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Old 10-06-2004, 08:20 PM   #1
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mlachowicz HB User
I give Up!!!!!

Hi All! It has been a while since I posted, but have been lurking in the shadows in my own despair! This Friday I will be 3 months post op from my microdisectomy for laminectomy on L4-5, L5-S1 - - - I am not feeling any better. This just SUCKS! I have been going to pt, but nothing seems to help, only make it worse. I am scared to death that when I return to my neuroseurgeon he is going to suggest going ahead with the fusion. I would love to get anyones advice. Thanks!\
~M~

 
Old 10-06-2004, 08:48 PM   #2
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Location: Dallas, Texas
Posts: 764
Rhonni HB User
Re: I give Up!!!!!

I was in the same boat. It seemed that almost immediately after my laminectomy/disectomy, I had scar tissue and arthritis build right back up. 8 months later I changed doctors, went to an ortho instead, and had my fusion on Sept 10.

I feel sooooo much better. The fusion isn't as awful as I anticipated. I won't lie, the first couple weeks were tough, but I've already told my husband that if I don't get any better than I am right now, I'll be ok because it's still tremendously better than I got after my first surgery.

Don't suffer. See your doc, or get another doc's opinion too. Just do whatever it takes to get better. No sense dragging it out.

 
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Old 10-06-2004, 08:57 PM   #3
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Jessie1 HB User
Re: I give Up!!!!!

Sorry to hear you are still in so much pain! I'm kind of in the same situation that you are. I'm six months post-op, and having horrible pain (however, mine is due to a car accident 3 weeks post-op). I am also looking at a fusion. I decided on that after I tried everything else- at this point, I just don't want to be in pain anymore, and I want my life back. I have a chance of that if I get a fusion. Even if it helps only a little, that will still be a relief- but I'm looking forward to being 100% pain free! Go see your doctor- he's there to help you!

Jessie

 
Old 10-06-2004, 09:10 PM   #4
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beachgirl01 HB User
Re: I give Up!!!!!

Hi there,
I don't have any advice for you but I just wanted to say hang in there. I'm really sorry to hear that you are having such a tough time with this. If the fusion is what you ultimately need than I just want to wish you the best of luck. Try to stay positive. Take care of yourself and let us know how you are doing and what your neuro decides to do. Good luck. Kristy.

 
Old 10-06-2004, 09:45 PM   #5
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Location: San Diego CA
Posts: 83
thekeith HB User
Re: I give Up!!!!!

i have been to that edge so many times..
hang in there.
what helps me is to risign my life away,
as in.

say it out loud "I am going to be in bed for 6 months"
just accept it,

the minute I moved back into my moms (as a 33 year old man)
and just said "I am done, I am gonna lay here, no one wants anything from me, I am going to just BE"
was the minute I started feeling a bit better

its 3 years later and I rehurt myself, but i have been there, and i actually got better.

I sware this can help

30 mins ago, I was close to tears, my girlfriend said "um are you ok?, your breath is really labored"

and it was, I was in such pain

now its 30 mins and I feel better, I know a "brief moment" of not feeling like $#%# isnt a "life"

but it can get better

 
Old 10-07-2004, 12:47 AM   #6
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Posts: 300
Haw'nCarl HB User
Re: I give Up!!!!!

Aloha ~M~,

Don't be so hard on yourself, fusion is not the end of the world, I am to the point now where I am almost a fully functional human being again, and I had 3 levels fused.

You may also be a candidate for ADR, which might possibly make you even more functional than if you were to have a fusion, of course I am just guessing.

Don't give up on yourself, you'll be amazed one day, I know it, because I said so, now no more worrying about what your doctor is going to recommend, just be confident in yourself that you will make the right decision and don't look back.

The lemons that I got were starting to turn brown and smell too, but I just added a little sugar and some ice ([I]gotta have some ice[/I]) and now I have sweet, [I]brown[/I] lemonade, but at least it is drinkable now.

Good Luck and God Bless, I hope and pray that someday you will look back on this and say...well I don't know what you'll say ([I]I probably couldn't type it here anyway without getting censored[/I] ) , but you will look back on this unfortunate slice of your life and sigh (heavily).

Carl
__________________
3level laminectomy,discectomy&PLIF L3-S1 02/20/04
6cages 8screws 2rods (oh my!) w/local bone graft
Success! Yay!

 
Old 10-07-2004, 05:58 AM   #7
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Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 590
Mistina HB User
Re: I give Up!!!!!

I can relate. I am a year post op and knew from about 2-3 months that things weren't going to get better after my discectomy/lamy. Physical therapy helped at first but after that time, it only KILLED me. I will be having a fusion at L4 L5 on the 21st. I am ready. I cannot deal with this for a year longer. It has been three years and I'm ready to turn over a new leaf so the fusion things isn't scaring me so much. It's scary but I'm so anxious to get better. Hang in there. There is life after fusion!

Love and prayers,
Christina

 
Old 10-07-2004, 09:09 AM   #8
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 284
ladybird988 HB Userladybird988 HB User
Re: I give Up!!!!!

