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Old 04-09-2009, 01:22 PM   #1
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dreams in neon HB Userdreams in neon HB User
Please Don't Criticize Me

Hi everyone,

Please don't criticize me for this, but I decided to call my old pdoc's office and ask if he'd be willing to see me again.

I've been having a very difficult time accepting the fact that I could no longer see him.

I have an appointment with my old pdoc on April 23rd at 1:15pm. I'm so glad I can see him again because he really was a wonderful pdoc.

I'm also planning to talk to my tdoc about trying CBT or DBT to help control my rapid cycling and agitation to see if that helps me maintain more stability.

Again, please don't criticize me for doing this. I really missed my old pdoc and despite the fact that I was very angry about the way he left things, I think we had a very good professional relationship.
__________________
Atypical Bipolar I Disorder with Rapid Cycling
Meds:
Depakote 1500mg
Prozac 40mg
Risperdal 1mg titrating to 6mg/day
Klonopin .5mg (2x/day)
Trazodone 100mg or 200mg PRN

Last edited by dreams in neon; 04-09-2009 at 01:23 PM.

 
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Old 04-09-2009, 06:44 PM   #2
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seaturtle HB User
Re: Please Don't Criticize Me

Criticize? Never. Whatever you need, you go and grab it.

I know you really liked this guy - I just thought it was impossible for you to continue seeing him. I'm glad to hear you can go back.

Besides, it is a woman's prerogative to change her mind as often as she wishes. Not to mention that you have so much self-knowledge and take such care of yourself.

Many hugs,

Seaturtle

 
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Old 04-09-2009, 10:06 PM   #3
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Llama HB User
Re: Please Don't Criticize Me

Seaturtle is right! No need to worry about people criticizing you here. We like you too much!

 
Old 04-09-2009, 10:14 PM   #4
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caitlin122 HB User
Re: Please Don't Criticize Me

I agree with seatturtle and llama. you will never be critized here for your feelings. You feelings are your feelings and we don't get to chose how we fill. You need to do what you feel is best for you, and only you know what that is. If seeing your old pdoc helps you, then I say go for it. You need to have no feelings of quilt whatsoevery. It's great that he agreed to see you again!

 
Old 04-09-2009, 10:33 PM   #5
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dreams in neon HB Userdreams in neon HB User
Re: Please Don't Criticize Me

Quote:
Originally Posted by seaturtle View Post
Criticize? Never. Whatever you need, you go and grab it.

I know you really liked this guy - I just thought it was impossible for you to continue seeing him. I'm glad to hear you can go back.

Besides, it is a woman's prerogative to change her mind as often as she wishes. Not to mention that you have so much self-knowledge and take such care of yourself.

Many hugs,

Seaturtle
Thanks, Seaturtle.

I thought I could no longer see my old pdoc as well, but according to what his receptionist told me today, he was willing to schedule another appointment. When I see him on the 23rd, I plan to let him know how I feel and how I hope we can continue where we left off. I think that if I work hard enough to get better by using CBT or DBT to help control my rapid cycling, he won't have any problem with seeing me on a long-term basis until he retires.
__________________
Atypical Bipolar I Disorder with Rapid Cycling
Meds:
Depakote 1500mg
Prozac 40mg
Risperdal 1mg titrating to 6mg/day
Klonopin .5mg (2x/day)
Trazodone 100mg or 200mg PRN

 
Old 04-09-2009, 10:34 PM   #6
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: WI
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dreams in neon HB Userdreams in neon HB User
Re: Please Don't Criticize Me

Quote:
Originally Posted by Llama View Post
Seaturtle is right! No need to worry about people criticizing you here. We like you too much!
Awww. Thanks, Llama!! I love all of you too!! Hugs!!
__________________
Atypical Bipolar I Disorder with Rapid Cycling
Meds:
Depakote 1500mg
Prozac 40mg
Risperdal 1mg titrating to 6mg/day
Klonopin .5mg (2x/day)
Trazodone 100mg or 200mg PRN

 
Old 04-09-2009, 10:36 PM   #7
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: WI
Posts: 4,189
dreams in neon HB Userdreams in neon HB User
Re: Please Don't Criticize Me

Quote:
Originally Posted by caitlin122 View Post
I agree with seatturtle and llama. you will never be critized here for your feelings. You feelings are your feelings and we don't get to chose how we fill. You need to do what you feel is best for you, and only you know what that is. If seeing your old pdoc helps you, then I say go for it. You need to have no feelings of quilt whatsoevery. It's great that he agreed to see you again!
Thank you, caitlin! I was worried about letting everyone know about my decision for fear of being criticized because I was *so* angry at how my old pdoc left things. I've had time to calm down since then and have felt nothing but sadness over the fact that I could no longer see him.
__________________
Atypical Bipolar I Disorder with Rapid Cycling
Meds:
Depakote 1500mg
Prozac 40mg
Risperdal 1mg titrating to 6mg/day
Klonopin .5mg (2x/day)
Trazodone 100mg or 200mg PRN

Last edited by dreams in neon; 04-09-2009 at 10:38 PM.

 
Old 04-09-2009, 10:38 PM   #8
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caitlin122 HB User
Re: Please Don't Criticize Me

That must be a stres lifted off your shoulders, and any little bit less of stress we have the better.

 
Old 04-09-2009, 10:46 PM   #9
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: WI
Posts: 4,189
dreams in neon HB Userdreams in neon HB User
Re: Please Don't Criticize Me

Quote:
Originally Posted by caitlin122 View Post
That must be a stres lifted off your shoulders, and any little bit less of stress we have the better.
I feel as if the world has been lifted off of my shoulders because of how depressed I've been feeling about this whole thing. I can't tell you how often I've gone back and forth debating whether or not I should call his office to ask if he would be willing to see me again. I'm just happy that he will.
__________________
Atypical Bipolar I Disorder with Rapid Cycling
Meds:
Depakote 1500mg
Prozac 40mg
Risperdal 1mg titrating to 6mg/day
Klonopin .5mg (2x/day)
Trazodone 100mg or 200mg PRN

 
Old 04-10-2009, 12:26 AM   #10
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: WI
Posts: 4,189
dreams in neon HB Userdreams in neon HB User
Re: Please Don't Criticize Me

Hi again everyone,

I just wanted to let you know that I will keep all of you updated as to what happens at my appointment on the 23rd with my old pdoc.

I plan to sit down and have an honest discussion with him about the way I feel.

I'm hopeful that we will be able to meet each other halfway and continue seeing each other long-term especially if I inform him of the fact that I plan to use CBT or DBT to control my rapid cycling.

If he sees that I'm making more of an effort to get better, perhaps he'll change his mind about me seeing another pdoc.

Aside from that, I also intend to let him know that ever since I started taking Risperdal, I haven't heard any voices, so if he's concerned about treating that aspect of my bipolar, it shouldn't be a problem since I'm no longer having any symptoms as long as I'm not manic or depressed.
__________________
Atypical Bipolar I Disorder with Rapid Cycling
Meds:
Depakote 1500mg
Prozac 40mg
Risperdal 1mg titrating to 6mg/day
Klonopin .5mg (2x/day)
Trazodone 100mg or 200mg PRN

Last edited by dreams in neon; 04-10-2009 at 12:27 AM.

 
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