i have been living with the diagnosis of bipolar for a little over a year now. i am taking lamictal, abilify, and provigil. the meds are helping in that i don't get the highs and lows (although i miss the highs), but they do make me tired. i don't feel as productive as i once was which discourages me, but i realize i have to be gentle with myself.
i have been battling depression for much of my life as well. i have had three hospitalizations and there are days where again i wait for the other shoe to drop. i worry about being able to take care of myself. i do have steady, full-time work, which i am grateful for but there are days i dream of not having to work. i realize the difficulty of applying for and getting disability though, which snaps me back into reality.
i take things a day at a time, the good as well as the bad. i'd like to get back into some of the things i used to do that were good for me. i'm trying new things as well. things are not coming as quickly or sticking as well as they used to, which frustrates me, but i realize i am as different now as i have ever been. getting used to a new reality takes time.
i've been on the meds since my diagnosis a little over a year ago. the provigil was added a little later. i work inconsistent shifts, which probably contributes to the tiredness. i don't sleep regularly. at this point i don't know how adjusting the dosages would help. i adjust with caffeine, which isn't the best solution i know, but i mentioned the situation to my doctor and she said it was o.k. some days i need it more than others. some days i sleep more than others. i do notice a prolonged tiredness after waking up some days. the provigil does help. as this point i think its more of a work issue than a meds
issue. the work is pretty physical as well.