My 11 year old stepdaughter has had the problem of having accidents all the time (pooping)...my husband has no idea what else to do for her.....shes been to the drs. and nothing....its getting so bad....that we are constanly throwing out her undies....we tried telling her...that she stinks...and if we smell it, then other people do to...and we dont want them to make fun of her....there are times...she will just sit in it....and lie about it....
Have you been to a psychiatric doctor at all? I guess the part about her sitting in it has me thinking part of it could be a mental issue. There is a childhood condition where they do this, but it usually involves severe abuse and their way of coping with the trauma.
What doctors have you been to? Have you been to a pediatric gastrologist? Sometimes children develop a megacolon. They have held the BM--maybe because of fear that it would hurt. Gradually the colon because distended and they don't really feel the urge to go so the fecal matter leaks out.
Do a search on encopresis as this is what soiling is called. There is a whole retraining program of the bowel that involves the use of fiber supplements, high fiber diets, and going to the bathroom at the same time everyday--usually after a meal. This should be directed by a doctor or other professional.
Has she had this most of her life or is it recent? If it is recent, I would also investigate what is going on with her emotionally and if there is any trauma in her life that you don't know about.
Doctors should be guiding you in getting some help for this. If you have a Children's Hospital in the area, then get a referral there.
As far as sitting in it, I think that children become immune to the smell. Is she resistive to changing and cleaning herself when you talk with her? Be careful about being negative, she already feels bad about it even if she is not showing it. That will not help it. Handle it as matter of factly as you can. It is frustrating but there is help out there for it.
Encopresis...sounds exactly what she has....I know she was seen by a specialist... (dont recall what was said).but her mother (who works for a gastrologist) hasent taken her back.. you would think she could ask the Dr. she works for for help on give her another name for a specialist).she is with her mother most of the time....so Im sure she is not getting the fiber that she needs to help her...Its just so frustrating....the worse thing about this besides the soiling and her stinking.....is that she lies about it....Knowing at times...that she has been sitting in it all day How I know (when we have her) is that its dried up all over....
She definitely needs to find someone that will help her. It also sounds like some counseling would be in order to help her deal with this and get motivated to work on this. What does the school say about this? Can you talk with the school counselor or school social worker?
Can you sit down with her when she is clean and not smelling and talk with her about the problem? Tell her that you want to help. Ask her what help she needs. What has she tried? Let her know that you are on her side and want to help her--not punish or make fun or her. Let her know that you have found out that is happens to a lot of kids but something can be done about it.
I'm glad you're interested in helping her. This is not normal and needs to be taken care of.
My almost 5 year old son had problems with encopresis until this past spring. We ended up finding a program online that we bought and used and he was cured in 4 days. We had tried positive reinforcement, negative reinforcement (which really does not work), visits to a psychiatrist, and we were at our wits end when I found this program. I would love to tell you the name of the program we used but I think that is against the board rules. This program was exactly what we needed and it gave a money back guarantee if it didn't work within a set time period. I ended up calling the doctor that created this plan to tell him how happy we were with it. Sorry I can't be of more help.