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Old 01-22-2006, 03:17 PM   #1
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Help, please?

I wasn't sure where to post this. I hope it's in the right category, and I also hope this isn't too long of a read.

Ok, where do I begin. I've been diagnosed with depression for 8 years now (since I was 11) and it hasn't cleared up since. I've been on medication and gotten treatment from professionals and counselors. The counseling helped a bit, but I can't say I ever noticed much help from the medication. Here's the basic runup. I have no idea what my problem is. I was hospitalised a few years back for severe pain in my right side which was intense enough to make me collapse onto my knee and cause me to break into cold sweats. The source of the problem was never pinpointed. Every time I get a respitory illness the pain comes back in my right side.

I have flashes in my vision. Ocassionally I will see shining diamond like things over my eyes. It would almost seem like I would have a kalediascope (spelling?) over my eye, except it also shines and shimmers. I had it a few years ago once or twice and dismissed it, but it recently started happening again. I also ocassionally get red flashes where one side of my vision will go entirely red and then suddenly everything is fine again. I recently got over a respitory illness which caused me a lot of problems. It was supposedly bronchitis, and it gave me a lot of breathing problems. I've had pnuemonia before (when I was checked into the hospital back in Jan 2003) and it wasn't nearly as bad as this recent thing was. I was on antibiotics and it was accompanied yet again by the same sharp pain in my side nearly every time I'd breathe. In addition to this I've been noticing an increase in the amount of distortion in my vision. It seems whatever I look at is moving. Not literally, but like something would be moving over it and vibrating, similar to little tiny particles. It never goes away, but I have learned to live with it. It gets worse when I go outside and look around in the sunlight at anything. I've also developed an intense sensitivity to light. I usually have to look at the ground when I walk and it's a sunny day, or wear a hood if it's cold, due to my accidents with sunglasses I gave up on them. I'm currently enrolled in college, but I haven't been able to focus on my work since I got back from summer vacation of sorts. I've been known for being depressed, but this is ridiculous. Ever since I got back from Texas I've felt extremely drained of any energy and I could just sleep all day long. I'm also much more prone to becoming depressed. One odd thing about the trip to Texas was that at one point after having lawn seats at a concert, they next day I became very ill. There was an odd rash that broke out on my skin in very large red blotches that also puffed up a bit. I became extremely sick for about 2-3 days where I didn't even want to move at all or get off of the couch. It cleared up as soon as it arrived, but I thought for a while maybe it was a spider bite of some sort, because I had never felt sick quite like that before or with rashes so prevelant on my lower back. Ever since then I've noticed a severe decrease in my performance in college. I have slacked off on my studies considerably and I can't focus on anything. Although I've spent numerous ocassions attempting to isolate myself from distractions it doesn't seem to work. I have a list of things I'd like to do but I never do them. My body feels old. I can't explain it more than that. I'm 19, and I know I shouldn't have back pain and knee pain from arthritis this early in life. At least, I would seriously hope not. I also get the ocassional chest pains which are pretty worrysome, and an odd feeling like my heart is beating off course. There are moments when the back of my head will tingle really strangely and then suddenly the tingling will increase until I become extremely upset with someone and lash out at them. It almost seems like something beyond my control at times. Other parts of my face have tingled too, but for the most part it's strictly the back of my neck where it meets my head. Maybe these things are normal and I'm ust overreacting. Perhaps they have no significance at all. However, I can't afford the trips to and from the doctor at this point because the nearest medical facility is too far for me to travel. I've felt so terrible recently both emotionally and physically that I am about ready to give up trying. I feel like I'm 90 or something and I'm only 19. Also, I'd like to add to this after remembering. I used to absolutely love reading but it has become nearly impossible for me to follow the words on the pages now without my mind slipping onto something else or the words just becoming things I scan over without comprehending it. None of it seems to make sense and it's extremely frustrating, because it always used to.

