Giving Ourselves Support
1) Be more outwardly focused. This accomplishes an number of things. First you don't dwell on your condition. Secondly, doing things like posting on these boards about other people's issue and offering what help I can makes me feel better. Just knowing I helped at all makes me happy and that gives me an [B][I]endorphin[/I][/B] release. Our bodies own pain killer.
2) Look for ways to keep distracted. I am currently working on a sudoku book my brother bought me for Christmas, to try and regain some of the mental acuity the medications have deprived me of. I also play online games with my girlfriend and am part of a huge Online gaming community that I join in 2001 and is actually how I met my girlfriend. The community is all about giving and even though I have only played my latest game for 11 months I have been given so much I leveled up quickly and am playing with the same quality of equipment as my friends, so I can join them in whatever quests they are doing together. I in turn contribute back what I can and its a win win situation. PM me if you are interested in online gaming.
All of these things I can do while laying down in bed...
3) Take control.... Its taken months but I finally got the letters I needed from my doctor for Vocational Rehabilitation and a permit to take my specially modified electric assisted bike on the bus and on the trains using the handicap ramps. Also I'm proactive in my treatment... researching online... reviewing my charts with my doctor... asking about alternative treatments and how they relate to my condition...
I'm persistent to the point of possibly being accused of being too stubborn but when they know you aren't going to sulk off quietly then they will eventually give you something you need. Mind you I am always polite and considerate in my requests but I don't stop asking until I get what I need or an alternative with an explanation of why we need to pursue the alternate route.
I can empathize with your level of frustration... currently I'm looking for a way off the meds. The key is to approach it logically and rationally. Easier said than done, I know.
Call your old friends and talk about anything but your condition. You know they can't possibly grasp what you are going through, so any discussion will most likely lead to frustration on your part and possibly guilt and frustration on their part from not knowing what to say. Talk about books, movies, TV shows... reestablish your relationships conversing on common interests. Or even just listening to what is new in their lives. Rebuilding those friendships will make you happy and bingo [B][I]endorphins[/I][/B].
Also with your condition you are probably more available if any of them wanted to call and talk to someone. So let them know you are there if they ever need to talk. Maybe they might call you with one of their problems and you can at the very least just listen. Again you help them out they feel better and you feel happy from being a good friend, boom [B][I]endorphins[/I][/B]. You might even have good advice for them coming from a different perspective. [I]Just don't be the victim, "well at least you don't have to live with pain everyday".[/I] If they are experiencing some sort of physical pain you can pass on tips on what helps you. Even referring them to these boards could be a huge help. You might even get lucky... they could be looking for help with depression, diet & nutrition, child health, whatever... and on a whim they look up your profile, read some of your posts and all the sudden they have a deeper understanding.
Well those are my 3 suggestions.... hopefully they help. If they do let me know I could use the endorphin.
Posted 04-10-2010 at 10:06 AM by bullymom