Should I leave my kids alone with bp husband? - Bipolar Disorder Message Board

Lelore · 07-10-2006, 06:23 PM

Hi, My husband was diagnosed with bpII about 5 months ago. Lately, he has been extremely paranoid and anxious. He can not remember anything and is somewhat delusional - he doesn't see people who aren't there or anything - but his intrepretation of events are nowhere near logical.

My husband's family are beginning to think that I am going overboard not letting him be alone with our kids. It just makes me incredibly nervous. He keeps telling me that I don't trust him and it makes me feel awful, but I'm not willing to take a risk with my kids safety or emotional well being.

Am I going overboard?

Lelore

MillaRose · 07-10-2006, 06:31 PM

I'm Bi Polar and I don't think you should leave your kids alone with someone who is paranoid and delusional. Regular situations can become very dangerous when perceptions are scrambled. I would explain that its not him you don't trust it's the illness. Two differrent things. Just like you wouldn't want to have them drive ion a car with someone who has a tendency to faint

Lelore · 07-10-2006, 07:19 PM

Thanks....it is really comforting to hear that from someone who has the illness. I know that if he were stable right now, he would feel the same way. I have tried to tell him that it's not him, but I didn't phrase it quite like you did. I will try that the next time he brings it up.

I feel much better.

MillaRose · 07-10-2006, 08:05 PM

Your very welcome. Try not to feel guilty. You are being responsible and when he's well he'll realize that.

When I look back on when i've been sick i remember everything ,but I see those frantic episodes now as a clear thinking well person and i can't beleive how confused and frantic we get. When i was acting the way you descibed your husband as being I was better off in hospital. Of course i didn't want to be there but as much as our loved ones want to help us, we really need to be cared for by professionally trained people while having an episode like that. Really he probably shouldn't even be driving, considering in Pschiatric hospitals nobody is allowed to even have toothpicks at supper time
The fact that he was diagnosed 5 months ago means he's adjusting to meds and it does take time to find thr right one. I'm on Lithium only and i'm very lucky my boyfriend who i also bipolar takes epival and seroquil and wellbutrin.
I've never gottes sick while on meds. I had a big space after my frst episode till the next when I wasn't on meds. I was ok for ten years and even manage to graduate from university but got sick right after.
I will never stop tkaing my meds again. I'm doing really well. I'm sure your husband will to. It takes a little time and it's alot to swallow when you first find out. You go through denial and anger, blame etc. It's basically the stages of greif.
Try not to take it all on your shoulders. And take care of you too

GatsbyLuvr1920 · 07-10-2006, 08:26 PM

Lelore- This may be a bit off-topic, but if your husband is delusional (or if he's having hallucinations), then he isn't bipolar II- he's bipolar I. Bipolar II's only are hypomanic in their "up" phase; bipolar I's start their "up" phase as hypomanic, but then eventually descend into full-blown mania. Full-blown mania is characterized by psychotic symptoms, such as delusions and/or hallucinations. You're the second person on here that I've seen where bipolar I was diagnosed as bipolar II... Good luck, God bless, and if you have any questions, feel free to ask!

-GatsbyLuvr1920-