Probably a typical dramatic rant, but anyway, I just thought I'd get a second opinion on it. Sorry for the post being so long. If anyone has any ideas if perhaps these things can be connected then please let me know. I know my writing isn't exactly abundant in coherency but that's one of the issues I've been facing lately: I can't seem to focus on anything anymore.

Last edited by Frostbite; 01-22-2006 at 03:21 PM.

 
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Old 01-22-2006, 03:33 PM   #2
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Re: Help, please?

I am not sure I can help, you have so much here, that I would suggest you may have a neurological issue as far as your vision is concerned.

As you say you are depressed, I was wondering if these strange episodes happen during stressful times. If so, you might have psychosomatic issues due to anxiety. Do you have any history of hypochondria? Not to say that this is invented on your part, but perhaps your subconscious is causing these myriads of problems.

Last edited by barbaric_yawp; 01-22-2006 at 03:34 PM.

 
Old 01-22-2006, 03:40 PM   #3
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Re: Help, please?

Quote:
Originally Posted by barbaric_yawp
I am not sure I can help, you have so much here, that I would suggest you may have a neurological issue as far as your vision is concerned.

As you say you are depressed, I was wondering if these strange episodes happen during stressful times. If so, you might have psychosomatic issues due to anxiety. Do you have any history of hypochondria? Not to say that this is invented on your part, but perhaps your subconscious is causing these myriads of problems.
Hmm, actually, not that I am aware of. In fact, I am usually the one denying that there's a problem and being dragged to the doctors by a family member. I think the reason there is so much here is because I've never really spoken about it before to anyone until now. Although, I wont rule it out as a possibility. Maybe I'm overreacting, but I also just feel extremely off beat and it's been limited to the past 2-3 years that I've felt this bad. All of this is a combination of about 3 years worth of issues. They don't all happen simultaneously but they've just happened over the past 3 years.

 
Old 01-22-2006, 03:46 PM   #4
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Re: Help, please?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Frostbite
Hmm, actually, not that I am aware of. In fact, I am usually the one denying that there's a problem and being dragged to the doctors by a family member. I think the reason there is so much here is because I've never really spoken about it before to anyone until now. Although, I wont rule it out as a possibility. Maybe I'm overreacting, but I also just feel extremely off beat and it's been limited to the past 2-3 years that I've felt this bad. All of this is a combination of about 3 years worth of issues. They don't all happen simultaneously but they've just happened over the past 3 years.

Yeah, you are probably right. Have you seen any specialists? Are you more physically ill during depression?

 
Old 01-22-2006, 04:08 PM   #5
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Re: Help, please?

Quote:
Originally Posted by barbaric_yawp
Yeah, you are probably right. Have you seen any specialists? Are you more physically ill during depression?

I have seen specialists when I become sick... not sure what your question is asking... exactly. I've also been in and out of counseling and on and off of antidepressants since age 11, so I have seen specialists for that and been medicated on several ocassions for it. I honestly can't say there is or isn't a connection. I am depressed 90% of the time. I can say I only become sick enough for a doctor visit on an estimative average of once per year, though. I know I've never gone to the doctor and had them tell me I'm not sick, though. Although I wonder if this has to do with money sometimes. The depression is the main thing worrying me, because it seems to keep me from getting anywhere and it's a huge distraction, but it simply wont go away. I don't notice any pattern in depression/sickness, though.

Last edited by Frostbite; 01-22-2006 at 04:09 PM.

 
Old 01-22-2006, 04:12 PM   #6
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Re: Help, please?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Frostbite
I have seen specialists when I become sick... not sure what your question is asking... exactly. .... The depression is the main thing worrying me, because it seems to keep me from getting anywhere and it's a huge distraction, but it simply wont go away. I don't notice any pattern in depression/sickness, though.

I am asking if you have seen any neurological docs or other such chronic pain management specialists--not just general practicioners. Or if you have seen an eye doc about your vision.

Are you on any meds for depression?

 
Old 01-22-2006, 04:28 PM   #7
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Re: Help, please?

Quote:
Originally Posted by barbaric_yawp
I am asking if you have seen any neurological docs or other such chronic pain management specialists--not just general practicioners. Or if you have seen an eye doc about your vision.

