I totally agree with Catlover. If you suspect you have bipolar disorder from research, you should know that this disorder does not go away. It is a lifelong illness that must be treated with medication. It's a simple as that. It is not a matter of "willing" it to go away or deciding against making bad "choices." The chemicals in our brains are working against our "normal" decision-making abilities, judgment and moods.
The good news is that the meds DO help, and you do not have to live a depressing and embarassing life like so many of us have for so long. There is treatment, and it has been proven successful for many of us. I am just beginning to see the light at the end of the long, dark, neverending tunnel that I used to call life. Where I once felt isolated and alone and afraid and embarassed and crazy and paranoid and hopeless and worthless and stressed out and disappointed and stupid and ashamed and angry and irritated and...I now feel hopeful, calm, more at peace, more confident, more positive, and surrounded by people who understand.
And so are you.
But I never would have arrived at this place without a proper diagnosis and medication. It's still a stuggle, and I've got a ways to go before I'm well, but I can feel a difference, and it's getting better everyday!