Never Happy.... - Bipolar Disorder Message Board

it_cant_be_true · 06-09-2007, 08:58 PM

I am not sure what is wrong with me, it was my birthday yesterday and I made my husband promise not to get me anything, well he didn't. And I was ****ed! I always seem to do the same thing, I will tell him I do not want to celebrate holidays then I get mad that he does not want to either, holidays suck for me as do birthdays. Why do I do this to myself?????? I do not want nor expect things, but when I do not get those things, I feel so empty, hurt, neglected, unloved, no one cares for me, wah wah wah.....

It isn't just my husband, its anyone else who I decide to be angry with in that moment.

I feel crappy...

I shouldn't be unhappy or argumentative but I keep coming right back to that comfort zone.....

sorry to be rambling.

thanks for listening....any advice would be greatly appreciated

FYI Me: 33 y/o married mom of 2 newly dx w/ BP (3.5 weeks) was on risperdol, no longer taking dt side effects, now on abilify, (2nd day) current mood: sad...

Dantheinsane · 06-09-2007, 09:46 PM

Do this to yourself, we all do that. And I really know better than to listen to my wife when she says that. One year we were really broke and she said it and meant it.

It was the first year of our marriage. I bought her a beautiful hope chest. We have now been married for 26 years. We still have that beautiful hope chest.

Your husband has a lot to learn.

luckygem13 · 06-10-2007, 01:25 AM

I've been married 18 years to a bipolar husband. At this point, I tell him what I want, heck sometimes I buy it and wrap it for him and act surprised when I open it! It's all he is capable of (in the gift giving department) and I love him anyway: ) I'm not sure if sharing this helps you but I hope, in some way, it does.

Don't sweat the small stuff....and it's ALL small stuff.

Luvya, Luckygem

it_cant_be_true · 06-10-2007, 05:19 AM

thats the same thing my husband says too! Its not a big deal, but to me I go into a major melt down, even though I am the one who said I do not want anything....l...

JasonFMX · 06-10-2007, 01:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by it_cant_be_true

FYI Me: 33 y/o married mom of 2 newly dx w/ BP

I sent this up to Captain Kirk on the Enterprise to get decrypted. I'll have to wait till Spock gives me his findings before I can fully comment.

One thing I found out with relationships so far is that I hate almost everyone that I come into contact with, so theres no question that under normal circumstances I could/would/have problems in a relationship. My wife had/has some problems of her own as well that would most definately of interupted a relationship. But you know what ? Thats pretty much the vast majority of relationships out there. I seriously beleive that most people that are in a relationship together shouldn't be. Pure statistics will tell you that 50% of all marraiges end in divorce and thats just the ones that decide to end it, not counting the ones that just decide to live in misery, get seperated, or be roommates and just cheat on eachother or whatever your fancy is. Also, there is a 80% divorce rate for marraiges with one partner being Bipolar. However, my wife and I get along almost perfectly. We have been together in eachother's company since the day of our first date. Not one day has gone by that we haven't been together. 99% of the time we're together all day everyday, and we never fight or get on eachothers nerves at all. That is what a relationship is suppose to be like. So to sum up what my point is, you basically have three choices when it comes to stuff like this. 1. Realize you have a problem and get help. 2. Get out of the relationship. or 3. Realize whats important in life and stop complaining about things that are trivial at best. Some people in the world don't have food, or a warm place to sleep at night. Some people can't walk down the street without fear of being shot or beaten or raped. Go watch the movie Hostel or Hostel II. That will make just appreciate that garbage isn't real and if it is be glad your not there.

All I know is that I'm not a mind reader. If someone pleaded with me not to do something I would have to conclude they didn't want me to do it and therefore I wouldn't. Anyone thinking anyone else is wrong. For instance, I hate birthdays, I think they are pointless. Everyone knows not to get me birthday presents (that goes for Christmas too). I don't get ****ed at everyone when I don't get presents. Why ?.... becuase I told everyone not to. If I wanted presents I would just let them buy me presents.