hi there i may be of no help at all here but ill try aswer a couple of your questions and hopefully someone else can aswer the rest for you
eat foods with lots of fiber for the consipation, and drink plenty of water.. i dont think you can really plan which meals you should 'go' after.. just when the need arises, have u tried things like metamucil to soften the stool? i wouldnt sit on the loo too long and try force it, that could give u hemmorids or something, id say, try drinking heaps of water and eating fiber rich foods an see how that goes..
as for the apendix, i think you will no when that is about to erupt! its extreamly painful apparently! the kind of pain that will have you heading for the hospital!.. I havent had my apendix burst but before i was dx with crohns disease, the dr's thought i had apendisits due to the awful pain i had... if its anything like crohns, you will certainly no, and if it does get to that, they will whip it asap as it is an emergency procedure if it bursts... hope this helps a little, take care!!