Help me understand - Bipolar Disorder Message Board

realproblemnow · 05-05-2009, 09:12 PM

My wife was Diagnosed Bi polar ii bpd, rapid cycling 7 years ago. She left home and 4 kids 3 months ago. Kids doctors say to wait it out, but it feels different than prior episodes. Shes living with another man and doesn't contact kids more than a couple times a month. She has not taken meds. in 3 years and has been hypo manic for the prior 1.5 years! before that she was in a depressive cycle. My question: do I wait or move on? She wants a divorce and I am willing to follow through with it but I don't know if she is in the right frame of mind to make that decision. Will she "come around?"

katlin09 · 05-05-2009, 09:25 PM

If she is refusing to take her meds....then honestly the likelyhood of her getting her BP and BPD under control is pretty slim. I have BP II and Borderline Personality Disorder and I know if I didn't take my meds, I'd quite literally be insane. I think I'd give her the divorse and just get on with you and your kids life. If she "grows up" and starts to treat her BPII and BPD then perhaps you could get back together, but rght now I don't see that happening, esp. if she's living with a diff. man. I realize this is incredibly hard for you, but you never know, she may just be testing you. The one thing is are you going to be able to trust her from this point on?

This is all just my opion of course. But I hope you find some piece of your in your current situation.

kat

dreams in neon · 05-06-2009, 12:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by realproblemnow

My wife was Diagnosed Bi polar ii bpd, rapid cycling 7 years ago. She left home and 4 kids 3 months ago. Kids doctors say to wait it out, but it feels different than prior episodes. Shes living with another man and doesn't contact kids more than a couple times a month. She has not taken meds. in 3 years and has been hypo manic for the prior 1.5 years! before that she was in a depressive cycle. My question: do I wait or move on? She wants a divorce and I am willing to follow through with it but I don't know if she is in the right frame of mind to make that decision. Will she "come around?"

As difficult as it is, I would move on.

I have BPI with rapid cycling where my moods change every hour and sometimes every minute. I also have psychotic symptoms that occur whenever I'm manic, depressed, ill or exhausted. If I did not take my meds, I would end up rapid cycling 24 hours/day if not every minute, hearing voices, having difficulty with delusional thinking as well as feeling extremely paranoid.

Taking meds on daily basis is imperative for reducing and relieving episodes.

I don't mention this to scare you, but if she does not continue to take her meds, BPII can turn into BPI which means that a person experiences full blown mania which is severe compared to hypomania.

tigger5150 · 05-07-2009, 12:14 AM

I agree, as difficult as it may be you most likely need to move on, not just for your sanity and peace of mind but for the children as well as they need stability and as long as she is not taking her meds she will never be able to provide that.

16 years ago, before I was diagnosed I was probably much like your wife. Had I been diagnosed and treated it might have been different but my husband basically told me to make a decision to change my behavior (which I didn't know why i was doing some of the things I was) or move out....... I moved out and rarely saw my kids for a very long time. Not proud of it now, but had I stayed it might have had a very negative impact on them in the end. Good Luck with your decsion.

realproblemnow · 05-07-2009, 05:08 AM

Thank you for your honesty and care in answering my question. I truly appreciate it.