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Old 01-28-2010, 10:06 AM   #1
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New mom on the block here.

Like many people here, I need help. My son is and 8, soon to be 9 yo Aspie with a myriad of behavioral issues. He was dx'd about three years ago, and if I had been able to swim to the other side of de'Nile, he would have been dx'd sooner. I finally broke down and started him on meds when it became apparent that the entire world was not going to stop and take care of him like I did despite every tool I would give them in his IEP. His behaviors were getting out of control with frequent suspensions from school for hands on activity at school. He is currently on Risperdal .25 BID and Lexapro 5 QD. So this was really like a night and day thing for him initailly and the begining of the year was awsome. But, he grew from June (when we started) till now like 2 inches and 10 lbs. Weight is not a problem...he really needed that 10 lbs badly! But now, he is so irritable and moody. His teacher jokingly says he is like a woman, at that time...and I totally agree. It's like his window of tolerance for others was closed, then wide open, and now slowly closing again...to where it is basically non existant. I am very hesitant to increase the Risperdal at this point. His doctor is a DAN Doctor with a son that has special needs as well. So I trust him very much. He has mentioned three options...increase Risperdal, Add Tenex, or just wait and see if he turns it around. That was in Dec...we have to do something now. He has had two referals this month, and is so close to a suspension....besides, he is not having any fun at all right now. Does he sound bipolar? He does have some ADHD, agression, depression issues too. He is loud, and cries sometimes. lot's of anxiety and gets overstimulated. Impulsive and serious social issues. I am wearing so thin...he is one of 4, but the other kids are neurotyp's. Please give me some advice or hope...

Thank you for your time.

 
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Old 01-28-2010, 07:49 PM   #2
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Re: New mom on the block here.

Sounds to me like he needs some private time, time to be all by himself where it's quiet and he is in control of what he does for an hour or two at a time, without having to interact with people. Being at school with all the people is very stressful, then he comes home to a house full of people. I personally wouldn't be able to cope with that much socializing. It's amazing how being all by ourselves for a while can revitalize and calm us down. As we get older we find ways to do it on our own - bathrooms, closets, locked storage rooms, the car, and my personal favorite, the woods.

One option you may want to consider is homeschooling. It's very overwhelming at first trying to figure out how - hours, textbooks, testing, etc., but then it gets much easier. Lot of homeschool groups out there to help, many provide band, sports, field trips, time to socialize with other homeschoolers in small groups.

10 years ago, my high school aged son was brain-fried, depressed, and overwhelmed by 11th grade, so I pulled him out of public school and we came up with a plan that worked for him. Wish I could have done it when he was much younger. The teacher complaints started around 5th grade, but he just had to tough it out until our situation changed. I actually think it did a lot of damage to him as a person, because he got worse and worse. My choices by 11th grade were having a high-school dropout or homeschooling because he just wasn't coping well.

Another school option would be a private school with small class sizes.

 
Old 01-30-2010, 03:04 PM   #3
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Re: New mom on the block here.

IMO, Your child is not getting his needs met at school. Could he go into a SDC program? Where their are teachers with specialized training ? Classroom sizes are are smaller and more teacher assistants . Children more like your child , he won't feel so "different" or need to act out . Meds are only one option... But, not always the right answer in the long run. Res. is known to cause weight gain, it is one of the side effects to the meds .
Maybe their are more options for school placements that would be better for your son, and help him be calmer and learn.

 
Old 01-31-2010, 01:51 AM   #4
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Re: New mom on the block here.

At this time I would consider a smaller behavior type classroom where there will be more attention able to be given to his behavior problems and needs. It sounds like he's barely keeping his head above water in a reg. classroom and that it is a daily struggle. He may become so relieved to be more understood in a behavior classroom that his other anxieties lessen.

Please keep us posted.

 
Old 01-31-2010, 01:53 PM   #5
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Re: New mom on the block here.

He does value his alone time, and we help him make that choice to take time alone based on escalation of behavior. But, I don't want to encourage him to isolate either just because it's easier. I have really thought about homeschooling, but I don't think that we can survive with four children on one income. I do have to make decisions based on how it affects everyone in our family too. But, we are moving to IL this summer, and they are so ahead of the grade with Autism and how they have incorporated special educational needs into thier school as opposed to where we are now. They also have schools and acadamies for Autistic children in all variations of the spectrum. But you hit the nail on the head...he is truly calmest when he can predict his environment. Thank you so much for the advice.

 
Old 01-31-2010, 01:58 PM   #6
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Re: New mom on the block here.

Options are so limited at his school...it's either mainstream or special education. He is been labled as far too intelligent for the sp. ed cirriculum and SCEP denied him too. So he is mainstreamed with an extreme IEP and other services. He has been doing very well, but even at home, he is far too quick to meltdown, and extremely impulive and aggressive at times with the other kids. I had responded to someone else that we are moving to IL...ST.Louis area..and they are huge into the Autism community. They seem to offer so much out there where as here I feel that he is tolerated...there it seems as though these children are celebrated!

