Paruesis--bladder shyness - Cancer: Bladder Message Board

James925 · 07-23-2004, 02:35 AM

Anyone have this problem? it affects 7% of the population and i so happen to fall in the seven percent. I'm 21, i've noticed this problem ever since i can remember. I've heard people mentioning CBT to help it, but are there any other strageties to cure or help it? This problem pretty much effects my every-day life so any comments or suggestions would be grealty appreciated.

big-mike1977 · 07-25-2004, 06:55 PM

Yes, I have this problem. There's nothing like trying to avoid the urinals and timing your trips to public toilets to arrive when there is noboy in there. Then of course the classic, finding yourself standing next to someone and not be able to pee while they give you a funny look after about 30 seconds.

I haven't looked into it too much but was surprised when I found it was diagnosed as a well known condition. I happen to be shy in general and particularly with women and relationships, but I know other people are shy and don't have Paruresis.

When I'm really drunk, like my shyness, it goes away and I have no problems, but I don't drink much. There are techniques for visualising peeing on peoples shoes that are supposed to help, but I've never tried and it might get me beaten up if I actually manage to pee on someone.

Audrey-B · 07-25-2004, 09:34 PM

Wow, i never knew that this was an actual condition. I thought it was just me being "weird". In places where there are only one or two toilets and a long line of people waiting, i can basically forget about peeing!! Basically i've learnt to hold it well!! Other issues are if the toilet area is quiet and there is only one other person in there and they are in the toilet right next to me then i can't pee. Sometimes at work (we have 2 toilets next to each other) one of the ladies will come in while i'm already in one of the toilets, i swear she hasn't had time to pull her pants down and she is already peeing!! Little things which have helped me is, when out in public, using large public toilets which contain many toilets, picturing waterfalls and "hearing" them, resting part of my arm against the cold wall as the cold seems to trigger something which kickstarts something else which will often help me out.

I was a very shy child and maybe it has something to do with that, but my mother can only poinpoint my problem start when we had visited friends of my parents. The lady was a cleanliness freak and wouldn't allow me to use the indoor toilet incase it got diseased!! I was only 5 yrs old and she made me use the toilet they had in their back yard, but the light wouldn't work so my dad told me to just pee in her backyard behind one of the trees. I couldn't do it, i was so scared of being outside in the dark and thinking that all the neighbours could see me. I held on and didn't pee and when we arrived home i still couldn't pee. I finally ended up peeing the next morning and was in so much pain. At least now i know their is a name this condition.