Just checking in because I have not had internet access in a few days. I am now home, and I am O.K. I will need to go to the VA Hospital here to follow up on my medication and doctor visits. I hope everything goes all right.
It was a stressfull time for us all, but it's over.
The home we are trying to buy is in escrow, and we saw it today. It was messy because the people there are packing to move out, but it is very spacey and pretty.
Now I need a job! I just submitted my resume online for a job I have been wanting. Hope there's an opening for me.
Bye for now Strawberry
Welcome back strawberry!
so glad you arrived home safe.
I dont use this board much now, someone on here really upset me and i sometimes feel that this board is turning into less of a support board for those with bipolar, and more of a place for people to slate people in their lives who have bipolar. This certainly doesnt apply to everyone, as i know some people, particularly those with bipolar children, find the board a wonderful source of support and information, and offer support to others,such as Goody, who i think is a lovely person. But sadly not everyone is like that and i sometimes dont see the point on being on this board.
Anyway, enough of my ranting. Im really glad you are ok and please keep us updated!
Wow....I had been thinking about you all day yesterday wondering where you were and how you were doing!! Welcome Home, my friend I am so glad to hear that you and hubby arrived back safely. I am sure that all of what you have endured over the past year is going to hit you.....that is soooo normal because I am going through the same exact thing in my household since it was about a year ago when things got so bad with Erin and now that things have slowed down and she is doing so well I find myself living in the aftershock of it all!!! I would imagine that you are going through much of the same, Strawberry, but everything will be okay....you just take this time like I am to take good care of yourself and pat yourself on the back for a jb well done. You served our country and made us proud and even with the hardhships of facing Bipolar....so now you just focus on YOU and getting yourself feeling better.....promise??????
It must be so exciting to get to see your new home there will be so many new excting things to do.,....you just make sure that you do not overstress yourself. Take your time getting that house ready....hubby and I took our time decorating each room...we started out with a mattress on the floor and a few dressers.....just being there together made it HOME and I am sure that you feel the same way. Make it simple and do what you can do knowing that you have your entire future ahead to fix everything up.
So what type of jobs are you applying for??? I can see you doing anything, Strawberry, you would be an asset to anybody with your wonderful attitude and warm heart. So pick something that you would enjoy doing and that will not be too stressful on you.
I am sooo happy that you are home....I can't wait to tell Erin when she gets home from school today. She knows that I have a candle lit here for you until your safe return just in time for me to use for another who I am keeping in my prayers.
I know how you love to hear news about Erin....she is doing unbelievably well....she came home yesterday with news that she made the Jazz Chorus for which she tried out And she also was nominated by the music director in her school to be part of two regional music festivals so she is really happy about that as well. Oh and Kait is doing well too....can you believe that we recently found out that her room mate is Bipolar Now what are the chances of that??? She just got a job and college life is suiting her well so far so I couldn't be happier. She comes home for a long Thanksgiving break which I am looking very much forward to. Well that's the news on my end of the country!!!
BIG ((((HUGS)))) and a welcome back to a special lady who makes us proud to be Americans ~ Goody
Welcome back Strawberry.... It is so good to see you home with your family again. Take each day for what it is worth.
Believe in today, tomorrow, and your future. There is a future of Strawberry Hill that lives with a job, one that is prosperous in some way of life to get you through this journey (paying bills and so forth), and a life that is filled with love and joy from here on out. Believe in you. The house is the beginning, and the job will follow. You have many crudentials; believe in all you have within yourself.
Thank you for serving for our country. What the armed forces do for our country is phenomenal.
a loving heart is the truest wisdom
Thank you so much guys! I have missed you, I've been stressing out, so I haven't been writing.
It's just wierd to be back, things have changed, and I am having a problem fitting in. I somehow don't feel like drinking anymore, and my husband is the opposite, he has been drinking with friends. I feel bad about it, but we used to do this together, and I used to have a good time. I don't know what's wrong with me.
We have sent resumes out, but have had no news yet. This scares me, how are we going to make house payments? We have some extra money saved up, that can cover us for 2 months, but that was supposed to be for furniture.
Well, I am now trying to get my job back. The computer deleted me from the databease. I only need a physical, I'll get that tomorow. (The lady in charge of my job put me back in the computer)
I can't seem to be taking it easy, I know, one thing at a time. It's just so hard to do. I have not been sleeping well either.
I am not sure what job I want. Still the same choices. I'll just keep the one I have and see what happens. I hope my husband gets the job he wants. He is applying for the job he had before we left (he quit).
We saw our home-to-be. It is so pretty. I hope the paperwork goes through, it should be out of escrow on friday.
We are both worried about this, we want to think it will happen. We keep catching ourselves planning the rooms and all.
Goody, you are right, we are not unpacking all at once, we will take it slow, so we don't clutter the house. Exactly what I was thinkinf, a mattress will be a good start!
I am so happy for you Goody! I hope your Thanksgiving goes as planned.
Angel, don't let a few people get to you and keep you away from here. You and a few others, like you, and Goody, Coffee girl, Ruth and Ben Gone have gotten me through so much. You guys have been good friends to me while I needed someoone that understood what was happening to me. I had no idea what I was facing. This board does so much more good than harm! Stick around, you have made a difference in my life, you may have helped more people than you know.
I went to the VA hospital so I can continue my medicatio here, and I will see a doctor this week.
Nice to hear from you guys. Hi Clocksaver!
HI, Strawberry You take it easy, my friend. Don't worry about too much right now....I know it has got to be tough getting reaclimated to life in the US. It is going to take you some time to make those readjustments. So be easy on yourself.
