My therapist and psychiatrist have confused me at times, but then again I just might be just worrying too much regarding if I have bipolar disorder or bp with add, or just a dreadful depression. My name is Damon, and Im new here
I found this bp board after looking at some of the other boards for sexual questions that I had. Im 31 and have been currently seeing my therapist & psychiatrist, (whom both work in the same office and collaborate often), for the past 2 to 3 years now. I've taken those questionnaire forms on bp and add before with my therapist, and I clearly seen that I have the symptoms of bp. I also did one on add as well, and my therapist told me that I was on the "borderline" for it.
I'm being sarcastic because I don't know what I have to be honest, whether its just bipolar or a combo of add & bipolar. I know I should see my therapist, but lately she hasn't returned my calls. I admit Im one that doesn't like seeing a therapist or psych on a weekly basis. It's a bad habit of mine to go maybe every other couple of weeks, or just once a month.
Stubbornness gets the worst of me.
My current meds are lexapro 10mg, once daily and trileptal 150 mg, one full pill at nite, and one half pill with the lexapro when I get up. Dizziness is the most negative side effect that I have experienced. My fiance and her daughter have joined a YMCA a couple of months back, and Im getting back on a workout routine for my own health and benefit. It really makes me feel good, and gets the stress and hatred out of my system, however at work or in public I often yearn for just being alone working out in that gym to release some mre stress and anger out. I know I can't lose self control and lose my job depending on my "moody shifts" as I like to call them.
I apologize for drifting off my point of this thread, but I like to ramble at times
Yes, I even spook myself, don't know what Im feeling or whats going to come out of my mouth. I know Im not alone with that. Anyways, I distinctly remember one session I had with my psychiatrist that I directly asked her what was wrong with me. A straight answer never came in my head. All I heard was that she was cheerful and being giddy with me telling me that I have a mixture of problems, and that she doesn't like to "label" anyone with he/she as bipolar, add, depressed, etc. That really ****** me off but I kept my cool.
They both had recommended me to see a psychologist, from which I did go and did some lenghty tests to say the least. WHEW
I performed those tests on about 3 hours of sleep, but the psychologist told me that my sleep deprivation may have made a little difference on my comprehensive, cognitive, and other parts of the tests of which I cannot remember. To sum it up, his evaluation basically stated that I had schizoid traits and had major depression. I still believe to this day that I am bipolar but why oh why cannot I get a straight answer on this matter. I f#$@#ng feel like I'm being played with and just used as a fricking guinea pig so to speak.
I am sure Im not alone though. I hope to gain some friends on this post and am eager to read some responses to this. Has anything like this happened to anyone on this board or anything similar?