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Old 04-12-2006, 11:27 PM   #1
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Posts: 39
Sydney777 HB User
Unhappy Eye Dilation?

Ok, Im just learning that I am out of control in a Bipolar mania or whatever, and I will be going to hospital tomorrow and im not that knowledgable about bipolar.
I had quuite an episode earlier and I have had 2 docs tell me I might have BP, well Im sure I have it noe. At first I didnt think so cuz I was addicted by a doc, to major oxycodone. I came off that cd on 300mg to 500mg a day.
Im still on a huge dose of xanax and i only take that at night.
I used to tramadol to help restless legs got addicted to that and have spent the last 7 days cold turkeying that.
So tonight i had a doozy of a panic induced Im pretty sure cycle or whatever we all them. I have finally calmed down. I have every symptom of bp and have just had enough of all of this and am willing to go to er til i get a pyschiatrist appt soon.
Bad thing is this easter I have to drive with my husband 8 hours to see my kids cuz my bro and wife took my kids for the last 3 months of school til we got on our feet.
And Im scared I wont be able to function cuz this thing has taken over me.
And all I want is to be normal get a job and wait for my kids to come home when schoold over.
Well is huge pupil dilation part of bp?
When espeacially u arent on any drugs?
My symptoms are these below and Im sure its Bp but theres so many I dont know what kind.
Im gonna die all the time
Every pain which I have different reallllll ones every where.
i just know Im dying
But also I know its panic
im tired of worrying about dying every minute
I talk, so fast that i stutter and I will talk for hours sometimes and my husband cant get me to shut up.
I get on a roll
Total presseureed speech
When I get in this frenzy I loose control of thoughts and my thoughts feel choppy, IM totally not in this world, Disconnected and surreal feeling.
I feel overly energetic but in a bad way like OH MY GOD INSIDE IT FEELS LIKE IM GONNA EXPLODE AND MY BODYS SCREAMING
Pace,pace, talk freaking out
I have total inrealistic dreams of where I wanna be and how Im gonna do it.
Cant ever sleep.
Unless Im on xanax and thats starting to not work
And Im huge dose
No energy when I wake.
Totally disorganized
But it drives me nuts being messy but, I dont know how to get going on cleaning it all up.
which I eventually do.
Racing heart
pulse is always around 100
Heart palpatations, sometimes to where theres no heart beat and all is just beating outta chest
rACING THOUGHTS, CONSTANTLY
CANT REMEMBER WHY I JUST WALKED INTO ROOM
WHEN IM REAL BAD I START STUTTEREING, OH I HAVE NEVER STUTTERED IN MY LIFE (NEW SYMPTOM) STARTED 6 MONTHS AGO
and im 33
Just always feeling outta control and the im dying
Motor movements sometimes are choppy and im knocking things off counters or not talking right.
which is embarasssing
cant grab something without trying 3 times sometimes
Thats when I get bad
Usually always disconnected feeling (always)
And Im sorry if im hogging up here but Im stressed and have just calmed down and Im giving in tomorrow before i have to go see my children for easter. Im scared to go.
So Im going to Er and saying hey plz help til i get an appt.
I dont know what to do.
But the worst thing that bugs me and im not on anything is My eyeballs are usually huge and black
Is this part of Bipolar?

Plz anyone, anyone answer anything u can plz
plus my legs feel like aliens are always crawling thru my calfs.
sorry guys.
I love this board and i love ya all.
All my love,
And God Bless you.
Please respond someone quickly
Sydney
Oh and
Ps. Latley Im always yawning way to much even if Ive slept for 9 hours, Im mean yawning every 2 minutes and cant stop for hours and its driving my poor husband to yawning, haha, ya know its contagious but, I cant help it. thats a new symptom by the way.
Ok God Bless u all.
Happy Easter or whatever beleif u may have!

 
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Old 04-13-2006, 06:37 AM   #2
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Join Date: Apr 2006
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BP_Puff&Stuff HB User
Re: Eye Dilation?

Sydney, sweetheart, I am saying this with the utmost respect. Your decision to go to the hospital is absolutely the right one. The last time I had an acute manic episode, I was typing, talking the same way you are. I am not sure about the eye dialation, I never bothered to look at my eyes and see. I do think you need to be checked out. Are you going to a hospital with a psych ward or just to a PCP? Go see a psych, get yourself calmed down. I wish you the best of luck. My thoughts are with you. Get well soon.

 
Old 04-13-2006, 11:25 AM   #3
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Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 39
Sydney777 HB User
Re: Eye Dilation?

Thanks for at least answering me puff...
I know I mispelled a gazillion words last night but a know how it is when ur brain is in fast forward. Plus I think Im doing it now. So I can only go to a reg hosp er til about a week or so.
I have serequel or however u spell it and that crap knocks me out on my butt.
Took 25mg last night.
Feel like crap right now and it suxs cuz I need energy. I was given serequel for sleep awhile back and I used it and went WHOOOAHHH.
Thank god I only took 50 mg
Im thinking about just hopping back on it til I get to phyc doc or whoever but man.
One of my worst probs is low energy when I wake and all day so that kinda suxs.
I just hope I can get thru these next few days to be normal for my kids so they can be assured Moms fine and working (which) Im not so they can come home the end of school.
AGhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
I was really excited to see if someone posted here this morning. So Im sure how much You know any message to people can help.
Thank god for every one who helps everyone on this board no matter what the prob is.
God Bless you!
sydney

ps. plz forgive all spelling typos I am to lazy to go back to look and I type to fast and unfortunatley incorrectly , haha, sorry......

 
Old 04-18-2006, 11:34 AM   #4
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Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: TENNESSEE
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1CONFUZEDMOMMA HB User
Lightbulb Re: Eye Dilation?

You mentioned something about "restless legs" I thik I have that too. They hurt so bad seometimes. You were addicted to oxycotin I was hydrocodones and valiums and cocaine and ectstacy and anything that I could "self medicate" myself with. I also use to "lose myself" in the computer world stayn gup talking to people for days and playing agems

 
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