 
Old 02-01-2010, 02:54 AM   #7
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Re: New mom on the block here.

that's great that you'll be moving to an area that has these great autism related services. it sounds as though he'll be understood so much better and most of all you can find far better services for him within the school district.

perhaps you should consider adding tenex to see if it does help calm his nervous system a bit so he can cope with the things he has to deal with. also with four kids, that in itself could be overstimulating and the addition of tenex might be a big help. i personally do not believe in homeschooling because i feel that our kids do need to live and learn in the outside world and although we can make a lot of adaptations in their day, it is still important to be learning coping skills in school as well. and if it takes the addition of tenex, and it works, that would be ideal for now. good luck to you!

 
Old 02-01-2010, 06:16 PM   #8
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Re: New mom on the block here.

Thank you...so much. I heard home schooling and I instantly jumped to the conclusion that I was not doing what was best for him...not that I feel that is what anyone was implying. I thought of it too..just came to that same end result like you said. I can make everything how he needs to feel safe and flouish and be successful, but the minute he has to live in the real world, he will never make it. So it is harder for him to deal with everything, and I want to help him be able to. He hates feeling like this...he really liked feeling "calmer" when he first started the Risperdal and that was all I needed to know that it was the right thing for him. It is just so hard, and I am really losing a lot of faith in other people. He is such a beautfiul, and loving child...I just want him to love being him for who he is. Thank you for sharing with me...I feel okay today

 
Old 02-01-2010, 08:44 PM   #9
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Re: New mom on the block here.

Hang in there; take one day at a time. Does your son have to try really hard at school? He may be autistic instead of an aspie? Is he in any special ed classes? It sounds like he may need some one on one in the classroom. Be careful with the meds, everyone is different. My husband who is autistic spent his entire childhood not on any kind of meds. He mother finally broke down and put him in an institution for one year, four months and 23 days. She could not control him at all! He asked Jesus into his heart in the institution and was a new person! He was able to come home. He is still autistic but he was able to control himself after asking Jesus into his heart.

 
Old 02-02-2010, 03:34 AM   #10
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Re: New mom on the block here.

Codysmom - After looking back at your first post and seeing he's on a fairly low dose of Risperdol (.25 bid), you might also consider raising it another .25 since you had such good results with it. This is not at all a high dose of Risperdol so that might be something to talk over with his Dr.

Lexapro may also be a problem. It is in the SSRI (selective serotonin) class of drugs. My son could never take them as they made him too hyper and nervous and agitation eventually set it. Just thought I'd mention that but on the other hand, for some, Lexapro can be very good.

 
Old 03-30-2010, 03:51 PM   #11
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Re: New mom on the block here.

I have a son that is 7 yrs old and sounds just like your son. My son is diagnosed with ADHD and Bipolar disorder. He currently takes Risperdal, Tenex and Lithium. The Risperdal was a life saver and like night and day with him. The tenex seems to help how long the meltdown lasts, but not the frequency. I hope that this is some help to you and if I can do anything for you I would be happy to help if possible.

Last edited by moderator2; 03-30-2010 at 05:39 PM. Reason: please do not post your email address

 
Old 04-04-2010, 01:16 AM   #12
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Re: New mom on the block here.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Codysmom29 View Post
Like many people here, I need help. My son is and 8, soon to be 9 yo Aspie with a myriad of behavioral issues. He was dx'd about three years ago, and if I had been able to swim to the other side of de'Nile, he would have been dx'd sooner. I finally broke down and started him on meds when it became apparent that the entire world was not going to stop and take care of him like I did despite every tool I would give them in his IEP. His behaviors were getting out of control with frequent suspensions from school for hands on activity at school. He is currently on Risperdal .25 BID and Lexapro 5 QD. So this was really like a night and day thing for him initailly and the begining of the year was awsome. But, he grew from June (when we started) till now like 2 inches and 10 lbs. Weight is not a problem...he really needed that 10 lbs badly! But now, he is so irritable and moody. His teacher jokingly says he is like a woman, at that time...and I totally agree. It's like his window of tolerance for others was closed, then wide open, and now slowly closing again...to where it is basically non existant. I am very hesitant to increase the Risperdal at this point. His doctor is a DAN Doctor with a son that has special needs as well. So I trust him very much. He has mentioned three options...increase Risperdal, Add Tenex, or just wait and see if he turns it around. That was in Dec...we have to do something now. He has had two referals this month, and is so close to a suspension....besides, he is not having any fun at all right now. Does he sound bipolar? He does have some ADHD, agression, depression issues too. He is loud, and cries sometimes. lot's of anxiety and gets overstimulated. Impulsive and serious social issues. I am wearing so thin...he is one of 4, but the other kids are neurotyp's. Please give me some advice or hope...

Thank you for your time.
Many others have provided very valuable input, so I wont be redundant. You mentioned your son has "grown" recently and he is not on a high dose of Risperdal. Therefore, he may need an increase or re-adjustment in the dose.

Often parents feel there is something wrong in increasing medication when (up to a point) this is something that is regularly done by physicians. His difficulties may be resolved by a slight increase and/or change in his medication, and he may then be able to stay in his current classroom without that much difficulty.

 
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