I'm also 3 mons post op from microdisckectomy on L4/L5. I have to say that just this week I began to really feel better. But that can go up and down. You may need more time to heal. Are you any better at all? I make small gains each week. If you haven't improved at all, I would tell the doctor. otherwise, I hear this can be a very long recovery. I know your frustration. It's hard to not be able to sleep and be so out of it on pain pills you can't think. I'm still on percocet, about one a day. Walking in the swimming pool is helping me. Also, light massage and electrical stim. From what I hear, 3 months post op is not long at all.

 
Old 10-08-2004, 10:56 AM   #9
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mlachowicz HB User
Re: I give Up!!!!!

To All:

Thank you so much for your continued support and concern! I went today to physical therapy again, and as usual I felt good when I left, but am once again feeling pain in my lower back, down into my leg. At least it isn't my right leg all the time anymore, now it is more in my left. Joy!!!!

Thanks again!
~M~

 
Old 10-08-2004, 01:28 PM   #10
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lfoster21 HB User
Wink Re: I give Up!!!!!

Oh M,
I am so sorry that you are going through so much. I am back from my surgery and it's been awhile since I have been on the boards. I was hoping you were doing well. All I can tell you is that if you have to have the fusion..it's not nearly as bad as I had thought and from the suggestions from this board I was well prepared. I am now 6 wks. post op from the Laminectomy and fusion. Iwas in the hospital for 5 days (because I got sick from the meds.) and the next 2 weeks were hard. But it was harder than it needed to be because I tried to wien myself off the meds. too early. Now, at 6 wks. I am walking 2 miles every day and am so happy I had it done. I was not able to walk more than 20 min. (w/ a cane) w/o extreme pain, I could only lift up to 2 lbs. (a gallon of milk was impossible to lift) Now, I can lift 10 lbs. and walk 45 min. (w/o a cane or walker.) I am getting better each day. Please keep us posted and I will keep you in my prayers.

Lorie
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Last edited by lfoster21; 10-08-2004 at 01:30 PM.

 
Old 10-10-2004, 04:49 AM   #11
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mlachowicz HB User
Re: I give Up!!!!!

Hi Lorie!
I am happy to hear that you are feeling so much better! Thank you for responding!!!
To All:
I am trying to hold onto every possible good thought and not lean towards the fusion being my only option, but I am beginning to loose hope. My pt said that he feels my pain is coming from my sacrum area, and has begun deep tissue massage... of course it helps for a while after, but then the pain returns... no less then before.
I will be calling my Dr. tomorrow to discuss. I am going to ask him if I can go for another MRI, as I am concerned that I reherniated, but this time to the left. If that proves to be true I think that I will go ahead with the fusion, as I do not know what my odds are with having DDD that I will ever actually heal from a microdisectomy/laminectomy....
Being 26, married, with a 17 month old daughter, this decision is very difficult. I'm scared that if I go ahead with the fusion, within a few years my discs above will begin to wear, and I will be forced to have another surgery. To make it worse, my husband, who has been more then supportive throughout this entire situation, has made it clear that he would rather me not have another operation. I am very frustrated, depressed, and completely misreable! Between the pain, trying to get thru my daily life, and the constant thought in my mind that this surgery just didn't do what it should have I want to SCREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ahhhhh, sorry to vent like this, but it actually felt better!
~M~

 
Old 10-10-2004, 06:04 PM   #12
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lfoster21 HB User
Wink Re: I give Up!!!!!

I can hear your frustration...I am so sorry you are going through all of this and then to have your family to think about and their thoughts. I know what that is like. Just don't give up...there are still options . My only thought, looking back on everything...if you end up needing surgery (and I hope you can find releif w/o surgery) but if that is the case, no matter what everyone thinks about it now,the whole thing will be such a small amount of time in the long run. One day you and your family will look back on the whole thing as a memory and be glad you are feeling better. Let us know what the Dr. and the MRI show.

Lorie
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Last edited by lfoster21; 10-10-2004 at 06:19 PM.

 
Old 10-10-2004, 06:41 PM   #13
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carol632 HB User
Re: I give Up!!!!!

[I]I'm so sorry you are having such a bad time. I want to respond to a couple of things you said. You are concerned about the levels above and below going bad. I had my first fusion at L5-S1 in l981. To date, the level above is fine. I am developing some problems at L1-2 but it has been 23 years!
Secondly, let no one, absolutely no one, decide this for you. It is your decision and your decision only. I used to listen to my husband's opinion and sometimes let him sway me. MISTAKE. I let him talk me into being part of a study my OSS was doing...a blind study. I ended up being one of those whose BAK was filled with my own bone! I have had nothing but trouble since then (l997). I wanted to just do donor bone with the cage. So listen to yourself. You know what is best for you and for your body. All considered, if the fusion is successful, your whole family will be better off.

No matter what you decide, I wish you the very best.

Carol[/I]
__________________
2 lami's, 3 fusions
bone spur removal
cerv. fusion, 1 level
morphine pump

 
Old 10-11-2004, 11:11 AM   #14
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mlachowicz HB User
Re: I give Up!!!!!

Thanks again for all your help and support. I left a message for the Dr. secy to call me back. I'll keep you all posted.
~M~

 
Old 10-11-2004, 11:23 PM   #15
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mlachowicz HB User
Re: I give Up!!!!!

Dr. secy thinks I should go for another MRI, she said she was going to check with Dr. and let me know for sure tomorrow.

 
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