Manic so strong your sick to your stomach
I cycle quick and usually my episodes are not the type most feel in severity. When I am Manic I have a hard time sleeping and I buy to much, eat to much and just well do everything to much. when I am depressed I get kind of discouraged, but nothing too bad, usually its annoying at most.
My Doc just lowered me a bit on the Lithium with a new pill, I went from 1200 down to 1050. I was on 900 for the longest time, but I started to swing a bit so he brought me to 1200, but I found it made me sleepy, so we went down to 1050.
All was well for about a week, when I noticed I was a bit manic as usual but went about my day. Then that night it hit, and extreemly good mood just swallowed me whole. I might have slept 2 hrs. But I felt great, except it felt so good it made me sick to my stomach in a butterfly kind of way. I was going to call my doctor, but, I felt so good I wanted to milk it for a few days and enjoy it. And it did last, for four wonderful Days which is odd for me.
It had its cost though, I ended up buying a truck we didn't need, and spending money we didn't have. Got to control that.
Then I plunged the other way and became really sad, but I could still function, but for the first time, putting my foot in front of the other just seemed like too much work. I started to feel I failed my son, my wife, my job, and most of all myself. Like some broken toy prancing through life trying to pretend all was well. The world turned gray, I became obsessed with the money I spent, hating myself for doing it, but helpless to change it.
But that past, and I am feeling the stirrings of those butterflies again and I know the good mood's comming. I wonder if its going to be the same or even better, I feel like a mood junky.
Each night I am tempted to go back up to 1200, each night I hold off for just one more day.
, Can you become addicted to your mood LOL. I am cyclomatic, so I don't have dangerous manics, but they do seem to be doubling in stength, so far I am rulling it. Have any of you other Cyclomantic's have times when your mood gets very strong? more than usual?