I think I have cancer on or near my spine, please help!
I didnt know where to post this so here goes....
Hi everyone, my brain has been going non stop for a few days now! As some of you may have read I have been having tons of really crazy symptoms for the past couple months and cancer keeps coming up in my brain. I am now convinced that I have given myself cancer. I believe that I have let my anxiety kill me. I think that I am dying and that I caused myself to get cancer from all the x-rays and cat scans that I have had! I have had many cat scans and many, many x rays! Every time I have some crazy symptom I go running to the doctor or running to the ER where they do all kinds of testing on me. Sorry I meant to add that the reason why I think this is because of my many many symptoms and for a a month I have been having this numb spot in my upper back that was on and off and now its all the time and never goes away and it was a small spot and is much bigger now.
I have been having panic attacks and super high anxiety since Thursday because of this. My stomach is tied in knots and I can not stop thinking that I have killed my own self, cut my life short because I could not accept the fact that I was healthy. I keep thinking my kids are going to grow up without a mother and its my fault.
I can not stop crying and I can not stop thinking about this despite taking my medication around the clock. I dont care now how bad my symptoms get, I do not want any more x rays or cat scans. I am going to stop going to the doctors. I really need to get over this health anxiety. I am slowly killing myself, I am my own worse enemy!
Is there anyone out here like me, that has had tons of x rays and cat scans because you just keep pushing for more and more testing? I am not even kidding, I have had more scans then I can remember and some of them in a short amount of time. I am beside myself right now. I have been feeling like I am on the heels of death for a few months now with symptom after symptom, I literally feel my body falling apart.
I look at people around me happy and going on with their life but I do not see a future for myself.
Last edited by mrsboston; 09-05-2011 at 07:17 PM.