Sign Up Today!

terrienne · 07-05-2005, 07:52 PM

Hello to ALL,

Just wondering...............,

I have seen people here ask a lot of questions about being Manic, and also
some people seem to be confused by this.

I hear about rapid cycling and etc., but I mean, how do you
describe a ' full blown Manic episode ? '

Or, have you seen someone else have one ?

I would like for someone to shed some light on this...,

THANKS,
Gee Gee

singsong · 07-06-2005, 12:21 AM

THE GOOD SIDE:

Crystal, keen awareness

THE BAD SIDE:

Irritability, paranoia, impatience, confusion, racing-yet bored, crying-laughing

...in a real tiny nutshell!

GatsbyLuvr1920 · 07-06-2005, 08:44 AM

A "full-blown" manic episode, experienced by those who have bipolar I rather than bipolar II, has this main distinction from hypomania: there can be psychotic features present. The person will have delusions and/or hallucinations. The delusions are almost always of a grandiose origin, such as "I can fly," "The President's in love with me, and we're getting married," or "I invented calculus," even if the person's currently failing math class. At this stage, the mania actually resembles schizophrenia on many counts because the person can have hallucinations of people following them or things crawling on their extremities. Also, the symptoms become more pronounced than in hypomania. For example, rapid speech and racing thoughts are common symptoms of mania, but in a bipolar I diagnosis, the person's speech may become so garbled that it's impossible to understand what they're saying because they're talking soooo fast. Also, I've heard one person describe their mind as if they were on a "merry-go-round": their head was constantly spinning with ideas that they couldn't keep track of them. The inability to sleep more than four or five hours can turn into the person not sleeping for three straight days. Also, in full-blown mania, the person is much more likely to become physically violent, throwing things and abusing people. Usually, the violence is what puts people in the hospital- after they're arrested, it's straight to the psych ward. Bipolar I mania is much more severe, and shows the negative sides of mania much more than hypomania. In hypomania, a person feels euphoric, on top of the world, has a sharper mind, and feels like they can do anything. Who wouldn't want to feel like this? (Another reason why people stop their meds- so they can experience these feelings.) However, in those with bipolar I, they'll eventually become ravingly psychotic, and need immediate treatment. Hope this helped, Gee Gee, and if you have any more questions, just let me know!
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

polarized13 · 07-06-2005, 08:54 AM

Hi Gee Gee!

Wow, you are just full of good topics aren't you? Ok, gimme a minute here....

I'd say for me being on a manic high is like being really wasted on some kind of drug. Where you just lose your sense of judgement and reality, and get lost in this euphoria that becomes a little fanstasy world. That's one kind of mania. ~

Then there's the mixed kind where you are somewhat aware that you're confused about what's going on, and you just can't seem to figure stuff out, and you feel irritated, and frustrated, and your thoughts seem like thieir split, and you can't get a real sense of anything.

Those are the times I've had optical halllucinations, and can't focus on doing any kind of task to completion. It's debilitating and frightening. Thank God that kind of episode has only happened a couple of times, but it was the worst thing I have ever experienced. I literally felt like I was losing my mind.

I've also experienced episodes where I just felt angry and agitated by anything and everything. Like I was about to explode any moment ~ and if I wasn't allowed to be by myself I would just go off.

Anyway, I have learned to manage my imbalance for the most part, it's much, much easier with a mood stablizer, and right now all I'm on is an anti-depressant. That makes it a real challenge to stay sane some days. But I've learned how to recognise when I'm becomming manic, and learned how to calm myself down, and listen to soft music instead of loud rock when I feel like that ~ I fight my mania now, instead of letting it pull me in, because once you have gone so far, you just have to ride it out, and it always takes you to the same place ~ depression. And we all know how bad that feels...

~~heather~~

terrienne · 07-06-2005, 05:27 PM

Hey ! Heather......................., I see *****'s

Thanks for your reply ! I will answer ASAP !

