I believe that I have been misdiagnosed for years. I am positive that I am bipolar and have been trying to tell my doctors about it. I am sure most of you have gotten that look from your doctor when you tell them an idea and try to "self diagnose".I feel like my therapist won't listen to me. She seems to think I am fine becuase I always happen to see her on "happy days" or I can't seem to put my feelings and the way I think into words that make sense. My best friend is a Grad student studying psych, and he confirmed my thoughts on being bipolar.
I have been trying to handle it as best I can. I know some things that seem to trigger me, and I try to use mania to do things like clean the entire house etc. Sometimes it actually scares me, like the times when I suddenly feel so full of rage that I feel like throwing things and breaking them just to get the emotions out of my system. I feel like my skin is crawling. I am not a very violent person so when I feel full of rage and violence it makes me uneasy and sets me into feeling horrible about myself. (when I tried to tell that to my therapist she gave me a weird look and told me "I really have no idea what would cause thoughts like that)
So now I am looking for help, the symptom list and description for Biploar 2 is a snapshot of my life but I can't seem to convince my therapist that I am not ok. I have been treated for years, and on numerous different medications (mostly for just depression or anxiety). I have an issue with medication when it comes to taking it consistently. I take it for awhile and then I stop taking it becuase I feel good and don't "need it" anymore. Every time I go off of another depression medication it seems like my problems get worse and worse. I feel frustrated becuase I start things out and they are going well (like school or work) and then I hit a period that screws everything up, I have l lost more than one job, and haven't been able to finish college.
My life feels out of control, I don't feel secure about my future. I would really love to hear advice on how to get correctly diagnosed, I am so tired of just being told that I am depressed or that I have GAD (general anxiety disorder). I keep getting treated for one thing, instead of treating the real disorder and I seriously don't know how to get it across to my therapist.
Sorry for getting a bit detailed here, it is my first time here and I guess I got excited that the people reading would understand some of what I am saying.