im hurt! - Bipolar Disorder Message Board

teresa2007 · 01-24-2008, 11:13 AM

My sister call me today and ask me if i still had that ottoman she gave me and i didnt, i sold it in the garage sale. Well she was very very mad at me and screamed at me and i told her i was very sorry, she didnt want to talk too me anymore.
Well the first thing i thought when i got off the phone was that i was a very very bad person, im stupid and i wanted to hurt myself.
Now im all upset again thinking im a bad person and i want to hurt myself. I just wondered if other bipolar people react this way when something simple like this happens or is it just me, am i just weird.
I know im not on the right cocktail of medicine right now and i have no pdoc to talk either but ive really always been like this anyways.but does other bpers go thru this too? any comments would be appreciated.
Tee

luvmybabies2 · 01-24-2008, 11:48 AM

No, I never want to hurt myself, but lots of bipolar people do, so it can be a symptom of your bipolar. First you need to be on the correct medicine. Do you have any kids at home to help you get this off of your mind?

Also, I would call a doctor or therapist today and get some help, you cannot allow people to upset you that way. I ended up in the E.R. with a panic attack for allowing my mother to get to me that way. It's not good for your health.

And say the serenity prayer during times like this, it really works, say it 100 times a day if you have to, and eventually it will sink in.

"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change, the courage to change the things that I can, and the wisdom to know the difference".

You must accept that you cannot get the ottoman back and accept that your sister is upset, then you must realize that you cannot change any of that, you cannot change the way that your sister is acting, but you CAN change the way that you RESPOND to her, then you must move on..........Your sis will get over it, and I would say screw her!

Just tell your sister, in the most calmest voice that you have. "I'm sorry that you are so upset, maybe we should talk when you are more calm". Goodbye, hang up the phone. Don't let her put a guilt trip on you, you did nothing wrong.

JMHO

Mia

Quote:

Originally Posted by teresa2007

My sister call me today and ask me if i still had that ottoman she gave me and i didnt, i sold it in the garage sale. Well she was very very mad at me and screamed at me and i told her i was very sorry, she didnt want to talk too me anymore.
Well the first thing i thought when i got off the phone was that i was a very very bad person, im stupid and i wanted to hurt myself.
Now im all upset again thinking im a bad person and i want to hurt myself. I just wondered if other bipolar people react this way when something simple like this happens or is it just me, am i just weird.
I know im not on the right cocktail of medicine right now and i have no pdoc to talk either but ive really always been like this anyways.but does other bpers go thru this too? any comments would be appreciated.
Tee

seaturtle · 01-24-2008, 04:22 PM

Hi,

Well, if someone gives you something, it then belongs to you. If a gift is freely given, as it should be, then you are perfectly free to do whatever you want with it. If she didn't give you an indication that she wanted it back at some point, then she has no right to get upset with you.

I get the same way, very upset is someone is upset with me or I think I've done something wrong, but with time, I try to put it in perspective and see often that it is the other person who has the problem, not me. And I think your sister is the one with the problem here, not you.

You're in no way a bad person for selling it. Why shouldn't you, since it belonged to you?

Your sister is out to lunch on this one, I think. Talk with your therapist about it. I know it's hard not to take things to heart and assume that since someone is unhappy with something we've done, we must be guilty and horrible. But that's just not true.

I hope you get some realtime help with this and can deal with these feelings and see things realistically, not emotionally.

Wishing you all the best.

steamrollhehe · 01-24-2008, 06:35 PM

Hi Tee,

You are NOT, I repeat, NOT a bad person. She gave you that, so she has no right to take it back. I'm sure your sister will get over it, just give her a little while. Try not to worry about it too much.

I react in the same way when something gets me upset. I think I'm stupid and I want to hurt myself. Sometimes I do hurt myself and always regret it afterwards. Don't do anything rash, you'll wish you hadn't later. I'm sure you are a nice person and you don't deserve to hurt yourself. No matter how big a deal you think it is now, when you look at the whole scope of things one fight isn't the end of the world.

I would also suggest that you get a pdoc asap! The right combo of meds is key to your health. Do you have a tdoc? I think that might also help, if you don't already have one.

Feel better soon,
--steamroll

sassy8 · 01-25-2008, 10:23 AM

Theresa; Please take it easy on yourself you didn't know that your sister was going to ask for it back. It was a communication problem on her part. Once someone gives you something then it's yours. Your not a bad person. I would have thought the same thing. Yes, I think alot of us bipolar people get down on ouselves over little and big things. We're just very sensitive. Most of us are very compassionate people too. Anytime that you want to hurt yourself call your crisis hotline. Don't stay alone. You are important. Keep posting, hugs to you, Sassy