Just wondering................, how did I get these STARS ?
Never had these before..,

Hope you are doing good,

Take Care...,
Gee Gee

terrienne · 07-06-2005, 07:15 PM

Hello ! GatsbyLuvr,

What a great description of MANIA !!! I almost thought I was there...,lol.

I had my first ' manic episode ', in 1985, as my grown Kids say...,
' back in the old days ! ' (I just pretend I don't hear them !)
So, anyway this has brought a lot of this back to me, since I have been there, and done THAT !

It never ceases to amaze me that anyone who is Bipolar would stop taking
their meds., and take this kind of risk ! What do you think ?

I don't know though, I sometimes get this feeling of wishing I could just...,
' walk on that edge ', for just one day.

' No, No, I don't want to run the risk of hitting rock bottom..

I am in hopes that I will be around for a while longer !

Thanks a Lot for Your reply..., come back ANYTIME !

Take Care...,
Gee Gee

Ruth6:11 · 07-06-2005, 07:45 PM

In one of my manic episodes I believed that I was giving a secret deposition - and that my boombox was transmitting my testimony into the courtroom.

In another I became obsessed by the song 'I can't fight this feeling anymore' and kept candles lit in my windows 24/7.
I also "knew" that whenever I heard the song "I want to know where Love is" it meant that this particular guy was looking for me.

Many of my manias had major spiritual/religious themes. I saw God in a raindrop. Literally.

In my last mania I ran into a guy I had worked with years before, he knew something was wrong and took me to his place. Where I proceeded to talk off all my clothes and get into his bathtub. He somehow managed to get enough information out of me to get me to my parents - they took me to my doctor who for once finally SAW me manic and got me into the hospital pronto.

For someone who was VERY self-consious and inhibited, all this stuff was just plain insurance that I will take my meds faithfully till the day I die rather than do stuff like this!

GatsbyLuvr1920 · 07-06-2005, 08:15 PM

Thanks, Gee Gee! Even though I don't have bipolar disorder, I've done a lot of research on it so I wouldn't just use stereotypical generalizations. I agree that it is stupid for people to stop their meds, but I can also see why they'd want to. Even though I've never experienced hypomania, I can imagine it is pretty great in some aspects. After all, who wouldn't want to be happy, smarter, and feel like they can do anything? It might be different if I actually had it, but I don't think I could ever stop my meds just because I'm such a stickler for the rules and I'd be afraid of what would happen. Also, Ruth, it's not that uncommon for mania to take on a strongly religious sense. From your screen name, I'm guessing you're religious anyway, but many people when manic, even if they're not normally religious, suddenly become devout. Good luck and God bless!
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

terrienne · 07-07-2005, 06:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ruth6:11

In one of my manic episodes I believed that I was giving a secret deposition - and that my boombox was transmitting my testimony into the courtroom.

In another I became obsessed by the song 'I can't fight this feeling anymore' and kept candles lit in my windows 24/7.
I also "knew" that whenever I heard the song "I want to know where Love is" it meant that this particular guy was looking for me.

Many of my manias had major spiritual/religious themes. I saw God in a raindrop. Literally.

In my last mania I ran into a guy I had worked with years before, he knew something was wrong and took me to his place. Where I proceeded to talk off all my clothes and get into his bathtub. He somehow managed to get enough information out of me to get me to my parents - they took me to my doctor who for once finally SAW me manic and got me into the hospital pronto.

For someone who was VERY self-consious and inhibited, all this stuff was just plain insurance that I will take my meds faithfully till the day I die rather than do stuff like this!

From GeeGee, Hi ! Ruth,
WOW ! What a story ! I suppose I will get mine on here before this is over..,
and I have similar stories to tell.

Thanks so much for sharing your story..., more later....,
GeeGee

polarized13 · 07-07-2005, 07:48 AM

Gee Gee,

The five stars mean that 'the group' has rated it as an excellent and very helpful thread ~ THATS GREAT!!!!!

