Aye Carumba

Well Griseldis, My wife had a tremedous amount of love for me. We were soulmates/best friends and we both felt we were meant to be together. She started getting BP symtoms 2 1/2 years into our relationship. Went on meds and sought therapy. Everything seemed manageable and I asked her to marry me. She would cycle between devotion to me and distance. I was willing to deal with it, we always worked through it (I would pull her out of it also). She then began flirting with other men. She told me it was harmless fun and made everyone feel good (except me I would say). Over the years the bad times were longer and more frequent, the good times shorter and less frequent. During the distant times, she began hanging out with people that fed her mania. Instead of fighting the BP she immersed herself in it. When manic she would get extremely flirty and wanted to party all the time. She then asked for a divorce 4 years ago. We worked through it, changed her meds, therapy etc. Things were great for a couple months. Then the same cycle happened 1 1/2 yrs later. Now same thing again last month. She can't determine why she wants to leave..is it the BP or her actual feelings? So she moved out 5 weeks ago and has given in to her mania. It's over for us , after all the years together. I'm sure after some time she will want to come back. I can't do it anymore.

Please research the typical actions of people affected with BPD. It's a real emotional roller coaster with real life complications. I thought love would/could conquer all.....I was very wrong. My heart/emotions/self esteem are in pieces. If I could go back in time, I certainly would not get involved with her again.