I have not been diagnosed with Bi Polar, but I have a few questions for those of you that have. From what I have read I am more likely to have Bi Polar 2.
I have had depression for years and nothing seems to work. I have been on many AD's with no luck. My Dr. and I went on a trial drug for what she thought might be ADD.
1. When I start a new AD, I am anxious, manic and feel like I'm going to crawl out of my skin. Than after about 3-4 days I feel better. My depression is gone! Than 2 weeks later the depression comes back. It's like the medicine just stops working. Adjusting the dosage higher does nothing. I have had the same results with many AD's. Does this sound familiar to anyone?
2. The medicine I was given for ADD made my concentration much better the first day. No racing thoughts and my body was more relaxed. By day 3-4 I was becoming irritable, angry and my thoughts were racing just as bad or worse. Anyone?
I have no desire to be Bi Polar, but at this point I dont know what to do. I am able to work, live, etc.., but I am miserable most of the time. There are times when I feel ok and they may last up to a week and then I can feel it coming; I mean physically feel the dpression coming. In the span of an hour I go from ok to depressed. I don't sleep well, but I dont have episodes when I can't sleep at all (mania). I am impulsive and sometimes spend money I don't have. I just get the urge to do something and I do it. Those are the only symtoms of mania I have.
If anyone has any advice or comments I would appreciate it. Also, if your experience with AD's or the ADD med was the same I would really like to know what the solution was.
Hi Although I am not Bipolar my daughter is being evaluated and from my research and info shared here it is important that a mood stabilizer be added in with the antidepressant, in fact if you have been diagnosed as Bipolar being on an antidepressant alone could trigger mania so that is something I would be concerned about.
It's funny because my daughter's pdoc seems to be treating her in much the same way since she has strong traits of Bipolar II mixed with what he sees as Borderline traits as well as Oppositional Behavior. She is presently on Zoloft 50mg and after being hospitalized was placed on Concerta 54mg since they feel that alot of her behavior is impulsive and characteristic of ADD. And alot of people here are not very happy with the use of antidepressants and Concerta if she has Bipolar so I am sure that many here are going to tell you the same. So be prepared!!
For the most part she seems depressed and irritable and unable to control some of her outbursts and behavior. She is 14 years old and for the past 4 months we have been trying to find the right diagnosis and treatment and have yet to find it.
I think that it is in your favor that you realize that you have a problem and how you are responding to the treatment. Sounds to me as if you still have to get the mania under control and an antidepressant alone will not do that.
I have to say that my daughter just started the Concerta 4 days ago and although it made her feel better at first she too started getting more irritable and upset.
You did not choose to be Bipolar however if you have been diagnosed as having it you must seek out and accept that there is treatment for it and find the proper meds that will help you maintain a normal lifestyle. Just like somebody who is diabetic needs medication to live so will you for your Bipolar.
There are others here far more qualified than I but I just wanted to welcome you and let you know that you are so much farther ahead just knowing that you have Bipolar and wanting the best treatment for it. That in itself is half the battle for there are many who have Bipolar and without treatment are living mediocre lives. Accepting the treatment and finding the right meds is essential to a good quality of life.
Keep us posted and good luck with finding the proper meds. You are your best advocate and you just keep on telling your doc what you need and don;t stop until you get it!!
First, let me just say that I'm so sorry that your emotional life has been so hard. I have been BPD my whole life and what you describe sounds pretty classic. Right down to the trouble getting a dx.
I was first diagnosed as clinically depressed at about 23, but I had severe signs of BPD since I was about seven. Even though my symptoms were debilitating, I never took meds because I had had drug problems in my teen years. Clearly, I didn't understand my illness and the doctors were no help.
Even after finally getting on an SSRI at about 33, I still was no closer to understanding my illness. My mania escalated out of control and even though I was under the care of a pdoc, they didn't see it. Even after a MAJOR episode that involved my losing everything; my job, friends, health, apartment... EVERYTHING. I went home to stay with my family. But I didn't know I was BPD, I thought I had depression.