Congratulations!!!

~ In response to your comment about how and why anyone would take the risk of going off their meds, well.......I think I have a pretty good reason, wanting another child. I did consider giving up after my miscarriage, and figured it wasn't worth it. But I still want another child so badly, and being a Mom is the only thing I have ever wanted to do.

It is a big risk, it does make things harder for me and my family, but I think it's worth it. I'm sure there are lots of times when people have other illnesses besides bipolar, that their doctors reccommend they stop taking something for a period of time. Many of us struggle even while we take our prescribed meds. I suffer primarily from depression, but I can become manic if I'm not careful and watch my triggers.

I know my doctors trust me that I'm capable of handling it, we have spent many months discussing my condition, and they know I have worked hard to understand my illness, and learn to cope with the symptoms, and keep things from getting out of control. I have people close to me who will tell me in a hot second if they see me start to lose it. I have promised my husband if that happens, I will go back on my mood stabilizer and give up on having a baby....

In a way, if I can continue to live my life the way I choose even with bipolar, instead of letting it dictate that my life has to be diminished because of my illness, I feel like I am overcoming it somehow, and perservering.

What do you think?

~~heather~~

reesie · 07-07-2005, 08:08 AM

Well, I've only been hypomanic. We don't know if I could have full blown mania because I was diagnosed during my first hypomanic episode and put on meds pronto so my mania stopped. But my mania was getting worse by the day so who knows?

For me hypomania means staying up all night on the internet shopping or wandering through the house with a hammer. I start decorating and everything must be designed and built by me. I also start inventing gourmet recipes. cooking them, and throwing them away. I do yardwork at 2am, shop at walmart at 2am talking to myself and dancing in the aisles. The world is my private joke and it's very funny. I'm not sure if I withdraw from people or if they just run away from me. I talk about all my ideas at about 200 words a minute. (99 words a minute is normal for me, really I'm serious). I start writing unintelligible emails to friends I haven't heard from in a while.

Last year I decided grass was evil and started digging holes in my backyard to get rid of it.

I become irritable and once broke down into rant mode at supertarget and was escorted out.

I get so hypersexual I can't see straight.

Now that I think about it, I've been depressed for so long, I'd really like mania to come back

-reesie

Catie · 07-07-2005, 08:47 AM

Since I'm BPII, I don't get full-blown mania, just hypomania. For that, I'm very thankful.

My hypomania has two faces. One is giddy and hyperactive. It's a great feeling--during it, I have amazing clarity--all the secrets of the universe seem open to me, and they race by with such speed that it's blinding. It's hard to explain, but there's a sensousness to everything--it all seems so alive and velvety, and I just want to grab it. When I'm like this I start incredibly ambitious projects (and if I don't finish them in hypomania, I then feel like an idiot when I come down and realize there's no way I can finish it, which makes me feel even lower). I also shop a lot when I'm like this.

The other side to my hypomania is not so pretty. I get irritable for no reason, and seem to stay that way for very long periods of time. But the worst part is the unexpected rage--out of nowhere, I get rage like I want to hit somebody or something, scream my lungs out and curse. I feel overcome with negative energy, and it seems to be pouring into my body from some outside source. It scares the crap out of me. After several of these episodes of increasing frequency, I was scared enough to get treatment.

terrienne · 07-07-2005, 11:18 AM

HEY ! REESIE !!!! I was about to do a post.........,

' REEEEEEEESIE, WHERE ARE YOU ??????????? '

It's great to hear from you. I was beginning to wonder..., I hope you are
doing good.
I missed Ya !

WOW ! Your description of your hypomania sounds like my main Manic
episode (in 85') !!!

You know, back in the 80's (in the old days, my Kids say), my diagnosis
was ' Manic Depression ' ! I was in the hospital for at least two weeks !
(I was given Haldol !) So, I was totally out of IT for a long time, after that !

