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Old 02-11-2006, 02:04 AM   #1
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LOWnly~Me! HB User
Angry Please HELP me PLEASE

Dear All,
I know all of you are not familiar with me, as I am not with all of you. However we are all part of this beautiful site of help, chat, experiences, issues, needs etc. I would like as many paople as possible to give my BPD ignorant husband some insight into my illness. I have OCD and PTSS, panic attacks and of course BPD. He assumes because I am intelligent and seemingly manage to contain my most horribilist, hurtful, darkest, frightening parts of me, to the confinements of my safety, security of home (where i hide away) that somehow i am normal. I am admittidly a strong person so weakness is not allowed, I am coherrent, intelligent, positive so i cant be confused, weak, scared or negative. My behaviour is suspicious he says, meaning that I am a plain liar, when im ill i am not doing things because im ill but because i am premeditated, plotting, disrespectful and a shame to this family. Apparantly he doesnt care anymore because its affecting him! My manic stages are just excuses he says, my low moods lazyness. He doesnt see the attraction of meeting like minded people, he sees it as adultery??? Sex is the last thing in this messed up mind. Please everyone who reads this address to mr lownley me, give him some experiences, some insight something just something please i beg you. I am diagnosed with schizoid tendencies too, he just thinks i am evil. Sorry, this is my last hope. Thank you all.
God Bless
xxxxx

Last edited by LOWnley~Me!; 02-11-2006 at 02:18 AM.

 
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Old 02-11-2006, 06:09 AM   #2
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Ruth6:11 HB UserRuth6:11 HB User
Re: Please HELP me PLEASE

Do you really think he will listen to us?
I also am a very high functioning Bipolar - I work, have a really good marriage, a supportive family and Very excellent results with Lithium alone.

But. Underneath my wonderful high functioning exterior there is still an over the top manic, catatonic depressive, mentally ill person who has one and only one reason for being a fairly balanced member of society.
Meds.

If after 20 years of stability I went off my meds I would revert back within 6 months to cycling high to low like I did before.

What people like your husband don't know, or choose not to understand, if that our BEHAVIOR is a symptom of the disorder. The disorder is in our brains instead of our pancreas and therefore our symptoms are BEHAVIORAL or attached to our MOODS.

Instead of our blood sugar rising as a diabetic's would, we have highs and lows.
Nothing to do with our intellect or "choices".
Can a diabetic control their blood sugar by just "snapping out of it"?

I am wondering if there is more to your husband's unhappiness... Certainly he's read something about Bipolar Disorder by now that explains the chemical imbalance?
It's almost like he's singling your disorder out to pin ALL of the bad things on.
It ALWAYS takes two.

And luckily there are LOTS more than two here for support. I'm just not sure that anything we say is going to change his behavior (which by the way is not caused by being bipolar so I wonder where its coming from....)
Ruth

Last edited by Ruth6:11; 02-11-2006 at 06:10 AM.

 
Old 02-11-2006, 06:19 AM   #3
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billiegail HB User
Re: Please HELP me PLEASE

I am a lot like you LOWnleyMe. My home is my safe haven. I could have written what you said, leaving out the non-understanding husband and schizoid tendencies. I would advise to take him to see your doctor. How can he argue with a person that DX's bp? All I can say to your husband is BP is real and the way your wife acts is much like that of my BP. I will keep you both in my prayerss.
__________________
every person that I have met in my life has brought with them a lesson. I may not have enjoyed the lesson learned, but I have always enjoyed attending class.

 
Old 02-11-2006, 06:54 AM   #4
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Posts: 655
barbaric_yawp HB User
Re: Please HELP me PLEASE

Here is the deal: he needs counseling ASAP so he can understand the disease and how it affects you. This may help him stop blaming you for your ups and downs. He needs to know that bp ROBS us of normal emotions. He cannot expect you to control the disease, at this point it controls you. Just as RUth said: our BEHAVIOR is a symptom of the disorder...

It sounds like your meds are not working...what are you on? maybe you should speak to a doc about your current situation.

B.Y.

 
Old 02-15-2006, 03:45 AM   #5
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LOWnly~Me! HB User
Talking Re: Please HELP me PLEASE


Hi All
We are going to the book shop at the weekend and are going to select a couple of good books about living/loving someone with BP and all the rest!!!!! Sorry to have come across as desperate and pathetic. I just get to the stage where my pride goes out the window, dignity whats that?! . But then again is that not why we are here?????? To help, listen, talk etc.
How are you hun? Little one any better? Missed chattin with you, speak soon xxnonixx !!!!!!!!!!

 
Old 02-15-2006, 08:56 AM   #6
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barbaric_yawp HB User
Re: Please HELP me PLEASE

Not pathetic at all, just seeking help, just like me and everyone else!

B.Y

 
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