Mira11

so sorry you're going through so much stress. there is a very good type of program that has helped children with autism and is best when started young - it's called ABA (applied behavioral analysis) and when done by qualified trained ABA staff it can be very helpful in bringing in language. do you live in a larger city that has good resources? you have a right to services for both your kids, if your youngest does have some needs, through your school district and if you're not already on board with them, definitely call asap before the special ed people are out for the summer and tell them your situation and request an eval for services, and mention ABA to see if they offer that.

Do some networking with your local autism support group and pediatric neurology depts. to see which therapists in your city work best with autistic children. Even if you do not do ABA, speech therapy by a ST who specializes in autism will be very helpful. If your kids have sensory issues (to sounds, lights, touch, smell, etc.) an occupational therapist with a speciality in sensory integration will also be very helpful.

If your school does not have an appropriate program it is their obligation to find one that does. I believe early intervention services are from birth to 3; then others from 3 on. Again, the professionals in your area are the ones to make contact with.

If you have a dx. of autism you might also be eligible for some respite time from your local county dept. of devel. disabilities. Call and get a file opened, get a worker and see what they might have.

Please know that there is help. My son has come such a long way from those very difficult early years. He is 21 now.

i don't know anything about the birthmark thing; my son has no birthmarks. does your youngest babble, make pretty good eye contact, smile at you, turn when you're calling his name?