It wasn't until almost five years later, several more breakdowns and a lot of research that I even found out I was BPD and when I told my pdoc I thought I was... she didn't believe me. She diagnosed me with borderline personality disorder. The doctors think that BPD's would never admit to their manic symptoms. But we don't admit to them WHILE we're having them. As I always tell people, "We're chemically imbalanced, not stupid."
The unfortunate thing is that it is almost impossible to be diagnosed and recieve proper treatment until the pdoc's realize you are BPD. They seem not to catch it unless there is a major crisis like a suicide attempt, even people like yourself, who seem to have had mania unmasked by an SSRI and are in treatment don't get diagnosed! And then you start to try and figure it out yourself and they tell you that if you really were BPD, you would not admit it. UGH. Sometimes I wish I did have diabetes. It would be easier.
But for whatever reason, this is our lot in this life. It is perhaps the plan that we have to figure it out ourselves and fight to get treatment that helps us be who we are capable of being.
There are other signs of BPD that are very positive. Increased creative ability, hyper sensitivity to the feelings of others, heightened intelligence and spirituality, superior reasoning abilities, insatiable thirst for knowledge, elevated self confidence and ambition... the list is just as long as the list of negatives.
All blessings are curses and all curses are blessings. Keep this in mind when trying to figure out what is going on with your brain chemestry. There is an old story that expresses it best.
A man in a small village owned a beautiful horse. The villagers said that he was truly blessed to have such a horse. The man told them that blessings are also curses.
One day, the horse ran away and the people in the town told him he was surely cursed to lose such a wonderful horse. The man replied that curses are also blessings.
A week later, the horse returned with a herd of wild horses and the villagers counted him very blessed. The man simply stated that blessings were also curses.
A few years later the man's young son was trampled by the horses and became lame from his injuries. The townspeople sent sympathy, telling the man he was surely cursed. But the man only said that curses are blessings.
Many years later an army came through and rounded up all the young men to fight in the war. The man's two oldest sons were killed in the war, but the youngest was lame and unable to join the army. The townspeople all agreed that the man was blessed. Shaking his head, the man tried to tell them again, "Curses are blessings and blessings curses."
This is the secret of making it through this life. If you see that your weaknesses are also your strengths, you will be more reticent to hate your weaknesses. You simply understand that life is long and there are many different skills needed to get through. And because you have the curses you have, you also have the blessings.
Check the thread I started called Advantages of bipolar. Maybe you'll also start to find your curses that are blessings.
Welcome. The fact that you have fund this sight gives you a boost in understanding your illness and getting the treatment that's right for you. The people on here are wise and amazing and have been through the ringer and come back. We are happy to help.
It is very important to always remember that this illness is managable. You can live a healthy, productive life with no major episodes. My hero is Ruth6:11, who has been stable for 20 years!
Hang in there. It will be hard, but you're on the right track!
Hi. I can't answer your questions exactly because the meds didn't affect me like that. However I do have bipolar and ADHD and it took me 8 years and 24 medications to get to the right combination. Just because strattera might not work for you, ritalin or adderall might. Same goes for antidepresants, antipshychotics, and mood stabilizers. You need an experienced pdoc, persistence and a lot of patience. If you keep in close contact with your doctor (when changing meds mine wanted me to call every day and report how I was feeling), be sure to be totally honest about how you are feeling and your behaviors and stay with it, you will be fine eventually.
For many people there manic phase is when they are irrattable,snapping at others,reacting to others or starting aurgements or fights that's me. My Dr. calls me Evil my friends call me a witch with a b and other names and they know that I'm getting manic. Very little things can set me off regDr. being late for appointment sitting there forever then they try to get me to see someone esle makes me even madder. They are learning though. Many times I have been able to see it myself and get to the dr. to have med increased or put in partical day. A day program at the hospital to help moniater your moods and help you use your day properly.