not sure if its bipolar - Bipolar Disorder Message Board

dj1412 · 03-12-2006, 04:33 PM

sorry if this kind of thread has already been posted, but my mums friend hasn't been well recently, i've known her for many years and she is the last person i would have thought to have this kind of illness. She always seemed pretty rational but recently,things are different, she bought a £400 fountain (she lives in a second floor flat), she got fired for not going to work and bought a shop and doesn't know what to do. she spent about 2 weeks in bed not eating, she brought the takings home from her shop on the 1st day open and realized she didn't know what to do (did the banking everyday at work) so she went to bed for 2 days.

Apparantly she has been doing these kind of things for years but has always appeared to hide them pretty well until recently and i was wondering if perhaps symptoms can get worse the older you get, she has never seen a doctor for long enough for a diagnosis to be made. She takes antidepressants off her own back, but i don't think this will help with her manic episodes (not that i have a clue, 1st night looking). My mums really worried, she doesnt have anyone close and we live a bit away, she only found out as a concerned collegue phoned, her parents passed away in her teen. We phone her everyday but sometimes she doesnt answer.

Sorry to blather on, but we don't know what to do. We don't want to frighten her by saying you have this, but just wondered if a)it gets worse with age and b)how we can her to approach this?

again, sorry to go on!
thank you!

cmartin · 03-12-2006, 09:35 PM

This definatley sounds like what I know bipolar disorder to me it may not be getting worse , just harder for her to hide, it's hard to hide loosing your job. Anyway, bipolar disorder is often misdiagnosed as depression and people are often given antidepressants. The reason for this is during the manic phase the person is very happy and they do not seek help during this time. I was actually the one that figured out that my husband was suffering from bipolar disorder. It was scary to confront him since he was very angry and agressive at times (throwing things, hitting holes in walls, etc.)
I found some good articles describing bipolar disorder and highlighted things that were like him, one article had a quiz, which also helped. One morning when he was more on the depressed side I had him read it. He actually got happy to see there was a reason for him doing these impulsive things and for him feeling terrible at other times. Untreated bipolar disorde can get worse or even end up deadly due to wreckless driving, or other wreckless behaviors because in the manic phase these people think they are unstoppable or immortal. I would try either how I told my husband what I saw or get her family to have her evaluated in a mental hospital if she is unwilling. They usually will put someone in for a 72 hour observation if they like it or not. good luck...hang in there. She needs someone like you and your mother

dj1412 · 03-13-2006, 05:31 PM

thanks for your help, i was expecting to come on and people to tell me to mind my own business.

i showed my mum your advice and all i got on symptoms, the most helpful from the 'newbies' post on this site i might add. it made her quite sad as i think she agrees that this could be it, mum phoned her after i left and shes in bed again! she has put all her money in to a shop and opened it 2 days out of the 6 it should be. all her immediate family are dead and her aunts and other family are concerned with their own, theyve had at least 2 years of this and are pretty ****ed (of the sort yourself out mentallity)

Mum doesn't know who to phone, the doctor is crap, stiff upper lip,next! and all that, we're not related, family dealing with their kids being in hospital, (my mums friend is now 40+).

Were feeling pretty lost right now, how do we get her help when shes not hurting herself (bar the not eating, which she hides by making food and saying she'll eat it later, mum stays but who else will).

i dont think my mum ever thought B was mad (although some of her behavour has been pretty out there!) but when i told her what i thought, that shes really ill, shes pretty blown away, 'lets put it down to eccentric behavour, shes just impulsive, shes daft, who can keep up with her' which is what everyone else thinks, now mums frightened and i guess now wants me to tell her how to help.

blathering again, i know, i don't expect answers i guess, its just hard watching 2 people suffering and not knowing what to do.

your advice was great and i will keep look for articles to give her and thanx for being so friendly!