I suppose the saying that pain is inevitable,in one way shape or form applies here.
Although i'm experiencing physical pain,psychologically i've been able to convince myself that worse has been endured.

As it seems to work and by all accounts is true,it seems to put me at an advantage.

Now don't get me wrong;i'm not anti-medication but rather pro-"me."
To know that I definitely have to be dependent on a pain med as opposed to "possibly may...

How am I suppose to move on without forgiveness? And what exactly am I to do with the wake of emotions and injury caused by this drama? How exactly do you forgive not only betrayal but intent to harm and kill? How do you get past knowing the years you spent were a facade? That someone you believed was always lying about who they were? How do you move forward when you are afraid for your safety? Knowing they have planned for your death, and may still be planning? That any conversation lasts 10 seconds...

Gosh, at 60 I figured we would be looking for a smaller house or condo to live easier. I am 4 years into a drama filled divorce with a husband who has cheated for years. I just found out two years ago how long he cheated and manipulated me into thinking I was losing my mind. Of course he lied about everything. When it all hit the fan I had no idea he had been cheating with this one woman who makes it her life goal to ruin marriages. Mine was her fifth. He made up stories about me taking drugs and...

At this point, I should've known better but some innate,unresolved childhood insecurity still left in me,caused this.

Let me rewind this a little....

Early February of this year,I decided to enter into the world of stocks.
I explained this to my father and explained to him that I did the research and all but was met with "be careful" then and every time since.

One of my picks is outperforming the rest,so I had to share this with my father,right?...

I thought to myself that the most effective way to prove others wrong is by actions;words tend to come off as empty gestures (depending upon the circumstance).
When I look back at all my deeds and misdeeds;the good,bad and ugly,I am faced with a few complex questions:

1) Who am I?
2) What do I want out of life?
3) Where can I find true happiness?
4) Once I locate it,how do I keep from misplacing this priceless gem?

The answers lie within,as...