Are you on any meds for depression?
No, I have not, unfortunately that would be far too expensive. I have been to an eye doctor but I never mentioned the issues because the problems had stopped for quite some time. I did get glasses through during my visit. I've gotten more floaters in my vision too, but perhaps that comes with age. The recurrence of sparkling had brought my attention back to my eye problems, though. I usually dismiss it pretty quickly and just ignore it or get used to it. I thought I was hallucinating or something for a while, but I don't know what this is. I am currently taking medication for depression welbutrin xl 300mg.

 
Old 01-22-2006, 04:32 PM   #8
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Re: Help, please?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Frostbite
No, I have not, unfortunately that would be far too expensive. I have been to an eye doctor but I never mentioned the issues because the problems had stopped for quite some time. I did get glasses through during my visit. I've gotten more floaters in my vision too, but perhaps that comes with age. The recurrence of sparkling had brought my attention back to my eye problems, though. I usually dismiss it pretty quickly and just ignore it or get used to it. I thought I was hallucinating or something for a while, but I don't know what this is. I am currently taking medication for depression welbutrin xl 300mg.

Yes, cost can be prohibative, but a specialist of some kind may be the only one that can properly diagnose you. Have you given your doc a run down of your problems? You should do this even if you are not exp. them at the time. This may tell him something. Look into Welutrin, see if any of its side effects match your own.

 
Old 01-23-2006, 12:31 PM   #9
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Re: Help, please?

some would say lyme or something similar

 
Old 01-24-2006, 05:47 AM   #10
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Re: Help, please?

Barb is right,you DO need to seek out a neurologist for a full eval.something is definitely not right with your overall health and needs to really be looked into.despite the travel issues and money problems you NEED to find a way somehow to get this evaluated.something is very obviously wrong and needs to be Dxed.even having an MRI would possibly be of great help at least in ruling in or out some neuro cause stemming fro the brain or even the upper spinal area.the symptoms you have described along with the depression definitely are NOT normal and could all be related to some sort of issue stemming from your brain.Going to an er during one of these episodes and demanding answers would really be your best bet.despite the fact that you may not actually have insirance or the ability to pay immediately for treatment,by law,they have to treat you.you need help.this could all be stemming from any number of medical issues some minor some possibly major,but something is not right and needs attention and evaluation.

if you do not get this all evaluated soon,i really cannot see your depression really ever lifting.the fact that you are getting no response from meds could also mean the depression is actually being caused by some other type of issue either within the brain or an imbalance of something within a body system,or even hormones.

Have you ever had any type of actual testing done on blood or radiologic?i do think an MRI could possibly reveal an underlying reason for all of your symptoms.it is definitely needed in your situation.it could rule in and rule out alot of possibilities here.But you DO need to put your health first,no matter what.I hope someone has some answers for you.just get moving on this as soon as possible.you don't have to live like this,you know?
good luck and please keep us posted on anything you find out,K? FB
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Old 01-25-2006, 05:29 PM   #11
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Re: Help, please?

Hey everyone. Thanks for your response. I will get to the doctors at my first chance (this weekend). I will go to the charity hospital and wait in line. It saves money. I had some more vision issues today, and I also saw some auras around things that weren't even bright. I had a lot of stray darting lights in my vision too. It was weird. I made it fun by looking at things and trying to chace the stray lights and auras around. Thanks again.

 
Old 01-25-2006, 07:01 PM   #12
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Re: Help, please?

maybe it has something to do with the sun?? Some people are allergic

 
Old 01-26-2006, 01:23 PM   #13
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Re: Help, please?

Hi Frostbite. I am sorry you are feeling so bad. I highly recommend that you consider Lyme Disease as a possible diagnosis. Lyme disease is a multi-system bacterial infection caused from the bite of an infected tick. It can cause many seemingly unrelated symptoms. You mentioned getting some kind of a bite and rash when you were in Texas. Many people are bitten by ticks without knowing it because they are tiny and inject a numbing agent so you cannot feel them on you.

