My son is always crying and fussing 5 years old - Autism Spectrum Message Board

Kolby · 01-17-2007, 02:19 PM

My 5 year old is always unhappy and crying and fussing and demanding. We gone through this with him before. OT helped some. I hate it and it makes me want to crawl up in a ball and hide from him.

There are times I really think he is spoiled. For one, each morning he sits on the couch and anouces when he is hungry. Then it's a guessing game for me.
I'll get some pancakes ready and mr. fussy doesn't want them that day. I'll ask him "What do you want to eat?" He mumbles something never taking his little eyes off of the TV. I get in his face and ask again still mumbles. So I make something esle. I'm tired. And He is running the house.

I realize we have given into him because his crying and fussing hits that nerve that I can't handle. It's like someone scratching their nails on a blackboard. Infact I am about to cry knowing that I am going home soon and he will want to eat the moment I step foot in the house. And then my battle begines. I need help! So how do I stop him from doing this to me?
Michelle

soozeq · 01-17-2007, 03:47 PM

Oh, Michelle, I wish I could help you, or tell you what to do. Has it always been this way, or is it new? I know at our house Liam is also awful in the mornings. My daughter will get up, lie on the sofa, watch cartoons and chill for a good hour when she wakes up in the a.m. But, but Liam. He's loud, demanding, and incredibly high maintenace in the a.m. To top it off, he rarely sleeps past 5:30. When he's sick or cutting teeth, it's more like 4:30. It just makes me so crazy. I also feel bad leaving him with my husband for extended periods, because it's hard for Shane to deal with. And I've only got the 2 kids.

Could he be in some kind of pain. I know when Liam's in pain, I have to figure it out from his behaviour, because he can't tell me. We've talked so much about gut problems lately. Maybe he has gas or a belly ache? We've had so much success with the dairy. Maybe it would work for you too?

just post if you feel blue, we're here.

Suzy

Kolby · 01-18-2007, 07:51 AM

Thanks!

Last night he was fine but did ask to eat right away. This morning he was O.K. too. It's just those times that it is so hard. You just never know how he's going to be from one day to the next. Last night I tried to get him away from the TV to complete a puzzle. Nope, he wouldn't have it. I did get him away after a bit but then he wanted to eat.

I said "Do I have the word FOOD on my head?" What is it with him seeing me and food? I guess that's a growing boy. Or maybe a boy who misses his trans fats or something.

It used to be that every morning he woudl cry and it would take a while for him to gather himself. And I hated to nap him because it was so horrible when he woke. That is better now. But the demands. They can really suck you dry.

I am lucky though in so many ways. He doesn't stim or stair or ignor anyone. He has eye contact. He is social at school and plays with kids.
He talks. Maybe I expect too much? I don't know.

Hmmm music....he does transition well at school with music. They play the piano and that means clean up time. Something to think about.
Thanks
Michelle

Laenini · 01-18-2007, 09:25 PM

"There are times I really think he is spoiled. For one, each morning he sits on the couch and announces when he is hungry. Then it's a guessing game for me.
I'll get some pancakes ready and mr. fussy doesn't want them that day. I'll ask him "What do you want to eat?" He mumbles something never taking his little eyes off of the TV. I get in his face and ask again still mumbles. So I make something else. I'm tired. And He is running the house. "

Just a thought, maybe make up a picture menu using PECS like cards and have him choose his meals for the week in advance? Or at least the meals he is allowed choices about? You could post it on the fridge after making it up together during a time of day that is not as difficult for him, then each morning its already decided what he is eating that day for breakfast. We do something similar with Zach and deciding on hot lunch at school. When he brings home each months new menu, we go through the whole thing and he circles the days he wants hot lunch and then X's out the days he wants cold lunch. Like your son Zach is hard to get going in the morning and having that decision made in advance is really helpful for us. I wouldn't let your son run you ragged either by allowing him to change his mind. If he had picked pancakes and then tries that morning to change to something different, I'd very matter of factly show him the menu and hold him to it. Just say something like "Look, today is Tuesday so its pancakes today. Cocoa Puffs are for Thursday", and then proceed with the pancakes.

Good Luck!
Leanne