Ramblings from Jessique - Bipolar Disorder Message Board

Jessique · 05-20-2003, 07:54 AM

Good morning to you all. My name is Jessique, and I am a 19 year old female who lives with Bipolar. I have been diagnosed since I was 14 and have many ups and downs that last awhile or change rapidly. That is how it has been for the last few months. I have been having a difficult time and it seems like the doctors just continue to string me along. About a year and a half ago I was placed into DCYF - Department of Children, Youth and Family Services. I am in an Independent Living Program - ILP - which is wonderful. I get my own apartment and have very few bills to pay at the moment. I am on Serequol and the doctors pushed me all the way up to 800mg, the highest you can go. If you know anything about Serequol you will be surprised to know that it does NOT put me to sleep or make me tired in any way. The doctors have done very little to try to help me get better. I am doing my part - trying to be positive, exercising a lot, talking to people when I am sad, and even taking my meds which seem to do nothing in the hopes that I will wake up one morning and they will have finally kicked in. The doctor knows how I feel, but keeps pushing me off, having me wait a month to my next appointment even though I need something done now.

That's my rambling at the moment.

Oh, does anyone else here, what is it called - I forgot, but where their senses are mixed up? Like, I hear colors, and sometimes see noises. Does anyone else have anything like this. I've been told that it is rare, to have your senses get mixed up like this. I guess other things would be tasting smells, and smelling a particular taste. And like I said before, hearing colors and seeing noises. It is neat, because it is rare for this to happen to someone, but it is also freaky/weird to have these episodes.

Well, love ya ~ Jessique

CobaltBlue · 05-20-2003, 09:08 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Jessique:
Oh, does anyone else here, what is it called - I forgot, but where their senses are mixed up? Like, I hear colors, and sometimes see noises.

Synesthesia I think? I have never experienced it (fortunately)

iduno · 05-20-2003, 01:07 PM

hi jessique,
i thought this synth thing was just normal! for artists it is anyway. i think it is just part of being a sensitive imaginative person. it would be great to see a painting of a noise.

i have had feelings as shapes and other stuff too where senses are improved and where things like words are felt as colours. nothing too much. bit boring compared to yours !

[This message has been edited by iduno (edited 05-20-2003).]

bip69 · 08-16-2003, 01:33 AM

To: Jessique

Hello - I hope all is giong well. You are NOT on the maximum dosage of Serequol, so please don't worry. I take 900 - 1200 per day. Usually take at night time only. 1000 is most likely the norm. Add in 600 Tegretol, and there you have much bettter rest, and a much calmer brain.

I was diaganosed finally at 27. I knew I had it all along, but never wanted to ever see anyone. Once I did, I became a comatosed drug addict!

I have been in studies at Stanford and UT South Wester, these are the to 2 in the nation! UT finally has me about as nornal as I can be, but as we all know, future has no prediction.

List of my tried meds: Depakote, Zonogran, Paxil, Geodon, Wellbutron, Cytomel, Lamitcal, Cyclobenaprine, Sonata, Amdien, Serezone, Serequol, Tergretol, Zyprexa, Lithium, and most likely a few others. At one time I was on 7 different ones.

Yes, yes, yes - I am a bad case.

Can't say I have ever smelled color, etc.... But vioces do palague me about once a year.

Thanks for sharing