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Old 07-05-2005, 11:17 AM   #1
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My weekend.....

This weekend just made me believe even more that I am bipolar. While I don't have the severe manic episodes that some people have, there was definitely something going on. And all the time this happening, it was like all I could do was watch. I had no control over my feelings, and little control over my words. Especially when I was in the irritable stages. But, I kept thinking that I needed to pay attention and try to be aware of what I was doing/feeling, and remember it all. That way after it seemed to be over I could review what happened. Sounds crazy doesnít it. Let me know what you think.
On Saturday morning I was angry. Just annoyed and irritated at anything and everything. Then, in the afternoon I was bummed. It was just a general blue feeling, with intermittent spurts of anger at various things. Then I took a long nap, and just bummed around the rest of the afternoon. Then that night I went to the neighborís house and felt pretty okay. Not really happy, but okay.
So Sunday, I woke up irritable again. I was just annoyed and mad at the world in general. Then mid-morning/afternoon I felt guilty. I felt like everyone was mad at me and that I was doing everything wrong. I had a burst of energy at the same time, and got lots of housework done. Then Sunday night, I was back to being irritable. But, I was happy at the same time. It was weird. I was in a good mood, but quick to be upset/angered.
Monday morning I was depressed when I got up. I didnít want to go out and be social with the family; I just wanted to stay home all day long. At the same time I was very annoyed with my best friend, and had some major anxiety going on. Then, when we got to the 4th of July party, I was happy again. My mood was pretty good and I was having a decent time. Then, on the way home I was suddenly sleepy and the guilt feelings were coming back. I get in this mood where all I can do is apologize to my husband. I start feeling guilty for feeling sick (mentally & physically) all the time, and I just say Iím sorry over and over to him. And, I keep asking him whatís wrong and if he is okay and if he is mad at meÖ you get the idea. So then, last night as Iím trying to go to sleep, I become overwhelmingly depressed over my body. I start crying and thinking; ďI hate this bodyĒ. I am obese and have been having troubles getting the motivation / energy for exercise and eating healthy. Then I apologized to my husband again for being such a nuisance all the time and costing us so much money with doctorís bills and stuff and for not trying harder to lose weight. And of course, apologizing for not being the perfect & beautiful wife he deserves. Then after that I had a very hard time sleeping. My mind was racing with all the thoughts of what I was doing wrong and what I should be doing. Then it went to worry that no one believes me that something is wrong and maybe Iím just being stupid and making it up in my head. Eventually, I drifted off and donít remember much of anything else.
So what do yíall think? I think that is a pretty good example of some very definite episodes ranging from hypomania to depression, donít you? Or, is this explosion of moods (which happens to me a lot of the time) normal?
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Old 07-06-2005, 08:29 AM   #2
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Re: My weekend.....

bump up please...

Anyone have any advise / ideas? Am I imagining that this is too much or abnormal?
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Old 07-06-2005, 08:49 AM   #3
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Re: My weekend.....

I don't know... the mood swings are so quick, and not nearly severe enough to be called bipolar disorder. I would say that you might be cyclothymic, but I'd definitely get another psychiatric evaluation, because you do have some sort of mood disorder, even if it might not be as pronounced as BD. God bless!
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Old 07-07-2005, 07:13 AM   #4
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Re: My weekend.....

cyclothymia is still considered as within the bipolar spectrum. Some even call it bipola II rapid cycling.
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Old 07-07-2005, 07:33 AM   #5
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Re: My weekend.....

Quote:
Originally Posted by reesie
cyclothymia is still considered as within the bipolar spectrum. Some even call it bipola II rapid cycling.
Thanks for the info reesie! I was wondering where you were. Hadn't seen ya in a few days. Are you doing okay?
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Old 07-07-2005, 07:45 AM   #6
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Re: My weekend.....

Yeah I'm fine. I went out of town for the weekend to be a bridesmaid for a college friend's wedding. The whole weekend turned into a college reunion party cause the whole gang was there! Sunday was my last day there where I broke/sprained my foot because I, idiot as I am, jumped over a flower arrangement at Seaworld. I did not stick the landing. I really think it is just sprained though. I drove 300 miles home with a hurt foot (my right btw), then gave up 4th of July plans to lay on the couch and ice it (but I got to watch the Monk marathon!!) Tuesday morning I woke up to a very swollen foot and went to urgent care where I got x-rays and codeine. I had to skip work so I could get the swelling down. Then Wednesday I got sick (migraines, vomiting, low grade fever) from the codeine. I couldn't even keep down a bottle of water. But that cleared up by evening. I've basically been asleep for 2 days. Now I am back at work. I'm suprised I'm not in worse shape than I am, I skipped my meds all weekend because we were up and out all hours of the day (and night) and I just forgot to take them. But that was a good thing I guess, I wouldn't have been any fun if I was asleep plus we were drinking.
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Old 07-07-2005, 08:47 AM   #7
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Re: My weekend.....

Quote:
Originally Posted by reesie
Yeah I'm fine. I went out of town for the weekend to be a bridesmaid for a college friend's wedding. The whole weekend turned into a college reunion party cause the whole gang was there! Sunday was my last day there where I broke/sprained my foot because I, idiot as I am, jumped over a flower arrangement at Seaworld. I did not stick the landing. I really think it is just sprained though. I drove 300 miles home with a hurt foot (my right btw), then gave up 4th of July plans to lay on the couch and ice it (but I got to watch the Monk marathon!!) Tuesday morning I woke up to a very swollen foot and went to urgent care where I got x-rays and codeine. I had to skip work so I could get the swelling down. Then Wednesday I got sick (migraines, vomiting, low grade fever) from the codeine. I couldn't even keep down a bottle of water. But that cleared up by evening. I've basically been asleep for 2 days. Now I am back at work. I'm suprised I'm not in worse shape than I am, I skipped my meds all weekend because we were up and out all hours of the day (and night) and I just forgot to take them. But that was a good thing I guess, I wouldn't have been any fun if I was asleep plus we were drinking.
haha sounds like you had an eventful and fun weekend... even if it was a little painful.
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