Below is a Lyme Disease symptom list. You can have any combination of symptoms.

Unexplained fevers, sweats, chills, or flushing
Unexplained weight change--loss or gain
Fatigue, tiredness, poor stamina
Unexplained hair loss
Swollen glands
Sore throat
Testicular pain/pelvic pain
Unexplained menstrual irregularity
Unexplained milk production: breast pain
Irritable bladder or bladder dysfunction
Sexual dysfunction or loss of libido
Upset stomach
Change in bowel function-constipation, diarrhea
Chest pain or rib soreness
Shortness of breath, cough
Heart palpitations, pulse skips, heart block
Any history of a heart murmur or valve prolapse?
Joint pain or swelling
Stiffness of the joints, neck, or back
Muscle pain or cramps
Twitching of the face or other muscles
Headache
Neck creeks and cracks, neck stiffness, neck pain
Tingling, numbness, burning or stabbing sensations, shooting pains
Facial paralysis (Bell's Palsy)
Eyes/Vision: double, blurry, increased floaters, light sensitivity
Ears/Hearing: buzzing, ringing, ear pain, sound sensitivity
lncreased motion sickness, vertigo, poor balance
Lightheadedness, wooziness
Tremor
Confusion, difficulty in thinking
Difficulty with concentration, reading
Forgetfulness, poor short term memory
Disorientation: getting lost, going to wrong places
Difficulty with speech or writing
Mood swings, irritability,depression
Disturbed sleep-too much, too little, early awakening
Exaggerated symptoms or worse hangover from alcohol


When Lyme disease is a possibility, it is very important to see a knowledgeable doctor. Many doctors do not understand Lyme and treat with outdated protocols. No test is completely reliable and a knowledgeable doctor will consider your entire history and not rely solely on test results. Besides Lyme, ticks can transmit several co-infections including Babesiosis, Ehrlichiosis (HME & HGE), Bartonella, and Mycoplasma. Many people who have Lyme are co-infected. It is important to be tested by a Lyme reputable lab such as IgeneX in Palo Alto, CA.

To me your symptoms sound very much like Lyme. Before I was diagnosed, I also experienced the difficulty reading and focusing that you describe. If you post where you are located, I will tell you of the closest knowledgable doctor to you that I know of.

Hang in there okay? You will find out what is wrong.

Last edited by ticker; 01-26-2006 at 07:20 PM.

 
Old 01-27-2006, 01:10 PM   #14
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Re: Help, please?

Hello, ticker. These symptoms sound so much like what I've been experiencing that it actually scares me. I had a vision episode today in my class and after I got Extremely depressed. It was intense enough depression to keep me from checking up on a job that I might have been able to get. Taking the initiative to even find out what's wrong even seems like too much of an obstacle lately. Also, I looked up some more on Lyme's and read that dangerous tick bites cause swelling. I woke up when I had that rash with a swollen sore throat and my lips and cheeks had puffed up also. In addition my neck has been popping more and my posture has changed since then. I do have the rining in my ears. I thought I was going insane, honestly.

I am currently living near Eunice, Louisiana. I'll look more into this. I am almost certain this sounds exactly like what I have experienced. I've battled with depression for years, but since Texas the spells have become increasingly difficult and my grades and income have suffered greatly over it.

Last edited by moderator2; 01-31-2006 at 11:16 AM.

 
Old 01-28-2006, 07:17 AM   #15
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Re: Help, please?

If this is what you feel may be going on,see a rheumatologist for a very thorough blood work up.but i do think they can test for this now in any actual docs office?I know when I saw a rheumy doc about a possible wierd thing happening inside my knee,he said we are going to do a bit of blood work.geez,it was a four page list of bloodwork that tested for just about everything and anything possible that could cause any sort of inflammation.unbelieveable! but one of the many things that was ctually tested for was lymes.This REALLY should be tested at the next opportunity,to at least rule it out as one possibility.just a thought,FB

 
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