Dena Doo

High 5's on "tellin" your psych what you want!! I was silent for so long because, hey, they have the stupid certificates on the wall, not me. I also have a disease of my sphenoid sinus, which is the sinus closest to the brain and also has the thinest bone before reaching the brain. I get extremely bad inner ear infections which have to be monitored. I listed all the meds on my chart (I'm always scratching out and adding on). Well, when I was on Wellbutrin the FOOL perscribed Alegra D. I tell you what, I felt like I was inside of someone else's body! The D in Alegra is decongestant, you can't take that with Wellbutrin!!! My pharmasist told that to me! Bam, in the trash. What's up with that?? Anyhoo, I told my shrink that I want off of the Wellbutrin, so he said, "uh, okay". After I got weined off, he put me on Lamictal. Yuckster!! Too many Zaps for me! Took that junk for 5 weeks, filled another scrip then told him I wanted to get weined off of that one too, he said, "uh, okay but how does it make you feel?" Didn't he write my symptoms down from all the other meds I took??? Wish I would have heard of the perfect term of ZAPS. It gets so frustrating when they get all the bucks, and they ask stupid cr*p all the time. It's very obvious that these forms of medications were not what I needed. Any fool could tell. So, I told my shrink, and remember, he knows my life history, including my struggles with RA, "Is it possible since I couldn't take any pain medicine for my bones, therefore drank alcohol to ease the pain, do you think that the alcohol was making me sink deeper into depression? Because alcohol IS a depressant. Well, this is what I have done within one year. I stopped taking my Enbrel shots twice a week, dropped that down to once a week, then once a month then -bam- zero. No shots. I have absolutely no pain whatsoever ANYWHERE! My RA doc took x-rays (I didn't even tell her that I weined myself off of the shots) she could not understand why I didn't have extreme pain anymore and also why the errosion not only ceased, but errosion actually forming bone???? Two years ago when I had a very bad "attack" of the deep blue sea blues, I was hospitalized. I quit drinking the day I went in, and I haven't drank since. I was always in pain, therefore, I always drank. Needless to say, I was never sober....very functional at work and home, but still, never really sober. I wasn't falling down or anything like that, but I drank until it numbed the pain of the RA and the Blues. Now, the doc is askin ME what I think I should take. Told him I needed just something for my nerves. I take 4mg's a day of Klonopin and I'm chillin. Now I can listen to my little girl yell and jump about without holding my ears and running outside because I couldn't stand the noise. BUT, and it's a BIG but! Where did the pain from my RA go? What happened to my alcoholism? How is it that I can get out of the house and sing and speak in church, and also teach? I fell to my knees with a broken heart and spirit and I cried for God to help me. And guess what? He did just that. I can run, jump, spin, ride a bike, pick up my 3 year old, squeeze the water out of my wash cloth, etc. I do not drink and have never went to not ONE AA thingie. I hit bottom and didn't have anywhere else to look, but up. He heard me. Now, I do, every now and then have a bad mood swing, but not EVEN like before! So, my wobbly friend, you too can beat this thing! Consult your doc first cause mine thought I was just depressed. Nah, I attempted to take away something that wasn't even mine in the first place, my life. God didn't want me playin Him. Uh uh. I diagnosed myself with BPII and alcoholism and extreme mood swings. I filled the light in that dark hole in my life with Jesus. And he took ALL OF MY PHYSICAL AND MENTAL PAIN AWAY. I am a walking miracle. Just ask any of my doctors. They don't know how a crippled up RA woman who is depressed and an alcoholic, can be free of all of these diseases. Well, I'm not saying that I am completely well. But, at least I have the urges to get in my car and drive to the store, as to before, I just would do without some of the things I needed. I open EVERY SINGLE blind in my home so the sun can shine in as opposed to me sunkin on the couch with my p.j.'s, in the dark, watching t.v. and also watching the dirty clothes pile up because I couldn't and wouldn't get off of the couch. Sorry if I'm scrambling around with my story, there was just so much to say. Please don't give up your trust in the Lord. I fell to my knees and prayed and have been living the good life, the straight and narrow and He has blessed me abundantly. I hope not only you read how God took all of these horrible things away from me, but more people that maybe had even one of the ailments that I had. Don't give up Wobbly, there is a life out there just waiting for you, and all you have to do is trust and believe. I wouldn't be here at all if it weren't for HIM. I thank HIM everyday, and so does my entire family and friends. Good luck my friend, remember, there's somebody out there just wanting you to trust in HIM. Give it a shot, but only if you feel it in your heart that He, Himself is the Great Physician.
Your friend,
Dena Doo