I am new ( just today) to this message board & although i've shied away from them because I was afraid i'd get sucked up into "pity party" mode, I think I need someone to talk to TODAY & of course it's the weekend & all you talk to are message machines! I have been diagnosed bi-polar & on meds. for nine years. Ninety percent of the time I am stable & able to work & function. This is not one of those times.I have felt myself starting to cycle into depression for a few weeks now & right now I am still able to reach out for help or guidance.I need someone to give me a kick in the pants & also to tell me how they overcame EXTREME inertia.I have an appt. with pdoc on Monday but he's a bit of an issue in himself. Here's my dilemma: he is the only doc who knew that I was bi-polar & he has kept me 90% stable for nine years. HOWEVER, he just won't TALK! Maybe I need talk-therapy along with meds. but when I mention it to him he just says" do you think so?" and drops it. I have become soooo inactive & I hate it. My house isn't filthy but it looks just like my mind feels right now REALLY CLUTTERED!I have panic attacks when I think about trying to get my house back in order because I know that i'll never get as much done as needs to be. This is a serious thing with me. I don't want to go home from work & face the messy house & when I have a day off I just stay in bed all day because I just can't get started. Anyone else out there have this problem....tell me how you got yourself up & productive again. This isn't just the last day or two; i've been like this for about 5 months. Help!
HI, Welcome Yes, the weekends are slow here and I just wanted to hop on board and say hello to you. I am not Bipolar but have a 15 year old daughter who was recently diagnosed. It is not easy for her or for us and we have yet to be stabilized but things are a heck of alot better than they were around 3 months ago.
The thing that I must commend you on is knowing that things are not right at this moment and that something should be done. WE are gettting into the winter months when that alone can trigger depression....SAD I beleive it is referred to. So you may wish to talk to your doctor about that and an adjustment in your meds. Also, I noticed your age and you are in that peri/menopausal age group so that may be coming into play as well. So perhaps a little tuneup is what you need in order to get through this time. Since your doctor has not failed you so far and you trust his treatment, I would discuss this more with him next time you meet or perhaps even sooner if need be.
As far as the doctor visits....the psychiatrist serves as a perscribing doctor based upon what you share with him regarding your moods and symptoms. I would definitely recommend you find a therapist as well who works specifically with CBT (Congitive Behavioral Therapy) which I have heard works well in teaching you coping skills and specific ways of directing your thinking towards changing your behavior that could trigger anger or irritability or anxiousness which is so charactereistic of Bipolar.
As far as the house....let it be....if it causes you undue anxiety perhaps asking your husband or another family member to assist you until you are feeling better may help. If you feel that you need to do something, then set a realistic goal and clean one drawer, corner, or room at a time. Separate it into small pieces rather than a big piece that is unmanageable. This will allow you to use that energy that you do have and allow you to do something that you want to do in a realistic way that won't have you feeling bad that you couldn't accomplish it.
I have read that walking is a great reliever of depression. Get yourself out of bed and outside even for a short walk....this will at least keep you from going even further down.
See if your doctor can recommend a therapist....it really seems like you need to talk and that will also help. In any case there are many wonderful people here who know just what you are going throuh and will help you through. Meanwhile......share what you are going through with your doctor and ask him if there is something he would suggest in terms of adding to or readjusting your meds. I believe that you said you are on Lamictal....perhaps a little increase in that will do the trick since it is known to address the depressive side of things OR a small dose of an antidepressant such as wellbutrin which will not increase mania will help.
I will be checking in every now and then so if you need someone to talk to just let me know.
Thanks for your warm welcome...it's just what I needed today. Funny how just a small gesture can really help so much to lift the spirits & let you know that SOMEONE'S out there!
Your advice is sound advice and you're also pretty perceptive. I'm being hit from all sides right now. You were right on target when you guessed about the menopause factor. That's going on now on top of the bi-polar disorder and several other health issues (overweight, can't stop smoking, high blood pressure & on & On!) But i've always been a fighter even in all the years before I had a correct diagnosis. I have always known that it was some kind of mental illness & was actually so relieved when the pdoc put a name to it & told me he could treat it.
Have taken your advice already. Got up, took a shower, tidied up the house a BIT and cooked my husband a good dinner.You're also right about exercise...i'm a bus driver; many hours sitting behind the wheel, so no exercise there! I work lots of hours and don't always feel like exercising when I get home. BUT...I have the sweetest little mini-dachsund named Bob Barker & he needs a good walk every day, so that helps.
If you feel it will help please tell your daughter for me that even though she may not feel lucky, she really is.I would have given anything to be stable ( or working towards it) at her age.Although I have a pretty good life other than the occasional really bad cycles, I believe my life could have been so much more productive if i'd been medicated & supervised when I was her age. Tell her i'll keep her in my thoughts & to FIGHT it; don't let the disease win!
Hello, I can relate to a lot of what you have written. I have never not gotten out of bed, but t hat is probably only because I know my husband w ould make such a big to-do about that & I hate attention brought on to myself, that I get up...but I have many days where I barely get ANYthing done, & all it does is make my depression worse. And yet I can't get going. Oh, I'll finally get SOMEthing done, but it is nowhere near what I pl anned to do. To add to the stress we are moving sometime between now & April-April if our daughter's house doesn't sell, if it sells, within 30 days of it selling so she & her family can move in here...so besides just trying to get the normal housework, etc, done, I have to pack what I can to move & get ready for a garage sale. I have boxes & bags all over my house & I am now working on the basement but it takes me many many days to get just a small portion done. I am so afraid my daughter will say "it's sold!" & here we'll be not ready. My husband is little help at this point, he just doesn't seem to see the rush, & my family (sisters, etc-kids are all grown) don't understand, because when they need to put a fire under t hemselves they just DO IT. And don't see why I can't. I am Schizoaffective which is Schizophrenia & Bipolar II paranoid....after 3 weeks of rapid cycling & hallucinations & delusions, yesterday just like POOF-I felt "normal". Couldn't believe it. Last time I went through this hell it was 3 months, this time only about 3 weeks...but I never know when it will rear its ugly head again. Then today down into the pit of depression again...I've been crying at every little thing. And I am peri-menopausal, & it is dreary here & raining & snowing & has been dreary for days so all these things don't help. But I have no idea if it was sunny out if I'd feel just as bad, & I don't know if it's menopause coming or not-guess it doesn't really matter does it, the pits is the pits. Today we went over to the house we're going to move to, a move I'm happy about, but all I could do is stand at the window & look out at the water & gorgeous fall colored leaves & cry & feel sad....I thought I'd spend the winter too busy & ha ppy about the move to have this horrible stuff attack me, but I guess this disease doesn't take those things into account. Well I've offered no advice, just let you know I guess you're not alone...can't wait for the sun to come out again, in more ways than one.