You have so much going on right now that it worries me that it may place too much stress on you. Perhaps you should ask your doctor about perscribing something for anxiety for a while which may be necessary short term. I did some research and there is one that is good since it is not one you will fear becoming addicted to since it is a natural chemical released by our brains....it is called Gabitril so you may wish to ask the doctor about that and perscribing it until you get back into the swing of things. I have that in my back pocket for Erin if the need ever arrises.
I will be praying that everything goes smoothly with the house, your jobs and getting settled back into life. As far as not drinking you are wise to refrain from doing so for in doing so you will only deter any progress in properly treating your Bipolar. So why not just sip on some cranberry and club soda and join in with your husband and friends....you will look as if you have a drink in hand and not be infringing upon any progress you may have with the meds. Nobody needs to know but you!!
Keep us updated with your job status and plans with your new home. It really is great to know that you are back home again. Try not to worry about fitting in.....that will come in time. Just enjoy meeting new people and try to involve yourself in things that may interest you and relax you as well. Everything will fall into place in due time....you just take care of yourself and hubby too.
Thank you Goody, I will bring this up with the doctor tomorow. I have this small issue with anxiety. I constantly worry about things, if there is nothing to worry about, I will find something. By the way, the diagnosis I read in my file I've been carrying, (the final diagnosis) says I am bipolar II and have some OCD. That is a little understandable, I've been afraid to be that since I was a child. I have gone out of my way to avoid it, apparently I did not do such a good job at avoiding it. BUt the one thing that does get to me is my constant worrying. So I wrote down the name of the medication so I can bring it up.
Thank you so much for all your advice.
ABout the drinking, I usually did not over do it when I was home, a couple of glasses of wine at night. (usually just one to help me sleep)
Today we went out and spent some time at the Legion. My husband had some beer and I had some soda for a while. Tonight I had a glass of wine. I forgot how I did enjoy this before going to bed, but I really don't feel like drinking while out, only at home, and only in moderation.
I feel a little better today. Looks like the loan paperwork is getting a little sticky, but we are pushing through witht he help of the real estate lady.
Seems we have a little extra saved up that I did not know my husband had, he said it can keep us a few months, so it took a lot of pressure off. SO we will be able tomake house payments and not go hungry for a couple of months even if we cannot find a job fast.
Well, thanks again, I'll keep in touch.
PS Hi to Erin
By the way, I was thinking of last time I was prescribed medication, I was so dazed and lost, I was so sedated I was falling asleep while on the job. I am really afraid to be that way again. I will make sure I tell the doctor this too.
Goody, I looked up Gabitrol, how does it work? Mostly, does it make you dazed and lost? Sleepy and confused? Or does it just help you not worry so much?
What do you know about Xanax? I heard about that too, but I have no clue how it feels or how it works.
Hi Strawberry Geez...... this seemed to sink to the bottom before I could even get to it. Things have been quite busy on this forum as well as in my life but first things first.
The Gabitril shouldn't cause much in terms of sleepiness. I think it is taken at night and will help you sleep but shouldn't make you too sleepy from what I have read or heard. The good thing about it is that unlike other antianxiety meds it is not addictive. Xanax is if you take it over a period of time. So I think you should give it a try and see how you respond to it.
I sure hope that your not being around has everything to do with getting settled in your new home and finding a new job. You must give us an update.
Have you been to the doctor yet???? And how did things go??
We had a little setback with Erin.....her friends called me and told me that she has been using weed and was high after her volleyball game. I picked her up and I guess when she got home and was coming down from it she said that she wanted to cut/kill herself. We ended back at the hospital for a night of observation. She seems to be doing okay now although most of the weekend she was agitated and speding more time to herself. She said she was using it because it makes her forget about everything and that it works better than the meds. I know that we have to keep a closer watch on things.....the doctors explained how bad it is to use the weed with the meds and that she needs to give the meds a chance while we are still increasing the Lamictal to get it to a therapeutic dose.
Well I hope to hear something more from you soon....keeping my fingers and toes crossed that all went well with the house and that you will post telling me that you are all moved in!!
Hi, sorry about being gone for so long. We have been back and forth to the VA hospital getting checked to make sure we get anything wrong with us documented if it was caused while in Iraq. I saw the doctor, (well, he saw me). It as a regular docotr, "my primary doctor". He gets to see what I need and referr me to the doctors I need to go to.
He saw my mental health file, and did not read it thoroughly. I tried to pint out things, but he did not listen to well. He doubled my Wellbutrin to 300mg and said I should take 150 in the morning and 150 at night. I was told by the farmacist it wears out in 12 hours, so I need another pill. I disagree, why would I need one at night if I'm sleeping? (That's if htis is true)
By the way, the pill bottle says "For depression". The doctor decided I have major depression, he said that's what the file says. I tried to show him my diagnosis, it's written on different pages, but he saw one word in there and it stood out: "deperession". That was not the diagnosis, it was a symptom.
So, against all I know, I have not taken the double dose, I will wait until I see the Psychiatrist next week.
I hope Erin gets better, you were doing so well, I'm sure you'll get there again. I just hope it's soon.
Have you checked on "full spectrum lights"? I forget if we spoke about them before. They sell it in light bulbs now. They are supposed to help with dperession or low moods. They are supposed to mimic sunlight, and are especially good for short winter days.
Well, I'll try to keep coming to the board more often.
I will bring up the new anxiety meds you mentioned when I see the psych.
Bye for now