I was diagnosed with bipolar 10 months ago. Was put on Lithium but had to come off it because it made me severly ill. I have not been medicated in 8 months and am going through bouts of alchol and drug use. This is causing a strain on my current relationship. I informed my boyfriend from the begining that I have bipolar and sent him links to bipolar sites to help him understand what it is and it's effects on me, but he doesn't seem to get it. I have done some things while drunk or high that I am not proud of and told him about it afterwards and apologized for what I had done. I'm not sure what else I can do to make things right between us or how to get him to really understand the whole situation. I didn't do these things to hurt him and can't explain why I did them. I feel that had I not been drunk or high that these things would not have happened. He seems to think that a little bit of love will make me all better. What can I do?
Booze and drugs can make things worse rather then have the self medicating affect that many might take them for. I know for me I had to quit drinking and chuck the rest out of the window well down the tolette. Start with that and also like Jason mentioned getting a pdoc and better meds that don't make you ill.
Others who don't really understand exactly what Bipolar is or what it means sometimes believe jsut a little more love and compassion and the world will be alright. I wish for all involved that it were really that easy. From the way you wrote it and what you said he is with you and loves you very much. That is important that if he were going to run at the first sign of trouble. He probably would have done so already and yet voila he is there trying. Also try talking about how you are feeling and maybe get a book on Bipolar I know there are members here who have mentioned a few but I can't remember them right off! So hopefully they will mention them just one more time. I think one was Bipolar for Dummies but not sure on that either.
Do you still have a pdoc? If not get one and if so ask their advice or the therapist about to handle this. THey I am sure will have some awesome idears as well as those on this board!
I know where your coming from - bipolar highs and lows can be extremely detrimental to a relationship, it certainly came very close to destroying mine - we broke up and got back together, and now things are much better. The key is communication. My partner didn't understand why I'd get REALLY mad and start screaming, or get really hyper, or be so depressed that I'd just want to hide and fade away - but now that I tell him what I'm feeling, and why, he does his best to understand. It's not perfect, but we work at it each and every day.
No one else has said it, and I hope you don't take offense hon - but you need to get control over your abuse of drugs and alcohol. These things don't mix well with bipolar disorder, nor do they help your medications do what they are supposed to do. It would be very hard for your boyfriend to watch you doing this, if he's read anything about bipolar on the Internet, he probably already knows the affects of substance abuse on people with bipolar disorder. Talk to your pdoc and/or tdoc and be strong - we can all take control of this disorder, there is no need whatsoever for it to control us.
I am looking for a new pdoc, it's just taking a while because there aren't many good ones around here so I am looking in another state that is close by. As for meds....once I can get a good pdoc I will be able to get on something.
Last edited by whirlwind4; 06-06-2007 at 07:51 PM.
Reason: needed to change wording
Thanks for the advice. Since my last post things are going better. I have started taking Naltexone to help with my alcohol and drug abuse. I have asked 2 good friends (a retired EMT and a retired Psychcologist) to help me find a good pdoc. I work a lot and need all the help I can get to find one.
MY boyfriend and I had a long talk last night and it went well. He seemed to be more understanding of things. He still doesn't understand all of it, but I don't think there is no understanding it fully whether you have bipolar or are a loved one of someone who is Bipolar. I'm just lucky his willing to stick around. He is being very supportive of the steps I am taking to get things on track.