Feel like talking, about what though
I come here every day to read and I feel like I have so much on my mind and want to join in, but I am not sure I even have this bipolar disorder so I feel kind of funny posting, but I don't know who can even relate to me anymore, so i thought I might stop by and ramble a little and see what happens.
Today is Tues. Starting like Sat, I was a little irritable and a little tired. Sunday went well, had plenty of energy into Monday morning, there was really no stopping me. exercised, ran a little, laughed a ton, talked 800 miles and hour. typed in my journal nonstop to get everything out (now I am thinking of it I still missed some stuff). Anyhow, by last night I was screaming and yelling at the kids, just wanted to sleep and wrap up in a million blankets. I am freezing to death all the time and I am so tired of being cold all the time. I just HATE it. Oh, and I can't remember anything. Like who I told something to or even if I said something or just thought it. I think I might repeat myself a lot, but people are just being polite not to say. I am swinging between wanting to do everything to wanting to do nothing.
Now my period came today, I have never had pms issues, but maybe I do now, I dont' know anymore. i cant control a lot of things right now. I go from no eating and all coffee, to all anxious eating all day long. I know I should slow on caffeine and eat better and its like I just get going and I am like a runaway train.
I have been off the depakote (after being on a wk and a half) for 2 weeks now. I have a new therapist I see tomorrow at noon and I can't wait. I always look forward to these appts and get such a let down, that I am flooring the car and screaming obscenities the whole way home. I am hoping this time will be different.
Thank you anyone for listening. I really do appreciate any comments, advice, etc.