teacher, why bother? If I had it to do all over again, I still would, but on the Internet, where I could complete my coursework at my own speed. I am thinking about taking library courses on the Internet through my local library if they become available. I should have done that long ago. I really feel at home with library work and have dreamed of doing it ever since I learned to read as a child.
The gist of this post is not to offer anyone excuses for dropping out of school. I think it is crucial for people to see things through. I only meant that an advanced degree is probably not necessary, and may delay the living of life, in some instances. It would have been foreign to my nature to quit anything. It was useful to have a Master's in order to teach college, but most of the other things I did mainly required just the completion of a high school diploma. However, the office skills classes I took as part of a paralegal class could also be useful for library work. I'm glad I know Excel, Word, WordPerfect, and Outlook, because they could be very useful.
I sometimes wonder the same thing with my husband. We've only recently discovered that he is an Aspie. He struggles in school, but did manage to get a Bachelor's in Spanish. He also has a teaching certificate in English, but out there in the "real" world, he can't find a job that he can handle for very long without getting fired because he doesn't pick up on the social cues. Now at age 37, and 2 autistic kids, plus 2 others on the spectrum, we realize why. Just the other day I thought, Why not try something that he has never done before...like a job where he doesn't have to work with people? (he has only had service-oriented jobs his entire life) I wonder.....
I wish there was a special "job coach" or something for adult Aspies.
Good luck to you and your family. I realize I am one of the fortunate ones when it comes to employment. I have had a job at the library for four years now and love it. I think I am successful at it because it involves categorizing and general knowledge, plus it is something I can do largely by myself. I strive to find at least 90 percent of the items on my list every day. Sometimes, if the list is really long, it isn't always possible, but I have at least been in the high 80 percent range.
Sometimes, when I hear of other people's struggles, I realize my own problems seem trivial. Still, I do think some Asperger's traits exist in me. I realize there are also more accomplished people than myself with AS, including, I suspect, Roger Bannister, someone I admire both for his considerable accomplishments and for his kindness and decency as a human being. His overall success in life inspires me.
I agree with you when you say your husband should try something where he works by himself. I work largely alone on my current job, and it is perfect for me. My ideal would be to get a full-time job which expands on my current work.