i just want to begin by saying that i've read so many stories and i ha d no ideajust how many people are going through my same situation. i have been living with bi polar disease since i was 16 and did'nt know it i was only just diagnosed as having it only after last year. i had the most frightening experience of my life , dec of 03 i had my youngest of four sons. Needless to say my hormones went off the scales. i started feeling more and more agitatedtoward the end of the term , before long i was yelling all the time ,followed by crying spells and just feeling sad and lonely all the time .One morniing after an all night with our new born ,just two weeks after we brought him home, my husband came to relieve me but it was too late , it was about 5:30 am. I was exhausted. All i remember is handing my husband our sonand in asoft monotone voice i said"here take him". I walked robotically to the kitchen , poured ahuge glass of vodka, ppoured some Niquil, and took about a dozen ativan i dont think i cared very much about anything at that point. I don,t remember to much more except the county police showed up at my door the next day. Apparently in my stupper i managed to call my doctors office crying for help.iwas hospitilized soon after.
Location: Minnesota, just moved from California where I lived my whole life.
Posts: 447
Re: wanting to smile again
Welcome.
I haven't been here that long myself, but the group here has helped me so much. It is amazing how theraputic it is to read other people's stories, and realize you are not alone. I'm glad you're here.
Please feel free to post and vent and ask questions whenever you need to.
I haven't been here that long myself, but the group here has helped me so much. It is amazing how theraputic it is to read other people's stories, and realize you are not alone. I'm glad you're here.
Please feel free to post and vent and ask questions whenever you need to.
-H
Hi ! - H From Gee Gee
THANKS !
After reading your post on Wellbutrin, where I had put my two cents worth in, I decided to join in on this post.
This is where I need to be, I have just been putting it off. I don't know why,
I was diagnosed as having Bi-Polar illness, in 1985.
Yep, still here, it doesn't go away. I am just like a ' Yo Yo '. But, I have been a LOT better in the past few years. I have a GREAT P Doctor, and to me,
this is sooo very important.
I still have to take a lot of medicine, which I think it sooo very important too !
Also, our four kids are grown and gone, maybe that could be part of this...,
LESS STRESS !! lol.
Please feel free to ask any questions.
Thanks again, to YOU , - H ,
for making me see the light, and not only be able to receive the help I need right now, but perhaps help someone else in the process.
Gee Gee
PS. After reading back over this, I can see the depression in my mood today.
Location: Minnesota, just moved from California where I lived my whole life.
Posts: 447
Re: wanting to smile again
Thanks Gee Gee,
Sometimes I feel like I'm on here too much. It feels good to know that I've made a positive difference. I only wish I had found this site a LONG time ago!! I'm sure once I get myself stabilized and feeling up to doing more of the things I used to, I wont need it so often. I have always had my own friends and family as a support system. But of course they don't really "get-it" the same way. If you have read any of my other posts, My life has been kind of turned upside down in the past few months. I'm still trying to sort it all out. And you're right. Just reading your own words helps you see where you are, and that is hard in itself sometimes.
Just so YOU know, you have made a difference to me, too. Cause all of a sudden I feel kind of silly not wanting to post my name on here. I have been so paranoid, I don't know why......
Ok, so offically: Hi everybody, My name is Heather
yeah! I did it!!
OK, now I'm off for the night. Take care everybody. Talk to you soon!!
I just missed a hospitalzation myself. I know exactly how you feel. Staying up half the night is not something I can do and stay sane. I admire you for attempting it. This is a tough disease.
You come here anytime you need to vent, cry, laugh or just need a {{{{{{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}}}}}}}.
just want to say thanks for the support .. ihave much more to say things have been off and on and i had been out of treatment for almost 6 mos but i'm seeing a therapist now and on meds again . i hope something changes ..i find it so dificult being at home alone with the kids .. i can't afford to put them in day care and only one is old enough for pre-school. Again i would love to hear from any one ...maybe we can share support
Location: Minnesota, just moved from California where I lived my whole life.
Posts: 447
Re: wanting to smile again
Hey Mac,
Can I call you that? We aren't allowed to contact each other outside this website, to my knowlege. But go ahead and talk about whatever you want. I am at home, too. I'm suffering from a chronic pain condition, so my heating pad and I are inseparable right now. ( I have endometreosis) And, also, my five year old is home sick with a cold, so she is napping, and I'm just hanging out. The whole point is for other people to be able to follow our conversation if they want, and they can learn from us, or just not feel so alone, or whatever. Chances are, they won't want to sit and read it all, so just feel free. What's up?
Polarized is right tell everything, support is a beautiful thing. if you want to smile again, do it. It's just that simple (and somewhat hard simultaneously). But never give up. Fight like hell for what you want in life.
Polarized: I'm sorry to hear you aren't feeling well. Is it just me or does Bipolarism have some sadistic need to be acompanied but other illness. It seems like everyone on this board has a duality. I have high blood pressure and hypothryoidism and chronic fatigue syndrome for the better part (or would that be the worst part?) of 2003. Honestly BP is quite enough thank you.
