Help! Depression and hate - Bipolar Disorder Message Board

ronniesteers · 08-25-2006, 09:56 AM

I keep posting, thanks to whoever cares enough to read and/or respond to this. I have been in a depressive phase for over three weeks now. I have been crying at least 7-9 times a day. I am hating the people who love me and generally going through a bad time. Yesterday, I finally called my doctor and told her what was going on. I have an appt. with her next week to talk and go over my medication. (I'm having severe issues from my past). Anway, she wants to start me on Effexor. I haven't picked it up yet. I've been taking 2-3 mg xanax a day to cope. (My Rx is for 1 mg 4x). Anyone with any advice is appreciated. IT's the weekend and tonight I should want to have a good time, right?

xxzoexx · 08-25-2006, 11:04 AM

i have been depressed for 4 months. i't will go away, even if it wants to take it's sweet time. the doctor will be able to help. you may also want to see a therapist if issues from the past are hurting you. you will feel better don't worry, somtimes it just takes time, and figuring out the main cause of your depression. stay strong.

take care.

emeraldeyes114 · 08-25-2006, 11:10 AM

I think the weekend honestly at times is the worst time to go out at least for me. I don't do well in large crowds or with lots of noise and the weekends depending on where you go is usually that. I find the weekday is quieter and easier for me to enjoy food, art exhibits, or whatever it might be. I know to help lift my spirit I watch a favorite comedy like the Blue Collar Comedy Tour. I try to stay off of things that make me feel lonelier then what I already do and for me the net is one of them. I write a lot not just in diary or blog format but stories and poems to help vent and to get my mind onto something else.

If you don't feel like going out don't force yourself. It just makes having a good time harder to do and alcohol is not a bonus if you are down already for many people. Often times friends try to help in whatever they can even if they don't know what to say really or do.

So I am was not too sure on what you were asking but these were the thoughts that came to me.
Emerald

fallen_angel · 08-25-2006, 12:01 PM

Hey ronnie,
i know you're being treated and hopefully they will look into adjusting your meds as you shouldnt be feeling this depressed. As for the issues from the past (which i know we talked about in another thread) have you considered having any sort of therapy? i had counselling to help deal with my past and it did relieve things a little. This is the kind of thing that the meds cannot deal with, and will just mask. so you need to get to the bottom of these feelings and help deal with them to move on.
I agree with Emerald, dont push yourself to go out just because you feel you should. im 24 and all my friends are out partying every weekend, ive only managed to go out 3 times this year. Only do it when you feel like it!
take care ronnie

ronniesteers · 08-25-2006, 12:33 PM

Thanks all for your responses. I just don't understand whyI was doing fine and now I'm not. I don't want to see my parents. There are times when I don't even want to go home to my fiance and 5 year old. Emerald, it is always good to do something to occupy yourself. I guess it takes your mind off the depression. Fallen Angel, yeah I think some issues that I buried are coming to the surface - I don't know why now though? I have two appointments next week one with my med mgnmt person who also does therapy and I made another appointment with a therapist. I don't know if I'm going to keep the second one, though. YOu know, the problem is that when you need the therapy, ie: When I was hysterical and crying several times the other day and could tell my person exactly what the problems are, I couldn't tell her because I have to wait for the damn appointment. So like, you have to wait to reveal your hurt and pain until a stupid appointment? I did call her and tell her I have depressed for a few weeks now and for the past few days there have been crying fits periodically throughout the day (at work, in the car, everywhere). She said she would call in Effexor to my Rx. I don't know if I even want to pick it up. I told her on the phone that I was having a lot of issues right now. How have you been Angel? I've been wondering where you have been.