I never paid much attention to Bipolar, and Bipolar 1 and 2 and all of that,
untill recently.
I have had hyper times..., and as you know, ' Depression ', is a bummer.
I have been in the hospital only two times for depression, since that time.
I guess I have Bipolar 2, on the depressed side...,?????????

I truly do know what you mean about what you said about being depressed
for so long, you wish the mania would come back !

EEK is RIGHT !
I have been so depressed for so long, and I can't tell how much is mental,
and how much is this **** Virus I have that's been going on for so long.

I have often wished I could walk on that edge, just for a day. But,
it is much too scary.

Girl, I got up this morning at 5:00am. I couldn't believe it ! Then, I turned on
the TV., so I could be abreast of the weather..., YEP ! Dennis is headed
straight for us !................,
And, then I found out all of this horrific happenings in London.
I came in here and replied to a couple of folks, went back to bed,
and I just got back up a little while ago ! Sorry for the whinning...,
* * **
Please let me hear from you, and tell me...., ' How did I get these Stars ? ' *
What did I do to deserve these ? * ** * *

You Take Care...,
I hope you had a great weekend, and Hope you have a great day !
Gee Gee

polarized13 · 07-07-2005, 11:22 AM

Gee Gee!!

I answered you about your stars, and I said a bunch of other stuff ~ you must have missed it!!! Go back and read my second post at the end of page two, oK?

~~heather~~

reesie · 07-07-2005, 11:45 AM

Hey Gee Gee,

I am continually amazed at the similarities between us. You're not Black are you?
I half expected a "Reesie Where are you?" thread when I got on this morning. I'm been accessing the internet but wasn't up to posting. Check out my post in Mikeywifey's "My weekend" thread for the haps with my weekend and absence from boards. I'm sure you all will easily believe that only I (well maybe a few others) could get into such a mess.

terrienne · 07-07-2005, 11:57 AM

Hey ! Heather, WOW ! So, that is what the stars are about !!!

I feel honored, to say the least ! THANKS GUYS !

Sorry about just now getting back. I am having a bad day, to say the least,
one of those where I can't seem to stay out of bed.
I am so Zapped ! It's hard to figure out if it's depression, or this ___,___
virus I have, that is messing with my immune system..,

I got up early and turned on the TV., to check on this
weather situation. I guess you see that Hurricane Dennis is headed for the
Gulf Coast ! So, we could be in a world of hurt...,

THEN, I saw the News about the Terror in London. Ohhh, this is just
awful....,
I realized I can't do anything about either of these issues, so I went back
to bed. (And, I am headed that way again soon !)

Heather, in answer to your question.........., It sounds like you are doing good, and staying in touch with your Doctor, and you have a GHubby to
be your Buddy through all of this, to look for triggers.
And, it sounds to me like you have all of your ducks in a row !
I say, " GO FOR IT, GIRL FRIEND ! "

I hope I didn't come on too strong about people going off their meds.,
cuz we know everybody is different.

In your case, it is a special one, and you are close to your Doc and you
have your family to support you. Not many folks can say this. Agree ?

I wish only the BEST for you, because you deserve all that your life has
to offer, and I think you are a wonderful, knowledgable, person.
And, you have a lot of insight to be in control of your own life !

You Take Care of Yourself, and please keep in touch...,

Thinking of You..,
Gee Gee

polarized13 · 07-07-2005, 01:46 PM

Thanks Gee Gee,

I always appreciate your support. I'm sorry about the hurricaine you guys have coming your way, that must be really tough to have to worry about those all the time, of course here, you have thunder-storms and tornadoes, and back home there's earthquakes and wild-fires, so I guess there's always some form of mother-nature to watch out for. That is really sad about London, I'm just sick about the whole thing. I hope you're feeling better soon.

take care,

~~heather~~

polarized13 · 07-07-2005, 01:53 PM

ps. Reesie was sneaky and put another post in while you were'nt looking, not that it's any of my business, or I would care one way or another, but I have wondered the same thing, so...are you?